Miscellaneous: Today, I failed a major exam. It wasn't because I didn't prepare...

By blemarooney - Ireland - Dublin

Today, I failed a major exam. It wasn't because I didn't prepare for it, though. I failed because somebody sneezed during it and I said "bless you." Apparently, that's classed as cheating. FML

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blemarooney tells us more :

Hi OP here. Thanks for all the supportive comments. I got my mum to go in and complain to my school but they kept insisting that 'rules are rules.' So maybe bless you secretly means the answer is C but I will certainly never bless anybody when they sneeze in the middle of an exam again.

Miscellaneous

Coherence dude, do you have it?

Serious times

Overreaction much?

By bready - United States

Today, I drank a ton of beers for my 25th birthday. My friends love to watch me open beer bottles with my teeth. I chipped both of my front uppers doing this. I'm no longer covered by my parents dental insurance because I'm 25 now. FML

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By CakeForBreakfast

Boomers

Today, I asked my father if I could have my grandfather's old vinyls, record player and vintage tube radio. He told me he threw those out years ago because, "Who listens to that crap anymore, now that we have mp3s?" FML

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By badcook - United States

Today, my mother-in-law gifted us with a new microwave. I told her it was too much and we didn't really need it. Her response, "I just want my grandkids to have food that tastes good for once." I'm a chef. FML

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By -___- - Sweden - Stockholm

Today, my five-year-old daughter asked me why moms don't swallow clothes, so that their babies won't be born naked. My husband burst into derisive laughter, and has now trained her into responding to the name "Derp-Derp." FML

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By Skankeriffic - United States

Today, I sat in bumper-to-bumper traffic for half an hour. The entire time, a man I had gone on a date with and that had gotten very out of hand with, was sitting in the car next to me. I noticed, panicked, and tried to drive off, rear-ending the car in front of me. FML

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By anonymous - United States - Monroe

Today, my girlfriend told me that she didn't know we were actually dating. FML

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By ouch - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I were playfully arguing about who loved the other more. After about a minute of this, my girlfriend walked over and kicked me in the crotch as hard as she could. She then said, "There, now you don't love me as much. I win." FML

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52532

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By Anonymous

Today, I walked in on my little brother dressing up like Billie Eilish, his new favorite singer. He tore up some of my favorite clothes to make the outfits. FML

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By Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, I found out that when I thought the bullying had finally stopped, the bullies had actually been sponsored to be nice for charity. FML

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By camzzz - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I were walking around when she got lost in a crowd. And me, being a pig, playfully grabbed her butt. I realized it wasn't hers when the guy whose butt I'd grabbed by accident knocked me unconscious. FML

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By KobraKommander - France

Today, I rear-ended a car while I was texting about the accident ahead which was causing all the traffic. FML

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7491

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By Anonymous - Canada - Prince George

Today, it's been 2 days since my boyfriend "accidentally" slipped into the wrong hole while continuing to hammer me at full speed. I still can't poop or even walk right. FML

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By Anonymous - United States - Arlington

Today, I returned home from an extended vacation only to find out my cousin wasn't kidding when he said he was going to steal my boyfriend. I thought I was dating a straight guy. FML

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By trgtyo - United States

Today, I noticed my parents replaced my senior picture that hung on our livingroom wall with a painted one. Of our German Sheperd. FML

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By wetandhungry - United States - Houston

Today, I came home to find water dripping from the ceiling in my apartment laundry room/pantry. All of my groceries were ruined. Maintenance's suggestion? "Put a bucket under it." FML

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By Username - United States

Today, I have a horrible hangover. My mom also decided it was a good day to go hiking. I ended up puking on the trail. FML

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796

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By Nakdnathan - United States

Today, I got written up for not making a drink right. While getting yelled at by my boss, my co-worker made the drink the same exact way I made it. I pointed it out. My boss responded with, "He is allowed to because I like him, I don't like you." FML

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By not-so-young-shortie - United States

Today, I was eating at a restaurant with my boyfriend, he is 6'2 and i am 4'11. Out of nowhere, the hostess started openly flirting with him, and asked him if he needed a booster chair for his daughter. FML

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By sad and hungry - United States - Hackensack

Today, I'm getting over a nasty breakup, and decided to treat myself and order a pizza online. After waiting 45 minutes, I checked the site. Turns out, I'd forgotten to change the address on the site. I sent my ex a free pizza. FML

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By breakinphones - United States

