Health, Gross, Relatable and Painful: Blow it

Blow it

By Anonymous - 22/10/2021 01:59

Today, I reached to pick out a booger stuck in my nose that had been irritating me, and ended up poking myself in the eye. FML

agreeclassic 339

vote type 1 736

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Too stupid

By Anonymous - 15/02/2020 01:00

Today, I was picking my nose so aggressively that I flicked a booger right into my eye. FML

agreeclassic 484

vote type 1 2 303

By Ahhwtf - 18/08/2009 11:47 - United States

Today, my nose was itchy. As I reached towards it to itch it, I sneezed ridiculously hard. I punched myself in the eye and now it's all purple and puffy. FML

agreeclassic 45 743

vote type 1 9 815

By Anonymous - 12/05/2012 22:09 - Netherlands - Vianen

Today, while at work, I managed to scrape open the inside of my nose with my fingernail, drawing blood in the process. I had to quickly up an explanation for my scream that didn't go: "Well, I was scouting for boogers..." FML

agreeclassic 7 507

vote type 1 24 728

Booger block

By Anonymous - 23/10/2024 19:00 - United Kingdom - Clydebank

Today, I woke up with a really annoying bogey blocking my nose. Eventually, I just covered the other nostril and snorted as hard as I could. Good news, it came flying out. Bad news, it landed in my eye. FML

agreeclassic 209

vote type 1 372

Leave it to the pros

By Anonymous - 05/11/2021 00:01 - United States - Epsom

Today, I was attempting to tame my bushy eyebrows, since I'm starting a new job in a few days and need to look somewhat presentable, when I poked myself in the eye. Hard. I thought I’d blinded myself for a few moments. Now it’s just red, sore and watery. FML

agreeclassic 801

vote type 1 243

By blindedbyOCD - 03/09/2018 01:30

Today, I accidentally poked myself in the left eye. As I sat there in pain, my 9-year-old nephew, who we think has OCD, decided to help out by poking me in the right eye. FML

agreeclassic 2 967

vote type 1 271

By boogerbrain - 09/12/2009 21:06 - United States

Today, I was looking at my wedding pictures I had just ordered and I tried to flick something off one of the pictures, but it wouldn't come off. In a panic I quickly looked through all of my pictures and realized that I had a booger sticking out of my nose. No one told me. FML

agreeclassic 38 154

vote type 1 4 194

Scratch that

By Anonymous - 09/01/2022 07:59 - Germany

Today, I got a painful scratch on my nose. Nasty kitty? Nope. I never imagined a dried booger stuck in my handkerchief could be this hard and this sharp. FML

agreeclassic 870

vote type 1 315

Goo

By Anonymous - 22/09/2025 00:00

Today, I was washing my face and I started rinsing the soap off my face with my eyes closed when I felt something gooey on my face. I opened my eyes to realize I had been rubbing snot on my face from when water got up my nose and apparently snot came down with it. FML

agreeclassic 247

vote type 1 112

What's more embarrassing?

By Anonymous - 03/02/2021 18:30 - United States - Pittsburgh

Today, I pulled out an annoying nose hair with a tweezer and it made me cry. Not particularly painful but it triggered the tear duct. Had to pretend it was from yawning when someone asked why the teary eye. FML

agreeclassic 652

vote type 1 237

RichardPencil 30

Friday 22 October 2021 2:39

That snot good. Are your nostrils tiny, or do you look like a Picasso?

Comments

RichardPencil 30

Friday 22 October 2021 2:39

That snot good. Are your nostrils tiny, or do you look like a Picasso?

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Today, my puppy came into my room, and I cupped his head in my hands and bent down to kiss him. As I did, I realized that the part of his head I was kissing was covered in his own shit that he'd seemingly been rolling in. FML

agreeclassic 47 510

vote type 1 15 117

Today, as a lifelong insomnia sufferer, I was having an awful night. After tossing and turning in my bed for several hours, I decided to try sleeping on the couch. Not only did I finally fall asleep, I was having one of the best dreams of my life… Until my neighbor’s brat had a tantrum at 6 a.m. FML

agreeclassic 997

vote type 1 103

Today, my best female friend sent me a nude to make sure it looked good before she sent it to the guy she likes. FML

agreeclassic 2 892

vote type 1 542

Today, I felt bad about rarely complimenting my mom about her cooking, so during dinner, I raved about her incredible, creamy, macaroni and cheese. It came from a box. FML

agreeclassic 30 142

vote type 1 8 263

Today, I was emailed an update on the jobs I applied for. Every single one of the positions have closed except for one that I'm having second thoughts about, because looking around Google showed them to be VERY sketchy. FML

agreeclassic 390

vote type 1 73

Today, I gave my best speech at a work function, only to have the entire team ask, “What was the point of that?” Now, I’m questioning all my life choices. FML

agreeclassic 341

vote type 1 141