Today, my guy friend told me he wanted to try being with another guy. I told him I’d help him anyway I could. Who knew his “help” was him wanting me (a woman) to help him get hard since he couldn’t get it up for the guy? Guess not letting him grope me or jerk him off meant I’m unsupportive. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, after getting sick of my boyfriend pestering me for a threesome, I invited a male friend over. My boyfriend strongly declined, because, "Hell no, I ain’t gay." So this man expects me to be a lesbian, but him being gay is a problem. FML
Today, I asked my best male friend to help repair my car because it broke down. He responded, “Why don’t you ask the lovely guy you’re dating instead, since obviously he’s better than me?” Apparently he’s still upset I didn’t reciprocate his romantic feelings and chose someone else. FML
Today, my boyfriend came out as a polyamorous, and then immediately asked me if he could date another guy I thought was my friend. I’m such a pushover, I said yes. FML
Today, I found out that yet another of my guy friends liked me. I then posted on social media that I just wanted a guy friend that had absolutely no romantic feelings for me. My crush volunteered. FML
Today, I told my guy friend to not put pictures of me on his story when we hang out, to which he replied, “You rejected me, but you continue to ask about my friends. For some reason you refuse to help me out with yours. At least some other girl I know will think I’m a catch for hanging with you.” FML
Today, I told my man that I would love to have sex, provided that he helped me “warm up” enough to actually be able to enjoy it. His reply? "Well, never mind, if you’re not in the mood." FML
Today, my virgin guy friend told me he wanted me to be his first. I'm a guy. FML
Today, I found out why the guy I like insisted on inviting a friend along on our outings. Apparently, he was sick of me flirting/making moves, so he kept bringing her along in hopes I'd get the hint. Although this time, not only was I third-wheeling, but I watched as they hooked up in the backseat of his car. FML
Today, my boyfriend is spending a lot of time hyping up his female best friend who is participating in a modeling competition, trying to get her to win. When I asked this guy to help support my small business, he said he, “didn’t have time” to. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I broke up. I was pretty upset, so one of my guy friends offered to comfort me and get some ice cream. Apparently his definition of "comforting" is to feel my tits and try to get me to give him head. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Sdog 6
Maybe it’s just a ploy to get with you. Strange setup, but if it works it works.
Razath 17
That's why you ask, "How can I help?" instead of saying you'll help someone "anyway you can". People (too often) will take advantage of you if they can.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (6)
RichardPencil 32
If you were a true ally, you'd be his fluff girl.
Razath 17
That's why you ask, "How can I help?" instead of saying you'll help someone "anyway you can". People (too often) will take advantage of you if they can.
Sdog 6
Maybe it’s just a ploy to get with you. Strange setup, but if it works it works.
Brightside86 31
When being an "ally" involves more than you expected...
Justkidding100 41
just for fun? like what is the point? using your gay buddy to weirdly wingman just to get a hand job? also newsflash only 1 guy technically needs to be hard. be a man and bottom!