Today, I threw my brand new iPhone 4 in the air whilst laying on my bed. It came down, went through my fingers, landed on my balls, then broke on the concrete floor. FML

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By holycow - United States

Today, I was awakened, in the middle of the night, by the sound of crying coming from outside. There's a mile in between houses where I live. FML

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By Anonymous - United States

Today, I thought it would be funny to sneak up behind my cat and scare it with a loud "boo!" The cat responded by jumping up, and running across my apartment, which would have been fine, except for the fact she left a trail of liquid shit everywhere she went. FML

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By stupid - United States

Today, I had to hand write a 10 page essay for one of my classes. When I turned it in I got an automatic zero. It was written in blue. Not black. FML

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By me - United States

Today, while in my drama class, my character in a play has to quickly jump up out from his desk. Somehow, my shirt got caught on the desk, ripping it almost completely off in front of a live audience. FML

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By Anonymous - Canada - London

Today, I told my mom about the rough time I'm having over my recent break-up, and how I can't help thinking about my ex every single day. Her attempt to console me involved saying, "Pft. I bet he doesn't think about you every day" and walking away. Thanks. FML

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By klutz44 - United States - Winnetka

Today, I took my 2 year old to the potty in a public restroom. I was just about to set her on the toilet when the automatic flush went off, scaring her and causing her to pee all over both of us. FML

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33604

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By tortured - United States

Today, my coworkers were bored. To solve this, they taped me to a chair and tried tickling me to death. My boss joined in. FML

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By Tgreject - United States

Today, I was planning on asking out a girl I've been really close to for a few months now. I was with her when I got a forward text from my friend. It was from the girl and it said "noooo tell him not to ask me out I don't like him." I got rejected via forward text before I told her how I felt. FML

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By Anonymous

Sit and stew

Today, my dog and I got sprayed by a skunk. I have no tomato juice or baking soda, and the bus doesn't come for another 3 hours. FML

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1334

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By Anonymous - Canada - Surrey

Today, the girl I've gone on two dates with showed up at my house with several boxes of her stuff, expecting to move in. FML

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By Anonymous - United Kingdom - London

Today, I underwent surgery and feeling rather groggy upon being awoken, I very loudly declared, "I've always had a thing for doctors. Kiss me?" then promptly giggled, tried to launch myself in a random doctor's arms and fell flat on my face. FML

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By Theslacker... - United States - Coplay

Today, a number of people came to visit me in the hospital, including my grandparents. They called me "weak" and "a cowardly millennial" for going to the ER instead of sucking it up, and blamed me for rising healthcare costs. I had a compound fracture. FML

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By Unknown - United States

Today, in art class, I tried to attract my crush's attention by slowly sitting down in front of him. Too bad I missed the chair and fell onto the floor. FML

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By "Kymberly Hams" - Australia

Today, my toddler was supposed to be taking a nap. Instead, he decided it was the perfect time to remove his own nappy for the first time ever. He painted his walls, floor, bed and body, then started crying because he was dirty. FML

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1911

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By BaggedDown - United States - Rochester

Today, I retrieved the wrong luggage from an airport carousel. I'm now the owner of two water-bras, a false beard, a bag of cat litter, and some anal beads. I am afraid to get in touch with the original owner. FML

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By RYZILLAHitZ - United States

Today, as I was walking home from work, my dad drove past, pulled over, rolled down the window and asked, "Are you tired of walking?" To which I replied "Yes!" Just as I reached for the car door, he yelled "RUN A WHILE" and sped off. FML

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38915

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By TooYoungForThis - Canada

Today, I sneezed so hard that I threw my back out. Now my back is in agonizing pain, and I can barely walk. FML

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45071

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By Lalalala - 6/9/2020 02:02 - United States - Austin

Post-it

Today, my boyfriend told me to stay home, because he wanted to come by to give me a birthday surprise. Later on, he came by, posted a note, rung the bell and left. The note was a break up note. FML

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By fuck - Canada - Airdrie

Late reaction

Today, I was masturbating in my bedroom, when suddenly, my mom opened the door and walked in with guests. I didn't react quick enough. FML

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2193

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By Anonymous - United States

Today, I checked over my notes from yesterday's midterm review so I could study for the test on Monday. It seems I was so exhausted, I'd done nothing but scribble unintelligibly all over the first page. FML

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Top comments

By Welshite | 39

#6279713 - Saturday 2 May 2015 18:52

Next time your prof sneezes condemn him to Hell.

