Crotch shot

By Rash - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I got kicked in the crotch by a horse in my backyard. I don't own a horse. FML
I agree, your life sucks 39 615
You deserved it 3 304

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Top comments

Horses are mainstream, I ride giraffes.

Sarah Jessica Parker was in your backyard?


ninjuh_wingman 29

I think maybe you should wonder how a horse got in your backyard.

I wouldn't care how it got in, free horse for me FTW!

OP is goin to have trouble having children

tehrealone 6

The OP is a female... I don't understand

The_Troller 14

Who cares how it got there, just be glad you have it. Free dinner for weeks!

Damn_Hippster 11

Well if you are ever talking to a sexual predator on the internet make sure you say that you own a horse!

A good supply of glue to be had for all your arts and crafts projects!

1- Unless he's too busy writhing in pain, of course.

AdamBasebal69 0

That's why you don't try to Walk Like Berney in front of a horse.

chillyCholo 5

Kick it in it's crotch

hoodasswhitekid 0

I ride a kukaroo.

@42: Yes, because the fact that females don't have genitals rolling around majestically in that area means they're immune to getting hit by horses. "Today, a gorilla punched me in my chest while I was sunbathing in my pool. FML." 'What?! I don't get it. I thought OP was a male.'

Hangover 3?

Horses are mainstream, I ride giraffes.

CuteDumBlonde64 11

*Hipster Alert*

nixter5 18

I used to to ride horses, but then I took an arrow to--fuck it, I'm getting so tired of this.

flockz 19

"save a horse, ride a flockz!!" what you guys never heard that song before? it's underground so you guys should like it.

The_Troller 14

I ride a rhinocerous around. Problem?

Please refrain from over-used skyrim guard quotes. Thank you.

It has nothing to do with the post but I love classic rock also!!!!

skeezle 0

Giraffes wouldn't even exist if Chuck Norris didn't uppercut a horse.

CoolRainbowdash 15

I ride zebras

DKjazz 20

I ate pizza before it was cool..

I ride your mom, sorry I just had to do it, that's what said said , damn it I can't help it

bitchslapped22 14

I rode to town on an ass.... Yo momma's ass! *BLACK JESUS*

Haha nice yo What do you do on a giraffe anyways

I ride anything I can find, and I mean ANYTHING.

124- even your mom? Jkjk I'm not that mean

Save a horse; ride a bitch.

GalicZ0ul 0

I ride charzards ;D

alissabetancourt 0

Save a horse , Ride a cowboy.

I ride a flying puple hippo which wears a top hat, poops rainbows as it flies and vomits cartoon hearts upon my enemies

Sarah Jessica Parker was in your backyard?

bobbycorwen 5

Transvestite Donkey Witch.

MaskingTape 2

I thought that exact thought.

bobbycorwen 5

No one likes South Park.

33- most people would disagree with that statement.

bobbycorwen 5

75 - Apparently not. I was thumbed down for my quote from South Park and the other comment was sarcasm. 78 - For quoting South Park?

FMLucky 5

Hahahahhahaha I wish you were my best friend

It was family guy!

biasedshooter 24

I think the horse owned you

"hey look a horse" *cunt punt*

DarkHelmet 10

More than owned that horse made him its bitch

cutielilangel 8

...and that's where my horse went.

marpay 11

Horses can be seriously evil. They look all pretty and kind; but then when you least expect it they kick you or buck you right off their back.

If someone hopped on my back and expected me to give them a ride I would knock them off too. :P

It's just like us men, we let you ride us maybe once or twice .... But more than that we'll just boot ya off and out the door : )

KiddNYC1O 20

Then stop surprising them, #6.

markrs 0

30: if someone hopped on my back and wanted to ride me... ;p

48, you have rules for girls that ride? You tool. That just shows that you're lying. I doubt you're too good looking for that.

I think OP was lucky not to be a guy...would have resulted in broken "equipment".

Thats not true! They CAN be but they r not usually! Some r mean cuz they have had bad experiences with ppl or have been abused!! >:(

Did u tell the horse u were bigger and then proved it? I heard a joke like that somewhere.

OP is a girl. :)

ashleytwinkle 0

Your stupid..

The pot is calling the kettle black. You're stupid.

supercrack11 1

It's kinda long but I know what your talking snot ifs funny

51 is the reason why facepalms were invented.

Babyseal420 7

Could be worse. You could have been a guy.

marpay 11

Getting kicked in the crouch hurts for women as well.

Babyseal420 7

I don't doubt it. Being kicked by a horse anywhere would hurt, I'm just trying to make OP feel better. *hands OP ice pack*

KiddNYC1O 20

It could hurt for women as well but he said it could be worse if op were a guy. I'm sure it hurts more getting dropped kicked on the sack.

58- it might hurt you but for me it feels like the worlds going to end

You're acting like it wouldve been better if it were your own horse...

I know from experience showing and raising steers, that whether it be a horse, a steer or a calf.. it still hurts like hell, hurts guys more than if a girl got kicked in the crouch. Not saying it wouldn't hurt a girl, jus that it would hurt guys more.

I bet that's true

It's the cute little calves you gotta worry about, they are full of energy!

The_Troller 14

I've been kicked in the knee once. Not fun. I feel sympathy either way, because even if it's not in the crotch it still hurts like a bitch.

Jason199615 0

Go back and give it a carrot?