TheInfamousJosh_fml

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Theinfamousjosh_fml's favorite FMLs

Nice try

By Ma.Sa.La. - 27/02/2009 15:18 - United States

Today, I was walking through the mall with my boyfriend of a year and a half. There was sign outside of the jewelry store that said, "Engagement Rings - No interest for 12 months." I said, "Look, baby! No interest." He replied, "That's right… NO INTEREST." FML

agreeclassic 27 701

vote type 1 50 585

By IhadToTakeCareOfTraumatizedFish - 03/03/2016 05:32 - United States - Iowa Park

Today, while I was working at a sushi restaurant, a guy told me he wanted the table next to the "koi fish tank", because he wanted to let the fish know what happens when they "cross him". FML

agreeclassic 21 659

vote type 1 2 574

Close to the edge

By itssomething - this FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - Netherlands - Utrecht

Today, my closest encounter to having sex in the last four months was getting chlamydia from Russell Brand. In a dream. FML

agreeclassic 21 275

vote type 1 2 823

By sweetie808 - 28/01/2016 08:39 - United States - Kailua Kona

Today, around 12 a.m., my pet parrot said a sentence I've never heard him say before. Usually this would be exciting, but considering he said, 'I killed the bird', and that one of my two love birds mysteriously died a few days ago, it's safe to say I'm now terrified. FML

agreeclassic 26 777

vote type 1 1 792

Flood warning

By Anonymous - 06/01/2016 15:58 - United States - San Francisco

Today, let's just say it's not a good sign when your plumber yells, "What the fuck?!" That is, unless you actually like your kitchen being swamped by sewage. FML

agreeclassic 21 088

vote type 1 1 354