"May your soul belong to Satan, you unholy demon-spawn. "

By _kyleG_ | 34

#6279730 - Saturday 2 May 2015 19:01

Everyone knows that bless you means the answer is C!

COMMENTS

By Welshite | 39

#6279713 - Saturday 2 May 2015 18:52

Next time your prof sneezes condemn him to Hell.

"May your soul belong to Satan, you unholy demon-spawn. "

JMichael | 25

#6279739 - Saturday 2 May 2015 19:09

Not sure why this if downvoted. I found it funny.

Whyismydogcrazy | 5

#6279801 - Saturday 2 May 2015 20:02

So did I. I kind of hope the OP does it, without getting in trouble!

Evil_Jester | 17

#6279814 - Saturday 2 May 2015 20:19

I hear you.

TiddlesWiddles | 15

#6279823 - Saturday 2 May 2015 20:33

Reminds me of the FML post saying that the teacher thought two people were cheating from them having colds- the teacher thought their sneezes was a form of communication.

1dvos_grl3 | 21

#6279856 - Saturday 2 May 2015 22:02

#10 All the religious freaks out there were probably "offended"

RedPillSucks | 31

#6279906 - Saturday 2 May 2015 23:44

you can be religious and find it funny.
I know I did.

Ritokage | 3

#6280061 - Sunday 3 May 2015 2:15

#47
Thus the wording "religious freaks" with focus on the freak. For example the people in the Westboro Baptist Church maybe

lexa1love | 16

#6280122 - Sunday 3 May 2015 4:33

Ehh idk, the westboro baptist church seems to condemn just about everybody to hell. I'm religious and found his comment funny, but I wouldn't consider myself a freak either.

HeroofWinds1 | 13

#6280418 - Sunday 3 May 2015 13:05

I remember that to. It was sniffles though

dancinwookie | 21

#6285662 - Saturday 9 May 2015 0:43

I've done that. It didn't go over well. Lol!

By unknownuser2899 | 9

#6279715 - Saturday 2 May 2015 18:53

thats sucks im sorry

By ImAFaker | 29

#6279719 - Saturday 2 May 2015 18:54

That's just sick

fireballftw1123 | 5

#6280142 - Sunday 3 May 2015 5:22

b-dmm tss

By TheTedster | 15

#6279721 - Saturday 2 May 2015 18:54

So apparently being a nice person is considered cheating these days...

TheBelt | 19

#6279754 - Saturday 2 May 2015 19:22

Apparently according to #17 the answer was C

thejonac | 21

#6279772 - Saturday 2 May 2015 19:34

your profile pic is so suitable for your comment

TheBelt | 19

#6279773 - Saturday 2 May 2015 19:36

* #7

redstone7693 | 29

#6279867 - Saturday 2 May 2015 22:27

I read an FML recently where these two kids were both given zeros on a test because they were both sniffling and the teacher thought they were "speaking in code" hahaha ridiculous.

By alexlots | 20

#6279722 - Saturday 2 May 2015 18:54

Wow didn't know being polite counted as cheating

By Kailayla | 29

#6279723 - Saturday 2 May 2015 18:55

Wow, that's a ridiculous reason to fail you. Can't you put in a complaint or something?

By _kyleG_ | 34

#6279730 - Saturday 2 May 2015 19:01

Everyone knows that bless you means the answer is C!

howard007 | 18

#6279882 - Saturday 2 May 2015 23:06

Actually is means the answer is b

fireballftw1123 | 5

#6280143 - Sunday 3 May 2015 5:23

I thought it meant Istanbul

By ApplePie1994 | 27

#6279731 - Saturday 2 May 2015 19:03

Well, remember the mix up a few years ago where they handed out the second paper for higher level English by a mistake? This would not be the first derp caused by examiners in this country.

fakedsincerity | 32

#6280727 - Sunday 3 May 2015 21:22

By hippodankamus | 22

#6279738 - Saturday 2 May 2015 19:09

Just goes to show how fucked up our education system is.

CODplayer4lyfe | 24

#6279762 - Saturday 2 May 2015 19:26

I agree, but OP kinda sorta lives in Ireland

hippodankamus | 22

#6279774 - Saturday 2 May 2015 19:37

I should really start looking at the locations.

By Hiimhaileypotter | 52

#6279740 - Saturday 2 May 2015 19:09

I always say bless you when someone sneezes even during exams... If this happened to me I'd be so pissed. You should see if there's anything you can do to change that. Sorry OP!