The Top

The most agreed on FMLs The most commented on FMLs The most favorited

The top of the day The top of the week The top of the month The top of the year The all-time greatest FMLs

This is mine now

By K……y - 06/09/2024 16:00 - United States - Atlanta

Today, my new couch was delivered. As the delivery guys left, I came back into the living room and noticed a bad but familiar smell. I turned the couch cushions over to discover that my cat had already claimed it as her personal litter tray. The return policy doesn’t cover "cat defilement." FML

I agree, your life sucks 232

You deserved it 480

Unfair

By Anonymous - 06/04/2026 09:00 - United States

Today, I lost my custody battle and I have to return my grandchildren to my disowned daughter, who was allowing her now ex-husband to abuse them. I can't appeal or anything because frankly we don't have the funds. I wish I'd never had her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 546

You deserved it 93

By anon - 29/08/2012 04:52 - United States - York

Today, I was giving a tour of my boat to a man who seemed interested in purchasing it. Everything was going great. That is, until, the motor stopped running in the middle of the ocean. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 545

You deserved it 3 131

By person123abc - 09/12/2010 05:35 - United States

Today, I sat in my room on the computer instead of attending the party of the year. I got kicked out because I wasn't invited. The party was in my back yard, hosted by my brother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 392

You deserved it 4 165

Rules are for squares

By He's old enough to know better! - 08/09/2024 22:00 - United States

Today, my boss's oldest son challenged me to a chess game. I've been practicing a lot, so I decided to humor him. He was a challenging opponent; not because he was skilled, however, but because he was trying to cheat almost constantly. I felt exasperated, rather than accomplished, when I beat him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 449

You deserved it 74

Cartoonish

By You knock me off my feet - 14/04/2023 03:00 - United States

Today, it's so windy, I actually fell over and nearly flew into the street the moment I walked outside. FML

I agree, your life sucks 651

You deserved it 159

Hogwatch

By What great parents I have - 11/09/2024 00:00 - United States

Today, my parents were watching videos of police officers dealing with stubborn suspects. I overheard my mom saying, "It's like a Christian trying to argue with an atheist about God" and my dad agreed. Good to know that they're still as intolerant as ever, and it will never be safe for me to come out as an atheist. FML

I agree, your life sucks 433

You deserved it 248

Thank you for your service

By Paulalala - 11/09/2024 20:00 - United States - Helena

Today, I was pulled over for speeding. The cop asked if I had a reason for going so fast. I panicked and said, “I have to poop.” He followed me home with lights on, just to make sure I made it. FML.

I agree, your life sucks 124

You deserved it 501

Good girl

By Bento DaCosta - 12/04/2026 22:00 - United States - Arlington Heights

Today, my dog went on a walk for the first time. 90% of the walk was spent removing leaves and grass from her mouth, and she didn't want to go back home. I think she thinks she's a cow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 258

You deserved it 120

Newbie

By Anonymous - 15/04/2026 12:00 - United States - Denver

Today, at my first office job, I tried to casually join a conversation about weekend plans. I said, “Yeah, I love hiking there,” even though I’d never been. Someone asked, “Oh, which trail did you do?” I panicked and said, “The main one?” Turns out there are six, and they all started debating them while I stood there nodding like I belonged. FML

I agree, your life sucks 71

You deserved it 604

Anger management

By Anonymous - 19/04/2026 03:00 - United States

Today, my parents tried to apologize for wrongly grounding me. I told them to go fuck themselves, so now I'm re-grounded. FML

I agree, your life sucks 111

You deserved it 770

Retail work hell

By Sheila2004 - 19/04/2026 22:00 - United Kingdom - Bolton

Today, I greeted a customer with my usual “Hi, how are you?” She started telling me, in detail, about the terrible day she was having, job stress, family issues, everything. I stood there for 10 minutes listening because I didn’t want to be rude. At the end, she sighed, “Thanks, I’m not buying anything today” and left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 379

You deserved it 98

Technologically challenged

By Weirdo - 22/11/2020 08:02

Today, once again, my mom chewed me out for, “playing games on the computer all day.” I’m not playing, it’s 3D modeling, and it’s my job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 166

You deserved it 98

Season 3 claims another victim

By Bless - 24/04/2026 12:00 - United States

Today, I was watching Euphoria’s new season and my mom barged in without knocking to ask me something. At that precise moment, a very explicit sex scene came on. She threw a bitch fit, tore up my prom ticket and told me that I ever lose my virginity while living under her roof, she’ll kick me out of the house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 383

You deserved it 97

Joe Smooth move

By Karel - 24/09/2024 14:00 - Canada

Today, I was at a friend's party and tried to lean casually against a wall while talking to someone. I missed the wall and ended up stumbling backwards into the punch bowl that was atop the coffee table. FML

