Today, my college started an internet "confessions" page. Out of curiosity I checked it out, only to find that it's full of some of the most disturbing stuff I've ever read. My schoolmates are either filthy as fuck or they are all pathological liars. Wonderful. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I checked out a "confessions" page for my university. The first confession was from a guy who whacked off in a campus restroom then used a computer in a lab without washing his hands. I work in that lab. FML
Today, at college, I walked in on some kid jerking off in front of the bathroom sink. This place never ceases to amaze and disgust me. FML
Today, my mom found a book of dirty stories I'd written in tenth grade. She then told me that I wrote about things she'd never even thought about, and she's been having sex for years. If that wasn't bad enough, she's taken them in to work to show people. FML
Today, I saw in my browser history a profile from one of those "Facebook of sex" websites. Turns out that my boyfriend has been posting naked pictures of himself on there using my laptop and flirting with teenage girls. His excuse? "I have friends on there." FML
Today, I found out that the “stranger” I’ve been confessing my kinky, dark, and disgusting fantasies to online is a friend from high school, who figured out it was me by the third sentence. Now I'm praying she has a heart. FML
Today, while on my Dad's computer, I looked through the browser history to find the name of a website I'd visited on it the other day. I soon found out he watches a staggering amount of downright frightening incest porn. I'm disturbed on so many levels. FML
Today, I made a new friend at my college campus, which was great, until I added him on Facebook and he started liking posts from 3 years ago, asking if he could be my "dirty little secret" because he knows that I have a boyfriend. FML
Today, I wrote a Facebook post venting about the horrible things I've been going through lately, hoping my friends would console me. I discovered that my English teacher from 30 years ago, the creepy dude who keeps asking me out, and some random chick I don't even know are my only "friends." FML
Today, my so-called friend snitched to the teachers that I was the admin of the school confessions page and I got scolded after school. FML
Today, I stumbled upon a few of my former uni classmates’ social media profiles, all sharing anti-bullying posts and adding sad comments. Really thoughtful of them, if you ignore the fact that these same classmates bullied me relentlessly during my college years, causing me to take antidepressants daily. FML
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Top comments
Checker 20
I'm curious as to what they said...
Paco_el_Taco 17
There is a time and place for everything. Its called college.
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Comments (117)
perdix 31
You forgot the third option: pathetic attention-seekers. No one has really done an Alabama Hot Pocket, and if you don't know what that is, don't look it up.
BostonPLD33 6
I'm gonna go look it up.
perdix 31
#23, you'll be sorry.
BostonPLD33 6
Lol, wow. The things people come up with.
perdix 31
#28, so, in retrospect, do you feel that acquiring this knowledge made you a better person or a worse person? Frankly, I feel that knowing what an Alabama Hot Pocket is has made me a lesser person compared to when I was ignorant of that maneuver.
AcieMcG 21
Oh god I was eating my breakfast O.o
asb818 14
Perdix, these people will never learn. Someone always falls for your trap and lets curiosity get the best of them.
BostonPLD33 6
I suppose knowledge is power, the more the better. I could always use it in a verbal argument. Anything else you'd like to teach us all?
perdix 31
#57, there are a couple more in one of my comments on the home-schooled Facebook story. Find them at your peril!
EvilUndead 9
47, It doesn't really matter what you KNOW, what matters is what you do with that knowledge. This is because people are defined by their actions and because you can't really control what kind of knowledge you acquire - by accident you can always find/learn something horrifying or disgusting, and you won't be able to forget it even if you want.
doritowhore 9
Always back to the urban dictionary terminology, it seems.
Merylwen 24
I choose to remain ignorant on the subject. Whatever you're talking about sounds like something traumatising enough.
copo37 7
I don't really see how this affects you. So what if random people have done things and its been posted. As for "school mates" unless you go to a small private college I doubt you will meet 10% of the people that have posted anyways.
Instagrants 8
Why does it matter what they're doing? If you don't like it, don't get involved. It's that simple. It doesn't have to affect you unless you allow it to.
Missy2612 11
it's college students... what did you expect?
perdix 31
#17, Correct capitalization and noun-verb agreement?
HowieDoIt 21
This one time in band camp...
whY402Jay 12
You would be surprised how nasty people are behind closed doors.
Feveryoneslife13 11
We're either at the same college, OP, or quite a few colleges are like that
carlistar27 10
Texas State?
TheDrifter 24
UCLA?
HairyPunisher 27
Not to sound like a dick but is this REALLY an fml? Sounds more like OP is a bit prude.
fksfsdhfsdfh 26
That pretty sums up life!
janelly16 7
Hahaha your school wishes they could be like like the UW Madison page. Go Badgers!