Today, after ordering pizza, I heard some strange noises coming from my basement so I called the cops. The pizza came fifteen minutes before the cops. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I ordered a pizza online to be delivered to my apartment. After an hour of waiting, I called the pizza place to ask what the problem was. Apparently, the people at the apartment below me took my already paid for pizza and ate it. FML
Today, we ordered pizza. A long wait and several phone calls later, we found out that someone met the delivery person at the end of our driveway, signed our receipt, and stole our pizza. Way to check the credit card pizza people. FML
Today, I felt like cheating on my diet and ordered a pizza. My mom and my sister were napping, so I put in the delivery notes, “Please don’t knock.” The delivery guy knocked anyway. LOUD. My mom and sister got up and saw everything. FML
Today, I was waiting for my pizza delivery, which I had foolishly chosen to arrive at 5pm in the middle of rush hour. The pizza was roughly 30 minutes late due to this and I was so happy to get my pizza, I tried to help get the pizza out of the warming bag and somehow caused the delivery guy to drop his smartphone. FML
Today, I was delivering a pizza but I got the address wrong. When I got to the house, I was surrounded by police and put in handcuffs at the door. Turns out the wrong address I went to resulted in me interfering with some sort of sting operation. FML
Today, I ordered pizza for myself. When the delivery guy arrived, I opened the door in pajama pants, messy hair and a face mask. He smiled and said, “Oh, this order says ‘Family Combo Meal.’ Where’s everyone else?” I just said, “They’re busy.” They weren’t. FML
Today, I was starving and ordered pizza. They said it would take 30 minutes. When it arrived an hour later, I was so hangry, I didn’t even wait for the delivery guy to leave. I grabbed the pizza box, ripped it open, and immediately dropped it face-down onto the ground. I ended up eating a slice of cold, dirt-covered pizza like a sad, defeated animal. FML
Today, I'm getting over a nasty breakup, and decided to treat myself and order a pizza online. After waiting 45 minutes, I checked the site. Turns out, I'd forgotten to change the address on the site. I sent my ex a free pizza. FML
Today, I opened the door to a pizza delivery guy. I hadn't order any, but I thought maybe my roommate had. As he handed me the box, I said, "Thanks, you too" when he told me to enjoy my meal. He stopped, looked confused, and said, "Wait, what?" before leaving. I then realized my roommate was out of town and I’d just taken someone else’s pizza. FML
Today, I was home alone in the dark and I heard the doorbell ring. I didn't know who it was so I didn't answer. They kept ringing, so I got a bit scared and called the police. When the police showed up, they told me it was a Chinese delivery guy with the wrong address. FML
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Top comments
Aim4thebullseye 4
Shit you got pizza why you mad?
cumverg 0
The joke is old, grandpa
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Comments (138)
ImAbsolutelyDone 0
Of Course Pennsylvania
nadyy14 8
:)
Keyman1212 14
Let's hope that the cops didn't have anything important going on, because "strange noises" is pretty low on the totem pole of importantness. Just made that word up. **** yeah.
chiddy_bang71 0
success kid: make up word on fml, comment gets thumbed up 11 times. **** yeah.
Googoo27 12
make that 13 times... :O
gamegeek42 6
should of just grabbed your gun!
Stupend0us 7
Assuming OP has one. But this is also 1 reason I own a gun. The cops can never get there as fast as you can get you're gun.
Tadeusz_fml 5
The likeliness of someone actually being in his cellar is not really high enough to justify 13,500 murders a year through firearms, but if they wake you feel slightly less paranoid, knock yourself out.
bleedlikeagod 6
guns don't kill people, people kill people. A responsible, armed Citizen is going to have a much better chance of defending himself if he has a firearm. And if guns were illegal I can guarantee you that the criminals are still gonna find ways to get them.
BkkMan13 0
check the basement BEFORE you call the cops dumbass!
Futacy 30
If he would of checked the basement and found a creepy guy there then he would've been shot before he could get to the phone, dumbass! And that's not even the point.
dgr8ing 0
It's retarded that someone would just call the cops, wait, I just herd a drop! I GOTTA CALL THE COPS!!!! only a moron wouldn't check.
BkkMan13 0
HOLY JEEBUS!!!
calebobadiah 0
luv dee pic mon.
nadyy14 8
why didn't you just check?
ceddyz17 10
they followed the aroma
SemperFi1019 0
That sounds like the Jacksonville, NC cops. My boyfriend and I had someone sneak into our apartment and take our laptop while we were upstairs. We called the cops as soon as we found out and it took them easily 30-40 minutes to get there.
a_nutritionist 10
...yeah and? the person was gone. why would they prioritise that report? of course they took a long time, when the entire thing was over anyway. there are higher priorities than "someone took my shit while i was out".
TamMeJean 3
those cops do suck. I hated having to deal with them when I lived there.
alexxss_fml 10
see they knew you ordered pizza instead of doughnuts. paybacks a bitch.
transilvanianson 3
he didn't check because he's not an idiot like you see on tv now-a-days
hannahtaskey 9
This FML wasn't to get people to tell you that you shouldn't have called the cops, it was to show how much time cops take to answer a call.