Today, at my job, an old lady kept calling her inhaler a blow job. I kindly explained to her why she couldn't call her inhaler that. She continued to ask me for a blow job in front of visitors. I had to say yes. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I got bitched at by an old lady in Walmart for not wearing a mask. I had lowered my mask to use my inhaler, because I was having an asthma attack. FML
Today, I was on a walk when I ran into the woman whose kids I babysit. We had a quick chat, and I noticed she had just blown her driveway clean. As I left, I said "You did a nice blow job!" FML
Today, my mom asked me for advice on how to give a good blow job. I'm a guy. FML
Today, my girlfriend was giving me a blowjob. All of a sudden, she stopped and said, "What's that thing at the back of your throat called?" FML
Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend. When she went to give me a blow job, I got embarrassed and told her I'd rather just please her instead. Now she thinks she's inadequate and I'm being a jerk. FML
Today, I was out with my friend. My six year old daughter was also with us. While we were walking through the parking lot, my daughter asked me in a very loud voice "Mommy, does a blow job taste bad?" FML
Today, whilst working in a pharmacy, I was given the pleasure of listening to an old lady share the details of what she sticks up her vagina. FML
Today, I was talking to my husband about how I wanted our marriage to improve and not just be sex all the time. In the middle of my sentence, he asked for a blow job. FML
Today, I asked my girlfriend of a year and a half to give me a blow job. She replied okay and bent down and blew on my penis. Then she looked up at me and said, "Was that good?" She was serious. FML
Today, I was in the cinema making out with my girlfriend. I asked her if she could stop trying to pass me her gum because it was kinda gross. She replied, "It's not gum, I just have bronchitis." FML
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Top comments
KBeatz 5
This just sounds like a very humorous old lady to me. Hopefully I can still bring the jokes at that age.
XKXKKXK 10
My grandmother LOVES ********!
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Comments (74)
vikskellington 0
What a great old dear and such a wonderful sense of humour. I'm going to call my inhalers that from now on.
brookemurray17 5
Blow jobs as prescribed(:
bubo_fml 11
Agree only if she removes her dentures!
i_am_that_one 0
Maybe she just pulled one on ya. Hah
jayzyone 4
The old gal's still pitchin', bet she knew exactly what she was doing and messing with you. She's old, what else has she got to do?
HitchHiker42 18
Well, that blows.
AksentNetharia 12
I think that there's some hardcore granny trolling happening. Some older folks tend to mess with young people.
rae_siah_3x 17
Well that's awkward.
zoie_007 4
I bet she was just ******* with you to get a laugh
Kqzza 13
Pretty sure she meant it.