Kids, Health, Birthday and Cute: Thanks, but no thanks

Thanks, but no thanks

By hoping to live to see next year - 29/07/2018 15:00

Today, my son surprised me by waking me up to be first to greet me a happy birthday. He was with his marching band buddies in full battle gear, playing the chorus of Stars and Stripes Forever. In my bedroom. At 5 a.m. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 526

You deserved it 671

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Same thing different taste

It's still a bop! It slaps!

By Please find a new song - 20/11/2024 17:00 - United States

Today, I was once again woken up to my dad blasting The Beatles' song "Birthday." He does this whenever it's anyone's birthday (in this case, my mom's) and he knows a lot of people. It was funny at first, but now it's getting old very quickly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 341

You deserved it 86

By Thomas - 13/12/2009 06:46 - Canada

Today, I woke up to find my parents singing "Happy birthday" with lots of hugs and kisses. My birthday is next week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 743

You deserved it 2 718

By todaddy - 23/05/2014 19:32 - United Kingdom

Today, my 5-year-old son woke up early and ran into my bedroom to wake me up. Unfortunately, he did this by jumping onto my bed, slamming his knee into my balls in the process. I had to explain my tears of agony away by claiming I was just so happy to see him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 219

You deserved it 4 774

By Devotedmom - 10/01/2016 09:07 - Belgium - Li?ge

Today, I got up at 5 am to bake a surprise birthday cake for my 16-year-old son. I put the cake on the table and went to call my son. "Surprise!" When I came back 30 seconds later, the cake was all gone and the dog was licking his lips. My son won't even believe I made a cake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 059

You deserved it 3 120

By SleepyMommy - 08/05/2016 17:05 - United States - Pomona

Today, my husband was going to let me sleep in for Mother's Day. That would have been great, if my brother didn't call me at 5:30 in the morning to say Happy Mother's Day. Now I'm up like any other day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 427

You deserved it 1 071

Party!

By kelkline - 31/08/2009 16:45 - United States

Today, my friend got a babysitter for the kids and told me she was taking me to a party. My son told me his band was playing at a party. I will be 40 tomorrow, so I thought this would be the best surprise birthday party ever. It WAS a surprise birthday party – for a friend of ours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 083

You deserved it 3 533

Happy birthday to me

By lukey101 - 20/07/2023 02:00 - Australia

Today, it’s my birthday. My boss treated me to a day off work, except my mother called at 12:01am drunk as hell screaming, “Happy birthday” down the phone. When I finally fell back asleep, I awoke to my boss asking me to come in after all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 825

You deserved it 115

Friends

By Anonymous - 17/02/2010 07:39 - United States

Today, it's my 18th birthday. Last month was my best friend's 18th birthday. She spent the night with me, and the next morning, my mom and brother gathered in my room and sang "Happy Birthday" as they handed her pancakes with a candle on top. Today, I was woken up by screams to take the trash out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 649

You deserved it 2 626

By ad4 - 31/01/2011 23:11 - United States

Today, I was woken up by my family surrounding me with breakfast in bed and "Sweet 16" balloons. My birthday is in 3 months, and I'll be 17. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 192

You deserved it 4 122

By ohfantastic - 25/01/2009 02:47 - United States

Today, I was sleeping with my boyfriend and woke up in his arms to hear him say "Mom, Mom." FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 696

You deserved it 2 385

Ryan Wise 7

Sunday 29 July 2018 15:02

That sounds awesome, not awful!

Sertorius 10

Saturday 14 July 2018 14:03

Best. Birthday. Ever.

Comments

BurnInDemonFire 34

Friday 13 July 2018 19:17

Brilliant! ******* hilarious! Though personally, I would have gone with "Louie, Louie".

Sertorius 10

Saturday 14 July 2018 14:03

Best. Birthday. Ever.

Ryan Wise 7

Sunday 29 July 2018 15:02

That sounds awesome, not awful!

chosha_fml 26

Sunday 29 July 2018 19:37

In hindsight maybe.

Glowworm56 26

Sunday 29 July 2018 15:10

What exactly is "Full battle gear" for a marching band?

silentbabydeer 10

Sunday 29 July 2018 16:05

I would assume the marching band uniforms.

RichardPencil 30

Sunday 29 July 2018 16:36

How the hell are all these kids up and ready to play at 5 am? Are these the Marching Zombies from the High School for Insomnia?

Ishvah 15

Sunday 29 July 2018 16:39

aren't you so lucky.

ChromoTec 24

Sunday 29 July 2018 16:41

Seeing as this was posted on the 29th of July, I'm wondering what school your son goes to where they start marching band that early. My marching band camp is the week of August 6th, and even then our marching band outfit check-out isn't until the week after

BurnInDemonFire 34

Monday 30 July 2018 2:52

Dude. Check the date of my comment. This was under the "Nearly FML" tab about two weeks ago.

ChromoTec 24

Monday 30 July 2018 16:23

So that's even earlier? Geez, how early does this school start?

RichardPencil 30

Monday 30 July 2018 6:42

One time ... at band camp ... we got woken up at 4 am. As a hazing ritual. When I became a sophomore, we got a new director who banned (pun intended) hazing.

BiGTiMeNeRD 29

Monday 30 July 2018 14:33

If ya gotta point out your puns, you're trying too hard.

ChromoTec 24

Monday 30 July 2018 16:25

We got woken up at 5 AM and got put in a car, blindfolded, where we went to get some of the other "rookies" and then they drove us to a church where we got free breakfast. Sad that I don't get to do it again (at least until I'm a junior, where I can become section leader)