Health: Today, I found out my roommate spits the mouthwash back into...

By Anonymous - 20/03/2012 15:37 - United States - Raleigh

Today, I found out my roommate spits the mouthwash back into the bottle after he gargles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 072

You deserved it 2 671

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Same thing different taste

Drink it instead!

By SpitBreathe - 25/10/2020 14:00 - Iran Islamic Republic of

Today, I found out why the amount of mouthwash hasn't been decreasing much recently when I walked in on my dad using it and then spitting some of it back in the bottle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 275

You deserved it 75

Morning pick-me-up

By Anonymous - 30/01/2011 05:05 - United States

Today, upon waking up, I took a sip on what I thought was a cup of water on my nightstand. I quickly discovered it was my roommate's cup of used mouthwash which she was too lazy to throw out the night before. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 951

You deserved it 8 654

By Laura - 03/05/2012 07:55 - France

Today, I saw my boyfriend spitting the mouthwash back into the bottle, because, "this stuff is really expensive." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 331

You deserved it 2 603

Grossed out

By Jodi Sanford - 09/10/2021 11:01

Today, I asked my roommate to spit in the toilet instead of the sink so I wouldn't have to touch it. When I rinsed the sink after brushing my teeth, he said, "Why would you touch the sink? It’s gross." FML

I agree, your life sucks 660

You deserved it 286

By SinkyBalls - 30/08/2011 03:56 - Canada

Today, I found out my roommate thinks the sink is an appropriate place to wash his junk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 685

You deserved it 2 811

The runs

By stitchwitch - 18/05/2023 00:06

Today, I found out that my psycho roommate replaced my milk with milk of magnesia. How? By taking a huge gulp. Tonight is going to be fun. FML

I agree, your life sucks 678

You deserved it 75

Dude, WTF?

By Anonymous - 18/03/2016 20:57 - United States - Valley Stream

Today, my roommate reached a whole new level of laziness: I caught him casually peeing into an empty beer bottle while laying in bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 528

You deserved it 1 371

Party hard

By jagerbombs - 30/12/2009 19:08 - United States

Today, I woke up at a stranger's house after a long night of drinking. Before leaving, I decided to steal some mouthwash so I didn't smell like a liquor store. Thinking of the night before, I instinctively downed the Listerine like a shot and puked everywhere. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 026

You deserved it 46 422

Gross!

By cantstopfeelingit - 16/12/2019 05:00

Today, my roommate moved out. When I went into his room, I found a few things he forgot. Specifically, his beer bottle filled with nail clippings. I emptied it onto my hand before I realized what it was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 203

You deserved it 2 473

By shittysituation - 05/01/2015 06:27 - United States - Milpitas

Today, I came back from break to find that my roommate had been shitting in the bathtub for the entire 2 weeks I had been gone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 526

You deserved it 3 128

DocBastard 38

Tuesday 20 March 2012 18:51

As long as it isn't a communal bottle of mouthwash, you're probably fine. If it is, WHY THE **** ARE YOU SHARING MOUTHWASH?

Zmeilerr 22

Tuesday 20 March 2012 18:50

I wonder what else he spits.

Comments

bchatzis 9

Tuesday 20 March 2012 19:44

I have to say, this was pretty funny!

angelinaanimerg 7

Tuesday 20 March 2012 19:46

Kick him out!

ElricMustang 23

Tuesday 20 March 2012 19:49

He's going green.

max500 4

Tuesday 20 March 2012 19:50

I pissed in my roommates' mouthwash because she's a dirty, inconsiderate bitch. Maybe he thinks the same of you, OP.

TheFamilyElf 17

Tuesday 20 March 2012 19:57

That's... Ick. But why are you sharing mouthwash? Personally, that's one of those things I wouldn't share.

Fantasma666 5

Tuesday 20 March 2012 20:09

Ew, dude.

TheCaterpiller 6

Tuesday 20 March 2012 20:09

You need to get your own mouthwash, I recommend either listerine or Colgate

Bloodlvst 10

Tuesday 20 March 2012 20:11

That'll teach you, you filthy mouthwash thief.

kelsojww 0

Tuesday 20 March 2012 20:15

Why in the hell are you sharing with him in the first place!?! Do you share toothbrushes and condoms too??

Bloodlvst 10

Tuesday 20 March 2012 20:16

You don't share condoms? All the cool kids do it!

kelsojww 0

Wednesday 21 March 2012 0:38

Lmao Ewww

nick581924910112 5

Tuesday 20 March 2012 20:19

Like randomly :D

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The Top

Today, I wanted to take a nap after cleaning my apartment, so I put the trash outside the front door and put a note on the door for my roommate, saying, "Please take the trash out when you leave for work." When I woke up, the note was gone but the trash was still there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 371

You deserved it 1 986

Today, I brought my best friend home and told my dad we were going to study together. He loudly replied "Woah!", stumbled around for a few seconds like he was drunk, then apologized and said the "sheer amount of gayness" between us had overloaded his gaydar. We're not gay, dammit! FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 756

You deserved it 3 574

The Top

Today, after a 3-month dry spell and countless rejections, I gave up on being intimate with my girlfriend. Imagine my surprise when she came on to me and took me to bed. What triggered the love-making? Apparently she got horny from looking at an anime character's cleavage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 779

You deserved it 315

Today, I got home from a week-long vacation with my friend's family. When I got back home, I found the garage door had been completely demolished. My uncontrollably drunk dad blamed me. I don't even drive. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 787

You deserved it 2 743

Today, I went to get food, I was late so my friend ordered for me. I took a few bites and it was getting hard to breathe. I realized it's a bluebery muffin, I'm deathly allergic. I look to my friend, she was laughing saying she wanted to see if it was true. I just got out of the hospital. FML

I agree, your life sucks 73 136

You deserved it 5 909

Today, I moved back home after unsuccessfully trying to find work in Florida, despite living there for nine months. About 45 minutes into my 18-hour drive home, a TV station called me to offer me a job interview. I applied for that job over three months ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 240

You deserved it 2 457

Today, my mother-in-law thought it would be appropriate to give my five-year-old daughter some bedclothes with the Playboy logo all over them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 251

You deserved it 3 428

Today, a week after moving into my new house, I'm seriously considering suing the previous occupant. He failed to mention how the neighbor has his own band and rehearses every other day until 2am. Their music is so bad, it sounds like the wailing of a cat being tortured to death. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 323

You deserved it 5 490