Today, I asked a co-worker if he'd cover for me while I slipped out to cash some money at the bank. When I got back, I found out that when he said "yeah, sure" he actually meant "yeah, sure, I'll tell the boss and get your dumb arse suspended". FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boss called on my day off and told me to come to work. She neglected to tell me that it was simply to give me my recent paycheck after it got lost, but then she said, "Since you showed up in uniform, you might as well clock in for today. The new guy no-showed again." FML
Today, I called into work because of a family emergency. My boss was understanding; my coworker? He tore me a new one because his wife wanted him to take the day off, which he didn't because it was going to be a tough day at work. He also threatened to find a way he could get me fired. FML
Today, I was telling my coworker that I was considering quitting the shady, 50-shades-of-scum business we work at. He snitched to our boss, who quickly fired me on bullshit charges of incompetence, theft, and workplace bullying. I guess I'm not getting a good reference from him. FML
Today, I had to go to work on my day off to suspend someone. Afterwards, I got a call saying I can't suspend the person in question because the supervisor who told me to suspend them was wrong. FML
Today, my coworker paid me back the $15 I let him borrow and we shook hands. Later, I was called into my boss's office, where he threatened to fire me for doing a drug deal in front of customers. The police are getting involved. FML
Today, my slacker co-worker accused me of stealing because I got more hours than him. I was called into the manager's office and interrogated. They believed him, and sent me home for the day. I guess it pays off being the boss's kid. FML
Today, my son claimed credit for a money-saving scheme at work that belonged to a colleague. He claimed this to someone in very upper management, but when they tried to ask follow-up questions, he obviously had no idea how to answer, admitted his lie and was sacked on the spot. FML
Today, I gave my boss a gift card as a late birthday present, since I wasn't in the office on his actual birthday. He accused me of trying to bribe my way to a promotion, and suspended me on the spot. FML
Today, my boss called me into his office. After yelling and firing me, his assistant comes in telling him he had mistaken me for someone else. He did not give me my job back, as he claimed it would make an awkward work environment. FML
Today, I learned that asking your boss, “Am I gonna get paid extra?” when he asks that you chip in for your co-worker-who-just quit’s duties is not an appropriate response. In fact, I was written up for “insubordination” and “inability to be a team player.” FML
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Top comments
77777771 12
He could have just said no.
WCARlover 35
Someone's looking for a raise. That sucks
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Comments (90)
77777771 12
He could have just said no.
baddud300 6
Atleast you get a nice vacation:)
morgann4826 0
At least you didn't get fired
KeyboardWarrior 10
He could've also said his dad had 7 nipples.
The_Hitdude 12
^...? I'm surprised, Keyboard Warrior. Your comments are usually quite witty and enjoyable. Having an off day?
prettyboodoll33 2
Yeahh.. At least you didn't get fired:)
WCARlover 35
Someone's looking for a raise. That sucks
The_Troller 14
That raise is probably going to come from OP's salary.
maninthebox11 8
Hahaha ^
prettyboodoll33 2
Thats probably why he told on him, cuz he wanted a raise.
zachherbert 10
Yes 57, this is what everyone was hinting on above you.
goldfishgod 20
prettyboodoll - I kind of doubt anything in your profile is true.
llamafish 25
No. I bet she actually is single.
Jiplo 18
63- Why? It's "completely" logical for a 16 year old to model. In Florida. When she lives in England.
blackheart24 10
Why y'all trollin on 57? Maybe she actually is a model? At least she isn't fueled by beer and horror films and her pic isn't some slutty Sasha Grey shot.
fuckingduh 1
57- No shit Sherlock
Hollandiscrazy 12
That's what you call 'a good friend' Gotta hate the competition going on in companies. Can't we just all be friends?
SkoomaKi 28
If we were all friends, wouldn't that be boring?
RedPillSucks 33
If by boring you mean no wars/conflicts/bitching at each other, then those are the unintresting times that I would like to live in.
googlefrewdnoob 0
Its conflict that makes stuff interesting
SkoomaKi 28
Imagine life if everyone was friends - yes conflicts, wars and hate would stop....but would you really want that? Life is about overcoming fights, getting into new ones and repeating it over. Life wouldn't be worth living without hate and the shit that you get....its what makes you, you!
ladyLALAA 29
I think the world would be a much better place if everyone sat down over tea and scones to talk out their issues.
SkoomaKi 28
42 - you're talking about a perfect world and frankly it'll never happen.
dbt88 15
42- I'm personally not a fan of tea. This idea just can't work.
docscientist 10
As long as there are religious fundamentalists, world peace is out of reach.
ladyLALAA 29
If you don't like tea there's always milkshakes!
Michyxo 14
Ouch. Obviously you shouldn't be doing that, but you'd think a coworker might realize it was for a really important reason if you were leaving work to do so.
Calyx_fml 22
You should have asked your boss. Either that or get a job where doing errands doesn't matter.
HaniahAhmad 0
If he was going to do that he might as well have said no.
immaMonsta 8
Sounds like he has something against you if he went and told your boss on you for something as simple as that. Maybe next time you should wait until your lunch break.
kimgr 9
"yeah, sure" means a lot of different things Maybe you could've asked him what he meant when he said "yeah sure"
Sixers01 0
Actually i think yeah, sure usually means exactly what it sounds like..
KiddNYC1O 22
Another way would be if there were a sarcastic tone in their voice.
immaMonsta 8
Sounds like he has something against you if he went and told your boss on you for something as simple as that. Maybe next time you should wait until your lunch break.
TheEpicMilkMan 13
i have a feeling he just doesn't like you and he wants you gone :3