Kids: Today, I advised my daughter to not drink a Coke before bed....

By hejdixjeln - 17/03/2013 10:25 - United States - Evanston

Today, I advised my daughter to not drink a Coke before bed. She smiled at me and reassured me that it could be balanced out with sleeping pills. I'm raising a future drug addict. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 011

You deserved it 7 533

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Same thing different taste

Irony failure

By alcoholic - 31/10/2009 14:30 - Estonia

Today, I was telling my teenage daughter about the effects from alcohol, and how she should not give in to peer pressure. While talking, I noticed that she was looking at me funny. There was a wine glass in my hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 822

You deserved it 51 682

By cazorp - 05/01/2012 11:43 - United States

Today, my mom told me she's a drug addict, sold my bed to buy meth, and then lectured me about how I should be okay with it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 402

You deserved it 2 463

By failedparenting - 07/09/2016 16:44 - United States - Bronx

Today, I figured out why I have been feeling so drowsy and lethargic for the past week. My daughter had been slipping sleeping pills into my coffee as payback for taking her phone away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 839

You deserved it 1 731

Gummy

By madeleine - 08/04/2021 05:00

Today, I caught my young daughter eating candy after brushing her teeth. Angry, I asked her if she wanted all her teeth to fall out. She smiled and said, “Yes!” FML

I agree, your life sucks 669

You deserved it 287

Teenagers, amirite?

By JustShootMe - 02/11/2020 07:57 - Australia - Gladstone

Today, my daughter told me she would rather hang herself than hang out with me. All I did was remind her to go to bed at a reasonable time to get some sleep for an activity she likes doing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 086

You deserved it 123

Intervention

By _Tatyana_ - 13/06/2013 07:05 - United States - Gettysburg

Today, after getting my wisdom teeth pulled, I woke up from a much needed nap realizing I should take my pain medication. My mother then told me she had thrown them out so I wouldn't get addicted and become a drug dealer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 982

You deserved it 3 623

Faulty logic

By hhhhhhhh - 28/09/2023 06:00

Today, my daughter thinks the way to save money is to stop taking her antidepressants, because they give her “uncontrollable” food cravings. FML

I agree, your life sucks 591

You deserved it 106

By coolkid111 - 27/03/2011 00:26 - United States

Today, I was going to my prom. My mom knows I want to drink so to prevent me, she made sure I took my prescription medicine before I left. I guess her way of stopping me from drinking is killing myself If I do. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 411

You deserved it 39 981

By Disappointed - 04/10/2014 03:08

Today, my teenage daughter asked me to buy her the morning after pill, saying, "It's for my acne." FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 796

You deserved it 5 123

By no she wasn't high - 02/12/2013 02:50 - United States - Garland

Today, I had to explain to my daughter that just because it says non-toxic on the crayons, it doesn't mean that you should eat them. She's 16. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 879

You deserved it 5 880

DefiningDivine 13

Sunday 17 March 2013 19:16

Hence the word "Raising" Meaning, you should still be able to teach her and help her understand.

NessieMonster188 17

Sunday 17 March 2013 19:18

So what you're saying is.. *puts on sunglasses* That's not the only Coke in her future. ...that was terrible, I know.

Comments

Catkam623 27

Sunday 17 March 2013 19:21

Did it occur to you to perhaps just take the coke away from her

debbster7 18

Sunday 17 March 2013 19:22

Just because she smart it doesn't mean she'll be a drug addict

Ultimate_No 7

Sunday 17 March 2013 19:39

This FML went right over your head, didn't it?

SqueakyChipmunk 21

Sunday 17 March 2013 19:43

Whoosh!

docscientist 9

Sunday 17 March 2013 23:28

That's the thing. She isn't smart.

cieloalicia 16

Monday 18 March 2013 1:03

How in the hell is trying to balance caffeine with sleeping pills smart?

DefiningDivine 13

Monday 18 March 2013 8:24

@29: Which head?

calipilot227 16

Sunday 17 March 2013 19:22

I love a good bourbon with my sleeping pills, personally.

gc327072 30

Sunday 17 March 2013 20:28

Why not Bailey's? It is St. Patrick's day, after all!

emilyjgraham 34

Monday 18 March 2013 0:33

how would a biscuit help wash a sleeping pill down?..

AliceLockehart 18

Monday 18 March 2013 1:09

Where do biscuits come into this? Sense. Your comment makes none.

melons 44

Monday 18 March 2013 3:00

It does if you're from the UK, where a bourbon biscuit is a chocolate flavoured treat.

calipilot227 16

Monday 18 March 2013 3:57

Bourbon is whiskey here in the US. And for those of you who didn't get the joke, that combo will probably kill you.

IAmJad 18

Sunday 17 March 2013 19:22

Key words: I'm raising. Fix something.

3rdbass 9

Sunday 17 March 2013 19:27

I certainly hope this is an eye opener, OP. Don't leave your medication lying around.

TheWorldGreatest 8

Sunday 17 March 2013 19:28

Stop putting your head in the sand, and start being a parent!

cjoe 2

Sunday 17 March 2013 19:29

Plot twist: daughter is 30 and still living with her mom.

picante72 24

Sunday 17 March 2013 19:30

Plus cough syrup and vanilla extract.

perdix 29

Sunday 17 March 2013 19:33

Be careful with this one. She might decide to balance out your nagging and criticism with rat poison.

xKeroseneHearts 9

Sunday 17 March 2013 19:35

How old is she?! Lmao

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Same thing different taste

Irony failure

Gummy

Teenagers, amirite?

Intervention

Faulty logic

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