ningyou_fml

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Ningyou_fml's favorite FMLs

By Explicit - 13/01/2009 18:17 - United States

Today, I had to give a speech in front of my class and during my speech I had to say the words "But six"; however, because of my accent it sounded like "Butt sex". For the remainder of the day I was frequently asked about "Butt sex". FML

agreeclassic 28 530

vote type 1 3 235

By Anonymous - 10/11/2011 07:06 - United States

Today, it was so cold that I had to put slippers over my slippers. FML

agreeclassic 26 635

vote type 1 6 089

By possiblyoverweight - 08/11/2011 14:01 - United Kingdom

Today, my baby son latched onto my nipple for a feed, after a month of having to be bottle fed because he wouldn't latch. This would be fantastic, if it weren't for the fact that I'm his father, not his mother. FML

agreeclassic 44 924

vote type 1 4 395

Man child

By Anonymous - 26/10/2011 23:44 - United States

Today, I was getting intimate with my husband on our anniversary day. He climbed on top of me and firmly placed his penis on my nose. When I asked him what the hell he was doing, he burst into laughter and said I looked just like Squidward. FML

agreeclassic 46 700

vote type 1 5 936

By Anonymous - 16/10/2011 04:22 - United States

Today, I came home to my empty apartment. My girlfriend had left a note on the floor that said: "Took my stuff and left. Took your stuff and pawned it." FML

agreeclassic 42 900

vote type 1 5 298