Today, I was at work laminating a large photo. While I was doing this, I had a sudden itch on my nut sack. So I quickly scratched it away. When the customer came to pick up the print, I noticed that one of my pubic hairs had laminated itself on the cheek of the woman in the photograph. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my dormant eczema decided to come back with a vengeance - on my scrotum. I work in an open office and can't scratch unless I repeatedly run into the restroom. FML
Today, I was fired for having a haircut that was 'inappropriate for the workplace'. I have alopecia. My boss told me to stop making up excuses. FML
Today, I was clipping my abnormally thick toenails. I had to apply so much pressure on the clippers that a nail flew off, hit me in the eyeball and scratched my cornea. The doctor nearly fell off his chair laughing during my eye exam after I told him what happened. FML
Today, I accidentally ran my thumb down the cheese grater while preparing lunch beside my wife. I instantly jerked my hand away from the grater just in time run my forearm across the knife she was using. I now have 20 stitches and 5 staples in my arm, no lunch, and a puking wife. FML
Today, my mom confessed to me that she used to pluck my step-dad's butt hair. I hope the brain-gods delete this obnoxious mental picture. FML
Today, I almost got fired from work because a customer complained that I "threw up gang signs" at him. I was blocking the sun from my eyes. FML
Today, I woke up with the worst vaginal itching and swelling. I then find out it was brought on by my boyfriend's cheap brand of toilet paper. FML
Today, I was on a train, sitting next to an old man who was reading a newspaper. Suddenly, he sneezed without putting his hands over his nose. Instead of turning towards the window, he turned towards me. FML
Today, I accidentally set my hair on fire while lighting a cigarette. I panicked and put it out by slapping myself in the face. FML
Today, I went to the doctor to inquire about the rash I've been getting in my underarms, behind my knees and sometimes on my face. Turns out I'm allergic to sweat. I'm a varsity rugby coach, gym teacher, and I just shelled out a stack of cash to get a sauna and steam room installed in my house. FML
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Top comments
TeenTiger 0
Could you tell us the location of your work place so we can all avoid it. Thanks.
VerticalOrbit 0
Ok, so, you put your hand IN YOUR PANTS? I'm not a guy, but most guys I've seen that get an itch, usually don't put their hand in their pants. You're doing it wrong.
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Comments (186)
WFactor 0
That's hilarious.
beccaishereyay 11
"Today, I went to get a largevpicture of myself laminated. the guy proceeded to rub his ballsack then continued to laminate my picture like nothing happened. when it was finished there was a large pubic hair on my cheek, FML."
ccftw 0
this is why the razor was invented, ladies and gentlemen
hazelkee 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
eww. shaving the private??! that's gross.
terranada 3
ydi for having hairy nuts
limabeans101029 21
why is shaving your privates gross? lots of ppl do it. u see, most guys dont like it when their gfs have bushes. and some girls dont like it when their bfs do either. how old ARE you?
ronton 4
you stuck your hand inside your pants to scratch??? WTF
BarcodeDragon 0
I thought it said that he was laminating a potato. I need some sleep.
nlm92 15
#177 That's not necessarily true. Preferences vary from person to person. I makes sense to keep it trimmed but fully shaven is a subjective preference. It's not the pubic hair that's gross it's the fact that he didn't scratch it through his pocket or something.
TeenTiger 0
Could you tell us the location of your work place so we can all avoid it. Thanks.
zadie 6
This is one of those FMLs that you simply COULD NOT make up!
_Adog2645 24
But #2 didn't type an fml, it was just a comment...
hatarou 0
man thats messed up did anything bad happen
yuhhkno 0
did she notice loll what happendd!?
Panime 0
One day that will be a revered piece of art!
piderman13 0
Its not his fault!!! When it itches, it demands immediate attention!! I say if anyone got mad at OP then screw them! Honestly, the golden pocket coins come first
Lexi333 0
omg # 5 u made my fukn day. ur too hilarious
Dunebuggy569 5
#5, you probably have alot of pissed off crazy ex-girlfriends from you scratching your balls in public with them don't you?
Dear_Karma 27
Ya but he didn't have to stick his hands down his pants to do it!
sforward09 0
hahahahaha thats ******* hilarious... but discusting at the same yime... you shouldnt have scratched your nuts next to the machine
SFemily 0
That is horribly gross!
acertijo 0
hahahaha awesomely gross XD
VerticalOrbit 0
Ok, so, you put your hand IN YOUR PANTS? I'm not a guy, but most guys I've seen that get an itch, usually don't put their hand in their pants. You're doing it wrong.
t3a 0
truth, what kinda gross Weirdo shoves his hand in his pants and palms his balls
Poepiepiesie 3
I indeed mostly use my tongue to get rid of ballsack itches.
nexismyname 0
181 I rofld hard hahaha
Savvy89 0
hahahahaha, tell her that is how the photo was when you recieved it, you noticed it at first but just thought the woman had a large cheek hair. that should work =p Pictures are Worth 1000 words and A Pubicle