Work, Illness, Poopoo peepee and Capitalism: Pee is stored in the balls

Pee is stored in the balls

By Anonymous - 18/09/2021 02:01 - Belgium - Lint

Today, I learned two things: first, that a bladder infection may spread to your testicles, and second, that the first does not excuse you from work. FML

agreeclassic 1 069

vote type 1 105

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By PissyPuss - 10/12/2015 21:38 - United States

Today, the bladder infection I thought I was over flared up at work, causing me to piss myself, despite having gone twice in the previous hour. I still had to finish my shift, soaked pants and all. FML

agreeclassic 23 894

vote type 1 1 861

By Duchess - 20/01/2017 12:00

Today, I found out I have a yeast infection, a bladder infection, and a urinary tract infection all at the same time. Oh, and I also have the flu. FML

agreeclassic 7 532

vote type 1 724

J'ACCUSE!

By hurtswhenipee3 - 11/01/2023 16:00

Today, I got a urinary tract infection. I didn’t realize men could get those. Worse yet, my girlfriend thinks it’s an STI because, “IF I’M NOT FUCKING YOU, SOMEONE MUST BE!” FML

agreeclassic 1 141

vote type 1 214

By Anonymous - 16/12/2011 14:25 - United States

Today, I went to the doctor's thinking I had a UTI. Turns out I have an STD. FML

agreeclassic 24 213

vote type 1 40 119

Wrong place, wrong time

By Matthew - 10/03/2021 00:30

Today, I awoke with a swollen, painful testicle. I called the ambulance and went to the hospital. After they'd done an ultrasound, it's a bad infection. My nurse was someone I used to know and had a major crush on. She's responsible for checking my testicle every 20 minutes when she checks my heart rate. FML

agreeclassic 1 180

vote type 1 136

Are you?

By lxygrl - 20/07/2019 13:07 - United States - Phenix City

Today, I was told I have kidney stones, kidney infections, and a bladder infection and that I have to get admitted into the hospital. I let my boss know, and she replied, "But you're still coming in for your shift tonight, right?" FML

agreeclassic 2 345

vote type 1 134

Mah bawsac

By Anonymous - 12/07/2014 20:19 - United States - Indianapolis

Today, I accidentally twisted my balls in my own underwear so badly that I had to be hospitalized. FML

agreeclassic 48 042

vote type 1 8 055

Surprise!

By Anonymous - 12/02/2011 18:40 - United States

Today, I went in to the doctor's thinking I had a bladder infection. I walked out knowing I'm pregnant. FML

agreeclassic 32 363

vote type 1 16 694

By crushed dreams - 16/06/2011 06:20 - United States

Today, I went from a party where both of my girlfriends decided to show, to a hospital bed with no girlfriends and a painful left testicle. FML

agreeclassic 18 540

vote type 1 244 195

By Darth Spasticus - 14/11/2015 09:12 - United States - Flower Mound

Today, my boyfriend was diagnosed with a UTI. He thought men can only get UTIs by "catching" them from a woman, so he blamed me for it. FML

agreeclassic 22 719

vote type 1 1 773

RichardPencil 30

Saturday 18 September 2021 3:05

Third, testicular self-massage at work is a career-limiting move.

Marcella1016 31

Saturday 18 September 2021 5:09

Or career-enhancing, depending on what your boss is into...

Comments

RichardPencil 30

Saturday 18 September 2021 3:05

Third, testicular self-massage at work is a career-limiting move.

Marcella1016 31

Saturday 18 September 2021 5:09

Or career-enhancing, depending on what your boss is into...

Wadlaen 23

Saturday 18 September 2021 22:37

But does the latter excuse you from work?🤔

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Today, I asked my dermatologist why my acne has been getting worse, despite following her directions and spending hundreds of dollars on medicine. She just shrugged and told me they can't actually cure my acne. However, they can prescribe me a bunch of stuff and hope one works. FML

agreeclassic 52 238

vote type 1 5 562

Today, I posted my status on Facebook as "slightly hungover." My grandma commented on it with "liar, you were helping me clean last night." She's right. FML

agreeclassic 15 389

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Today, the father of one of my music students asked me out to dinner via my work e-mail. I thought it was kind of sweet, albeit a little strange, until I got his daughter's instrument rental check, with both his and his wife's name printed on it. FML

agreeclassic 8 041

vote type 1 636

Today, for the first time, I hugged the man I have been in love with for four years. It was a congratulatory hug at his wedding to my best friend. FML

agreeclassic 61 954

vote type 1 14 509

Today, It’s the middle of the night and I just watched a Kenny G documentary, and found it absolutely fascinating. FML

agreeclassic 592

vote type 1 271

Today, my mother yet again chose to put my brother's junkie of an ex-girlfriend's needs and happiness above mine, despite the fact that she's stolen thousands of dollars and anything else of value from my mom's house. FML

agreeclassic 1 005

vote type 1 99