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  FFPulley  |  9

Steps for recovery after this day;
Step 1: Drive to nearest liquor store
Step 2: Buy your favorite bottle of booze (I prefer Vodka)
Step 3: Drive home
Step 4: Open bottle, drink the entire contents of bottle, get mind numbingly drunk, pass out, and forget it ever happened.

  alex1432  |  9

It's times like this, the things my father would say to me..."what the hell are you doing in the bathroom all day and night? Why don't you get out and give someone else a chance!"

  dre_bro11  |  12

68 you're right. It was a suicidal bird instead.

And 56, it's not OP's fault. Have you seen the way those little fucked up creatures fly from the opposite side of the road, across 4 lanes of traffic and, in most cases (this one excluded) merely miss being hit by you? Cause I see it all the time.
Plus, just because OP didn't have work, doesn't mean he had no reason to go out. Not everyone stays home on their free days.


I hate the feeling of complete idiocy as I've been through the same thing except it was commuting to school. The relief that you get remembering you have the day off almost makes up for it.

  bizarre_ftw  |  21

You mean that awkward moment when the bird comes back to life and haunts you by possessing every partner you get for the rest of your life and causing them to act like malnourished intercity cartoon raccoons?
Yeah...... I hate that too..... :/

  EnEl_Infierno  |  15

Once upon a midnight dreary, while I pondered, weak and weary Over many a quaint and curious volume of forgotten lore, While I nodded, nearly napping, suddenly there came a tapping, As of some one gently rapping., While I nodded, nearly napping, suddenly there came a tapping, As of some one gently rapping.

That poor bird will haunt him forever. Haha.