By mtr1594 - 31/07/2013 06:47 - United States - Henderson

Today, I crawled into bed with my boyfriend. He was snoring loudly which is how I knew he was passed out cold. Once I was under the blanket next to him, he slowly turned over, stared me straight in the face and said, "I have to kill you". Then started snoring again. FML
I agree, your life sucks 59 921
You deserved it 4 329

mtr1594 tells us more.

mtr1594 8

Hey, it's me, OP. So this isn't the first time he's sleep talked before. Occasionally he'll moan, or like the other night, mutter something about eating Nutella. Anyway. This is the first time it scared the bejesus out of me and the first time he opened his eyes. Usually I ask him about it the next morning and he has no idea and wants to know what he said. This morning it was the same response. When I asked what he was dreaming about, he was dreaming that he was a bad ass drug lord apparently. I think we've been watching too much Weeds, the TV show...

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JoeGrant 12

You should talk to him about it and see how he reacts, if he acts a bit strange I would recommend getting away and running. Immediately.

Well, thanks for getting back to us. At least we know you're alive :)

Comments

JoeGrant 12

You should talk to him about it and see how he reacts, if he acts a bit strange I would recommend getting away and running. Immediately.

tfriedrich49 9

Op, your username is a little scared. You should be very scared

He'd probably deny it to avoid compromising his mission

Strangers things have happened in that bed

My version of "strange" must be completely different than yours...

Sleep with one eye open OP

I don't know about that. I've never done a stranger's thing in my bed. I usually take the time to get to know the young lady.

R5luver 5

I'll bet he wasn't even asleep in the first place and he was trying to mess with you, then rolled over and went back to "sleep".

JE553 9

Some may say its scary others say it's fair warning

Kill him before he kills you.

zed34 18

How sweet he sounds!

Now is the perfect time to show your boyfriend to the couch, with a locked door and tacks on the floor...

I know right? He sounds like a complete teddy bear!

K410 18

Lol when boys talk in their sleep

Super sexy pillow talk

It's Legos they hurt a lot more

but be her luck she would forget about the tacks and step on them to get to the bathroom haha

He sounds like he'd be a great CIA agent :)

cottoncandymango 17

He's gonna kill you..... With his obnoxious snoring.

Gives sleeper cell a whole new meaning

Gothicbunnyx3 16

I wouldn't worry too much OP, my grandma does the same thing.

Talking about Grandma, you haven't seen your Grandpa in a while...

Gothicbunnyx3 16

Yea maybe because he died of leukemia.

Or so she says....

You sleep with your grandma?

#89 maybe 'visiting' grandma. (if you've ever heard the term before)

Gothicbunnyx3 16

No #89 she screams from her bedroom when we visit, so it's not to difficult to hear.

Obey_StudBoii 23

This reminds me of an episode from American Dad.

Gothicbunnyx3 16

What episode has Stan not pulled out his gun or threatened to kill someone in the family?

Obey_StudBoii 23

Ha. All the episodes he's done that. Hilarious show

Convincing fake snores maybe. Sounds like a prank, but weird shit can happen in someone's sleep...

My boyfriend says silly things in his sleep sometimes. I find it adorable, but if he said something like that, I'd be terrified!

He must've had an awesome dream!

TheDrifter 23

Whisper nonsense in his ear in a Russian accent, then stand back and watch the results.

CallMeMcFeelii 13

OP's boyfriend is obviously a Russian sleeper agent. I bet OP has freezing cold feet like almost every girl I've slept with, and the feel of them kick started his KGB mind in action. Damn it, now I just scared myself..

Gosh, that Italian family at the next table sure is quiet.

tfriedrich49 9

Be afraid. Be very afraid

Is your father going to shoot him?

killer6969 16

I see what you did there ;)