Health, Embarrassing and Exams: This is fine - FML

This is fine

By Anonymous - 14/08/2024 22:00 - Australia - Darwin

Today, during a silent exam, my stomach made the loudest, most embarrassing growling noise possible. It was so loud that the professor looked up and some people in the room turned to look at me. The girl next to me offered me a granola bar, and I accepted, even though the growl was actually me desperately holding in a fart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 437

You deserved it 104

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Same thing different taste

Vibrate mode

By ChiefKoala - 27/01/2020 14:00 - United States - Rockwood

Today, my stomach growled so loudly in class that my professor told us to make sure our phones were silenced. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 921

You deserved it 222

By Hth - 28/10/2008 00:13 - United States

Today, I farted A LOT during an exam, all silent, so I figured I should be OK. Then I looked around and everybody was suffocating and giving me sly looks. I'm now known to everyone in the department as SuperFart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 331

You deserved it 43 745

Toot toot

By Anonymous - 08/07/2022 12:00 - Hong Kong - Central District

Today, I had a dictation test. The whole classroom was silent, but I suddenly needed to fart. Not to break the silence, I wanted to fart slowly in the hope it would be silent. It didn't make the fart less obvious, it just made it longer, so that everyone noticed and started laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 891

You deserved it 399

By qourt - 14/02/2019 15:34 - United States

Today, my stomach growled so loud in class that a boy sitting next to me thought his phone had vibrated. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 398

You deserved it 2 278

By yogapants - 24/09/2010 20:21 - Switzerland

Today, I let out the most horrific, loudest, and most vile smelling fart I have ever had in my life while in the middle of yoga class. Out of embarrassment, I tried to lessen the tension in the silent room by giggling, but no one saw the funny side. I was given looks of horror, and avoided by everyone else for the rest of the class. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 250

You deserved it 14 868

Better out than in

By Anonymous - 25/03/2024 20:00 - United States

Today, I was in the middle of a chemistry exam when I felt an urgent need to fart that was difficult to hold in. I sit in the back, so I tried to do the "One Cheek Sneak." It came out sounding like a loud, obnoxious kazoo. The professor remarked, "No hazardous chemicals outside the lab!" Everyone laughed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 427

You deserved it 237

By fartwoman - 23/06/2010 01:41 - United States

Today, in math class, I had the urge to fart. I had the bright idea that if I dropped my textbook and farted at the same time, nobody would hear it. I dropped my textbook, everyone looked at me, then I farted. Loudly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 134

You deserved it 62 899

By Anonymous - 30/09/2013 16:22 - United States - Union

Today, while in class, I had to sneeze. Not wanting to make a lot of noise, I held it in, only to instead let out a huge, long fart. Everyone, including the teacher, turned and stared at me intently. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 365

You deserved it 8 112

By pleasestop - 11/06/2011 08:48 - Australia

Today, I woke up with bowel problems which have been causing me to violently pass wind every couple of minutes. I have to spend the next two hours sitting an exam in dead silence. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 199

You deserved it 3 420

Never trust your anus

By JacksFarts - 18/06/2024 12:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I was in an elevator going up to the 32nd floor when I felt the urge to let out a fart. Feeling like it was either fart now or have appendicitis, and that it would be quiet, I thought no one would notice. It wasn't silent. It was loud and proud, and the cute girl next to me started laughing uncontrollably. FML

I agree, your life sucks 163

You deserved it 500

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Keywords

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The Top

Today, my girlfriend was on top in reverse cowgirl. After she orgasmed, all I heard was, "Oh fuck" and she clenched her butt to try stop, but it was too late, she shot diarrhoea up my stomach, chest and neck. The only reason I didn’t get any in my mouth was because it all got caught in my beard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 079

You deserved it 410

Today, my nosey louse of a coworker went to HR and told them I was snorting drugs at my desk. I was using nasal saline, as the dry winter weather wreaks havoc on my sinuses. The fact that they even brought me in pisses me off beyond words. FML

I agree, your life sucks 467

You deserved it 75

The Top

Today, I learned that people never change. My boyfriend left me at three months pregnant, the same thing he did to his last girlfriend. I know now exactly how things will go down for my successor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 493

You deserved it 1 161

Today, I woke up to the rickety old ceiling fan above my bed crashing down on top of me. I'm fine, however I am now grounded until I can buy a new ceiling fan to replace the one I "broke". FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 996

You deserved it 303

Today, it looks like I may have an STD. My fiancé and his friends went to Vegas two months ago. He says he's been completely faithful. They say what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas. Turns out that's not quite true. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 025

You deserved it 4 721

Today, my boyfriend met my dad for the first time. The first thing he said to him was, "You're an idiot for dating my daughter." FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 087

You deserved it 4 338

Today, I held my daughter’s fifth birthday at the park. What started as a fun playdate with all her friends turned into a day of horror, when a pair of teenage boys started running around our pavillion, screaming, “Babies come from sex! Babies come from sex!” FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 043

You deserved it 141

Today, my cat decided to show me just how much he loves me by bringing a live snake into my bedroom. Thanks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 163

You deserved it 622