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notacreeper This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff

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Today, I told my mother I have a girlfriend. Her first answer was, "Does she know?" FML

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Halloween

A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.

Top comments

Your hand doesn't count as a girlfriend.

well does she know?

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Comments (151)

Your hand doesn't count as a girlfriend.

Palma Handerson

or his sock. haha #12

Rosie Palms.. doesn't count either

John Handcock is also not a girlfriend.

jack hoffman either.

ZoroFresh 0

Make sure you tell Tina to perm her ******' weave bro

***** baggins

***** baggins

Your hand only counts if you give it a meal beforehand.

is this true? my fleece blanket still counts right?

BIGbadBRIZZLE 0

Susie Palmer doesn't count either. and her five Friends don't make an orgy

lindsay lohand?

lovelydrop 0

well that's rude

Manuella

BlackOpsPWNR 0

lmao!, win for mom!

You gotta Hand it to Palmela for that one! See what I did ther..aw **** it I'm not even gonna try.

bilbo (isnt) baggins

GuessWhatKids 13

How can someone have an answer in the form of a question when the previous statement wasn't a question? Amazed no one noticed

^ It's funny because he's referring to sex.

sssshhhhhhh

iDontDeserveItAt 0

HAHA!!!

WOODYfromthaBAY 0

you have a girlfriend. stop whining.

giantsfan2010 23

He's not whining.

WOODYfromthaBAY 0

all i said was "u have a gf, stop whining". why did that get moderated? every comment from me gets moderated? wtf

You got moderated because your comment was ******* stupid. Stop whining.

Because it's hateful, idk, and it's probably not too smart to repost it.

She was probably talking about your other girlfriend you pimp daddy!

Oh yeah, OP is a playa.

i applaude your optimism

I second that applaud you sir

I'm sorry about that "you sir" shouldn't be there I ate a jellyfish earlier

Did it taste like chicken?

Who cares about his/her mums opinion anyway?

ImaWiseGuy 5

that's the only opinion that matters.....

k when yu get older you're going to regret saying that. Watch when yu get older yu'll be thinking " I shoulda listened to her." when yu get older you're gonna wanna be with her (NOT in that way /: ) so yur a douchebag , goodbye.

maxsport8 1

says the girl with the Justin Beiber pic :p just ****** with ya

well does she know?

ToxixShots 0

doubt it

ha! lol that's what I was thinking!!! ヾ(@⌒ー⌒@)ノ

ImaWiseGuy 5

haha, she must have some kind of reasoning behind her question.....

haha this weirdo guy that likes me (he's two years older) used to like this other girl I know. he told everyone EXCEPT her including his parents and her best friend they were going out. NOBODY likes this kid and he never even asked her out. that's one reason for justification.

SystemofaBlink41 27

That's great! OMG!!!!1!!!1

Your alias of "notacreeper" would suggest that you, in fact, ARE a creeper.

zendaddy0 0

#9 thatssssssssssss right

lmao. truth.

Lol nice Minecraft reference!

yez i agree

103 from afar it looks like you got **** on you...

Haha well you have one and that's what really counts right haha :P

Hahaha Thats Kinda Sad That Your Own Mom Doesnt Think You Can Get A Girlfriend

... Any reason for your capitalization patterns or are you just "special"?

ICaughtFire 4

I'll put my money on special.

I CANNOT stand people who do that. It drives me nuts!

you_freak 7

^^ Agreed!

KiddNYC1O 22

I read with a pause for every capitalization. lol

Where do people get it in their heads that they need to capitalize every word??

SofaKingFast 0

sometimes there will Be a special code In the texT that Can be read when you combine the capital letters to form a word. but perHaps the writer was just trying to be my code?

oops, my bad... my attention drove off, the bus passed near a Kindergarden

bitchmode 0

Lol at 74's COde! In faCt, is mine oK?

itsmissjox3 0

Honestly, if that's how this generation chooses to type, I'd prefer it over my generation of tYpInG lYk DiS. Just saying.

74 HTKSTYOMDTYCGAG. yeah. I'm not seeing the code here...

starah_fml 0

that's just her abnormal DNA code

no that's just funny.

Guess Who I Am! I Hate The Fact I Am Doing This. It is really annoying how people do this. :l

tearsXwillXfall 2

or put their birthdate as 69

Well, does this said 'girlfriend' know?

hmmm stalker much