Work, Illness, Poopoo peepee and Capitalism: Pee is stored in the balls

Pee is stored in the balls

By Anonymous - 18/09/2021 02:01 - Belgium - Lint

Today, I learned two things: first, that a bladder infection may spread to your testicles, and second, that the first does not excuse you from work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 044

You deserved it 99

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Same thing different taste

By PissyPuss - 10/12/2015 21:38 - United States

Today, the bladder infection I thought I was over flared up at work, causing me to piss myself, despite having gone twice in the previous hour. I still had to finish my shift, soaked pants and all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 878

You deserved it 1 857

By Duchess - 20/01/2017 12:00

Today, I found out I have a yeast infection, a bladder infection, and a urinary tract infection all at the same time. Oh, and I also have the flu. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 513

You deserved it 718

J'ACCUSE!

By hurtswhenipee3 - 11/01/2023 16:00

Today, I got a urinary tract infection. I didn’t realize men could get those. Worse yet, my girlfriend thinks it’s an STI because, “IF I’M NOT FUCKING YOU, SOMEONE MUST BE!” FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 108

You deserved it 212

By Anonymous - 16/12/2011 14:25 - United States

Today, I went to the doctor's thinking I had a UTI. Turns out I have an STD. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 187

You deserved it 40 099

Wrong place, wrong time

By Matthew - 10/03/2021 00:30

Today, I awoke with a swollen, painful testicle. I called the ambulance and went to the hospital. After they'd done an ultrasound, it's a bad infection. My nurse was someone I used to know and had a major crush on. She's responsible for checking my testicle every 20 minutes when she checks my heart rate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 155

You deserved it 132

Are you?

By lxygrl - 20/07/2019 13:07 - United States - Phenix City

Today, I was told I have kidney stones, kidney infections, and a bladder infection and that I have to get admitted into the hospital. I let my boss know, and she replied, "But you're still coming in for your shift tonight, right?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 318

You deserved it 130

Mah bawsac

By Anonymous - 12/07/2014 20:19 - United States - Indianapolis

Today, I accidentally twisted my balls in my own underwear so badly that I had to be hospitalized. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 021

You deserved it 8 045

Surprise!

By Anonymous - 12/02/2011 18:40 - United States

Today, I went in to the doctor's thinking I had a bladder infection. I walked out knowing I'm pregnant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 343

You deserved it 16 689

By crushed dreams - 16/06/2011 06:20 - United States

Today, I went from a party where both of my girlfriends decided to show, to a hospital bed with no girlfriends and a painful left testicle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 530

You deserved it 244 083

By Darth Spasticus - 14/11/2015 09:12 - United States - Flower Mound

Today, my boyfriend was diagnosed with a UTI. He thought men can only get UTIs by "catching" them from a woman, so he blamed me for it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 696

You deserved it 1 769

RichardPencil 30

Saturday 18 September 2021 3:05

Third, testicular self-massage at work is a career-limiting move.

Marcella1016 31

Saturday 18 September 2021 5:09

Or career-enhancing, depending on what your boss is into...

Comments

RichardPencil 30

Saturday 18 September 2021 3:05

Third, testicular self-massage at work is a career-limiting move.

Marcella1016 31

Saturday 18 September 2021 5:09

Or career-enhancing, depending on what your boss is into...

Wadlaen 23

Saturday 18 September 2021 22:37

But does the latter excuse you from work?🤔

Keywords

Poopoo peepee Love Embarrassing Miscellaneous Romantic Christmas Break-ups Annoying Money Gross Argument Ironic Awkward Friends Cute Haircut Lonely Holidays Relatable Work Bosses Capitalism Cars You're fired Covid Health Cheating Jealousy Parenting Kids

The Top

Today, at work at an OB office, I heard a ruckus in the hallway before a very large woman burst into my room and tried to attack my very pregnant patient. Crazy lady is the wife of the pregnant lady’s baby daddy, who is nowhere to be found. I don’t get paid enough for this shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 499

You deserved it 64

Today, I attended a cooking class with my co-workers. As the chef prepared to cut up a load of onions for his dish, he warned us to be ready for the "typical reactions". Everyone teared up. Meanwhile, I popped a boner. So much for typical. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 318

You deserved it 9 464

The Top

Today, my girlfriend told me she wanted to spice up our sex life, so we went and had sex in the park. We had 30 minutes of "spice", just to spend seven hours in jail. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 292

You deserved it 50 980

Today, thinking I was alone in my house, I went downstairs in my underwear, singing at the top of my voice. I strutted into the kitchen to find two middle-aged men I'd never seen before sat at the kitchen table, drinking coffee. Turns out they will be painting our house for the next two weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 490

You deserved it 4 496

Today, it was my first day of school as a freshman. I soon became lost so I asked a senior for directions to my class. They smiled at me and said, "It's on the third floor to the right." After ten minutes of walking up and down stairs and hallways, I discovered there is no third floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 535

You deserved it 20 966

Today, I learned my neighbor can access my wireless printer from his house after it started printing off pictures of what I'm assuming is his penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 129

You deserved it 7 726

Today, after I fired a guy two weeks ago for being a lazy ass, I'd put his job out for applicants to apply, I was going to have the interviews. My assistant informed me only one person applied. It was him, applying to get his job back. I had to rehire him because the position needed filling today. FML

I agree, your life sucks 183

You deserved it 531

Today, I tripped and fell, damaging my sternum and making it incredibly painful to breathe in or out too much. About ten minutes later, I got the hiccups. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 066

You deserved it 3 266