Today, I went to check my mail but there was a guy standing at the mailbox. I said, "Hey, get the fuck away from there." It was the mailman. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, on my first day at my new job delivering mail, I was yelled at by a guy, who threatened to shoot me if I "trespassed" on his property. He made me toss his mail toward his porch from the street, before telling me to get lost. FML
Today, I woke up feeling great. I opened up the blinds and looked out from my window just in time to see a man ripping my mailbox from the ground and sprinting away with it. FML
Today, I witnessed a postal worker with an important parcel stopping before knocking on my door, shrugging, getting back in his van, and driving away. I couldn't get the door open quickly enough before he left. FML
Today, the mailman delivered my new phone to my neighbour's house. This was okay, because he left a note in my mailbox informing me so. Now my crazy neighbour won't give me the package because, "*I* signed for it!" FML
Today, I was home alone. I didn't expect anyone to be anywhere near home, so when I got out of the shower, I walked to the living room, naked, to get the tv remote for my room. Only to find the UPS guy standing at our glass front door. I screamed... so did he. FML
Today, I watched as my neighbor walked to my front lawn, looked me right in the eye, and pissed on my mailbox. FML
Today, I was home alone tanning in my backyard which is fairly secluded. I took my top off and laid there for awhile before I looked over and saw the UPS guy standing at my gate with a package because nobody answered the door. I looked horrified and he said not to worry, he'd seen better. FML
Today, I awoke to banging at my door. It was my neighbor, accusing me of stealing her mail to spy on her, because apparently she thinks I must be some sort of secret agent. The cops don't believe me when I call, and she won't go away. FML
Today, I was doing weird voice impressions for my friend right before the doorbell rang and I had the front window open. The postman looked at me strangely, handed me my parcel and didn't say a word. FML
Today, a guy asked for my number at the grocery store, but I politely told him I wasn't interested. He followed me home and took a shit on my doorstep. FML
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Top comments
SirEnigM0nk 22
Damn, you're lucky he didn't go postal on you.
RichardPencil 32
The uniform and mailbag didn't make you think before you opened your big mouth? Or was this some sort of shady undercover incognito mail delivery?
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Comments (5)
RichardPencil 32
The uniform and mailbag didn't make you think before you opened your big mouth? Or was this some sort of shady undercover incognito mail delivery?
SirEnigM0nk 22
Damn, you're lucky he didn't go postal on you.
Taurus_ChicKa 37
As someone who works at an office that relies on the post office to deliver our products to our customers, I'm going to assume that the mailman was a substitute/new carrier, and OP didn't recognize him. But still, you'd think he'd have a uniform or at least a mail bag with him. But then again, these sub carriers are awful and half the time misdeliver things if they deliver them at all, so who knows.
BurnInDemonFire 39
Did he not have a uniform on?
Nhayaa2.0 17
Well maybe you should work on your obvious lack of politeness. No need to be rude, you could have just asked him to move, nicely.