Sex, Food and Gross: Hardly surprising

Hardly surprising

By Sad, but true - 02/02/2022 08:01 - Canada

Today, after my girlfriend made a huge dinner, we got frisky. About 15 minutes in, I threw up the dinner she made, all over her. She hasn’t talked to me since. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 243

You deserved it 432

Sex Food Gross

Previous FML Next FML

Add a comment - Reply to : #

You must be logged in to be able to post comments!

Create my account Sign in

Top comments

BurnInDemonFire 33

Wednesday 2 February 2022 14:43

Hi there human who lacks foresight. If you let her throw up a massive dinner on you, you'll be even.

Comments

BurnInDemonFire 33

Wednesday 2 February 2022 14:43

Hi there human who lacks foresight. If you let her throw up a massive dinner on you, you'll be even.

Keywords

Allergies Love Sex Housework Relatable Flowers Weird Cheating Work Parents Kids Awkward Exhausted Sleep Break-ups Death Clothes Bodyshaming Customers AITA Money Health Doctor Vegan Education Intimacy Annoying ACAB Cops Ironic

The Top

Aujourd'hui, notre prof de maths n'a pas réussi à contenir un pet "mitraillette" alors qu'elle écrivait au tableau. Après un grand silence gêné, elle a sorti un paquet de feuilles. "Comme, de toute façon, ça sera dit et répété, interro surprise." VDM

I agree, your life sucks 77 234

You deserved it 6 006

Aujourd'hui, je suis rejoint par un collègue devant les pissotières. J'ai du mal à me détendre lorsqu'il y a quelqu'un à côté et prends donc mon mal en patience. Au bout de quelques secondes, je me rends compte qu'il en est de même pour lui. Grand moment de solitude à deux. VDM

I agree, your life sucks 45 634

You deserved it 3 578

The Top

Today, I realized that because of my past abusive relationship, I will never love anyone fully. In the back of my mind, I will always have a doubt, thinking that they don't want me or that I'm just a goal to achieve until they're ready to leave. It's to the point where I don't see a reason to try; everyone will leave and I'm OK with that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 046

You deserved it 196

Today, a blind guy asked me out, but since I'm already in a relationship I politely declined, saying, "Sorry, I'm already seeing someone." FML

I agree, your life sucks 805

You deserved it 226

Today, my 3-year-old said she wanted “hair like the dog”, so I cut it to about the same length as our pooch’s fur. Now she's crying because she didn’t realize her hair would regardlessly be less fluffy than the dog’s and she therefore ended up with “hair like a boy,” which of course she hates. FML

I agree, your life sucks 568

You deserved it 1 962

Today, my mother was talking about a holiday she went on this time last year. She turned to me to say, "You would've loved it, it's a shame you couldn't come". I was there. It was just the two of us on holiday together. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 871

You deserved it 2 799

Today, my quite squeamish girlfriend came with me to get my latest tattoo. She saw a few drops of blood, screamed in the tattooist's ear, and completely fucked up part of the outline. She had to alter the tattoo drastically to cover up the mess and now it just looks bad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 654

You deserved it 487

Today, I was in school when a guy grabbed my breast, so I swore at him and shoved him away. I got detention and he walked away unpunished. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 809

You deserved it 229