Kids, Food, Creepy and Work: Freaked out - FML

Freaked out

By radioinvader - 28/10/2012 12:29 - Canada - Kingston

Today, my coworker and I were sitting and eating lunch. We noticed a little kid kept staring at us, and every time we looked away he would come a little bit closer. When he was right behind us, I looked and was startled enough to jump. The parents were three tables down, laughing uncontrollably. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 552

You deserved it 3 756

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Same thing different taste

Reported

By maximumpower - 15/03/2009 01:46 - United States

Today, I was eating at a restaurant in town, when a small boy started looking at me. I simply smiled and went back to eating, only to hear out of the corner of my ear, "Daddy, why does that kid's face look like that"? He said it so loud, the three tables next to us turned and looked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 151

You deserved it 3 521

By FailureAtLife121 - 27/06/2009 03:44 - United States

Today, I was at Disneyland with some of my friends. While eating lunch, we watched a small child get frightened by the person dressed as Mickey Mouse. We all burst out laughing only to be jumped by Chip and Dale. Apparently I scream louder than the little kid. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 143

You deserved it 52 241

By Anonymous - 15/12/2010 05:42 - United States

Today, my toddler stood up in a shopping cart and fell, giving himself a black eye. Later, while at a restaurant, he tried to stand up in his high-chair. I quickly blurted out, "Sit down! Do you want another one of those?" while pointing at his eye. The waiter wouldn’t stop glaring at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 371

You deserved it 10 695

By Anonymous - 01/10/2013 16:36 - United States - El Cajon

Today, a coworker at school yelled at one of our students to be quiet. The kid got pretty upset, so I went to comfort him. He held my hand for the rest of the class, telling me in vivid detail how he was going to kill my coworker. Now I'm afraid to look at him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 750

You deserved it 3 626

By oshitdonotwant - 08/08/2009 13:42 - United States

Today, I was having breakfast when my mom's boyfriend came and sat right across from me. He didn't try and hide the fact that he was staring at my chest and told me, "Wow, you're getting bigger." I glared at him. He winked at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 497

You deserved it 4 072

By godhatesme - 26/01/2009 23:14 - United States

Today, at work I got a message from some dude trying to flirt with me. While I was cracking up and making fun of him with my friends, I get a message from him saying look directly behind you, and there he was staring at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 627

You deserved it 36 826

By thatswhatsup66 - 20/03/2012 19:01 - United States - Greer

Today, I was at a restaurant, and I saw my friend. When we made eye contact, I made a creepy face at her and twitched my arms to make her laugh. A woman looked over said sadly, "Oh my God, that poor girl!" She thought I was "special." FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 718

You deserved it 26 935

Mambo number 6

By n/a - 25/11/2009 07:36 - United States

Today, I was working at a children's play centre, and my stomach was twisting and turning. Thinking no one was around, I let out a small fart, only to turn and see a little girl running to her mom, yelling, "Mommy! Mommy! That lady just farted and it sounded like daddy!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 121

You deserved it 27 535

OK Shaggy

By Notakidpusher - 24/11/2015 03:34 - United States - San Francisco

Today, my coworker brought her 3-year-old son to work with her. When introducing him to me, she dropped her bag and bent over to pick it up, knocking him over with her butt in the process. When she stood up, she noticed he was sitting on the ground crying. She then accused me of pushing him over. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 242

You deserved it 1 435

Thanks a bunch

By nose hurts - 30/12/2012 01:01 - United States - Richmond

Today, I was leaning over cleaning a table at work, when my pretty coworker came up behind me and slapped me on the butt. I was so startled that I slipped and smashed my face into the table. Now she can't look at me without laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 636

You deserved it 3 478

Next

Top comments

brohamas16 7

Sunday 28 October 2012 15:51

Hah I'd make my kid do the same thing

Pleonasm 35

Sunday 28 October 2012 15:52

Slenderman: Origins

Comments

Albakuku 0

Sunday 28 October 2012 22:37

Love this!

tsent8 15

Monday 29 October 2012 0:53

Wow Scp containment breach much?

geekpower_fml 28

Monday 29 October 2012 1:12

Was he made out of stone?

P374RD3D 9

Monday 29 October 2012 1:38

And you posted it on FML? Sounds more like creepypasta.

DohIMissed 6

Monday 29 October 2012 1:48

He's just playing "Red light, green light". Have fun!

Pieman1001 1

Monday 29 October 2012 2:05

Soon...

draken555 0

Monday 29 October 2012 2:14

Can't really say ydi, but this is hardly fml.

Unicorn_Toes 4

Monday 29 October 2012 3:47

Slendy in his youngest form.

Liamj774 36

Monday 29 October 2012 4:08

() () ( •_• )

proudpan13 0

Monday 29 October 2012 4:20

Weeping Angels!

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Keywords

Social Media Love Stalker Instagram Phobias Spiders Embarrassing Ironic Animals Bikes Transportation Ecology Health AITA Work Drunk Poopoo peepee Geek Facebook Mysterious Weird Vacation Gamers Video games Gross First Dates Smells Parents Technology Kids

The Top

Today, my husband and I were role playing to keep our marriage alive. His character was a deranged stalker while I was the helpless girl. My neighbor thought I was really being chased so she called the cops. Once they came we explained the whole story and got a fine for disturbing the peace. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 853

You deserved it 7 894

Today, I found out that my toxic mother-in-law's retirement plans include moving in with us when she gets old. The death glares I’m getting from my wife right now are so worth the satisfaction I got from telling that evil old bat I’d burn the house down first before I let her move into it with us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 590

You deserved it 84

The Top

Today, my trunk froze shut with my Christmas presents inside. Since it was still shut, I went to the store. When I came out, some ice had melted and the trunk had popped open. All of my gifts were gone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 820

You deserved it 5 338

Today, I woke up from my honeymoon to discover the love of my life is a bed wetter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 682

You deserved it 9 439

Today, my wife found out my son masturbated and wanted to send him to counseling. Thinking she was overreacting, I told her I masturbated when I was a teen so he should turn out like me. She began sobbing uncontrollably. FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 561

You deserved it 7 280

Today, a notification from Tinder popped up on my girlfriend's phone, saying, "Congratulations, you have a new match." FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 761

You deserved it 2 366

Today, while clearing out my kitchen, I discovered a Tupperware container that'd been forgotten for so long it'd developed its own ecosystem. When I opened it, a funky smell engulfed the kitchen, and I realized I had unintentionally created a new form of life. I promptly closed the container, then put it in the freezer in the hope of killing whatever it is. FML

I agree, your life sucks 93

You deserved it 558

Today, after a particularly difficult late night workout at the gym, I decided to shower in the locker room. I must have passed out, because I later woke up naked, surrounded by police after someone called to report a dead body in the shower. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 628

You deserved it 3 270