I agree, your life sucks 230

You deserved it 371

Tetchy

By Be polite - 26/04/2026 20:00 - United States

Today, I greeted every passenger cheerfully getting onto my bus all morning. At one stop, I said, “Good morning!” to someone who didn’t respond, so I repeated it louder… only to realize they were wearing headphones and now passengers were staring at me like I was a pissy Karen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 136

You deserved it 375

Knackered

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I'm being admitted to the hospital for severe exhaustion. Why am I exhausted? For spending 12 hours at the hospital while my sister gave birth. The same hospital I'm being admitted to. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 190

You deserved it 6 132

You tried

By Anonymous - 25/11/2020 23:06 - United States - Albuquerque

Today, I'm in my late thirties, I quit my dream job to go back to school in hopes of providing a better future for my family. All my wife does anymore is bitch about how she has to support the family and do everything. I just found out that my grades aren't good enough to continue my college program. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 126

You deserved it 745

Mild nightmare

By Sara Princess - 01/05/2023 03:00

Today, what should have been a perfect spring picnic, turned into a living nightmare. A salad from Subway was filled with hair. It was in a to go bag and I didn’t feel like going all the way back to the Subway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 672

You deserved it 189

Masterful gambit, sir!

By Patzer - 26/09/2024 06:00 - United States

Today, after a long time spent trying to learn chess as a hobby, I've come to accept that I'm simply destined to never be any good at it. Maybe I'm just a slow learner, but it feels like I've made zero progress since I started, despite doing everything I'm told to do. Time to find another hobby, I say. FML

I agree, your life sucks 313

You deserved it 145

Shifty

By Anonymous - 29/04/2026 09:00 - United Kingdom

Today, after years of effort, I was finally able to open my own full body beauty salon. I’ve been open approximately two hours and I’ve had six genuine customers and three shifty looking dudes trying to ask, without saying the actual words, if we’re one of those rub and tug, happy ending massage parlours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 438

You deserved it 88

Butterfingers

By Anonymous - 30/09/2024 12:00 - United States

Today, I was tasked with taking a photo of my best friend getting engaged. As her boyfriend got down on one knee, I got so nervous that I fumbled the camera. It landed right in the lake. I didn’t get a single picture, and now I owe them a new Canon EOS R10. FML

I agree, your life sucks 173

You deserved it 560

Money pit

By Stephanie - 03/05/2026 20:00 - United States - Vincennes

Today, my car was stolen. They found it and I wish they never had. Full coverage would have paid the car, but instead the repairs cost $1700. My deductible was $2000. It ended up costing me $2000. The people who fixed my ignition broke my remote start. I have to fight to get them to pay for that repair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 399

You deserved it 60

Asshat

By Anonymous - 04/05/2023 06:00 - United States

Today, I woke up with a sore throat and a stuffy nose. As my boss is an asshat who hates allowing sick leave, I thought I could power through it, but halfway through my workday I sneezed so hard that I threw my back out. I had to go home early and now I can't move without pain. FML

I agree, your life sucks 854

You deserved it 152

Thanks for the memories

By How - 02/10/2024 00:00 - United States

Today, I was expecting a package from a few days ago, but it still hadn't arrived. As I was going to work, I found it at my grandma's house. Why didn't my grandma tell me, you ask? She died last year. My package was mistakenly delivered to A DEAD PERSON. FML

I agree, your life sucks 411

You deserved it 124

See the light

By Not interested - 10/05/2026 15:00 - United States - Chicago

Today, my coworker was talking about how he fixed his broken marriage and how his wife adores him. I asked for his advice, since mine has been rough. He started talking about God and Christianity and how religion showed him the path. Uhh... nope, I think I'll stick with things the way they are. FML

I agree, your life sucks 355

You deserved it 319

Sightseeing

By Anonymous - 08/10/2024 16:00 - France - Paris

Today, it's been five days since I finally made it to my dream vacation destination, after months of planning, saving, and dreaming. I got food poisoning within hours of arriving and I've spent the last five days in my hotel room, staring at a toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 509

You deserved it 86

By Joe Lizen - 07/08/2012 01:40 - United States - New Lenox

Today, my mom called me screaming and cussing because she found pot in my room. I come home and my dad says, "I hid some pot in your room and I'm not letting you go to that concert if you rat me out." My dad is apparently a blackmailing 52-year-old stoner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 233

You deserved it 2 189

I recognize that voice

By Ratted - 10/10/2024 12:00 - United States

Today, I secretly took a day off work, since I had to use up my vacation, and wanted a "me day." My wife called, and I was ready to pretend to be at work. Too bad the cat decided to come up behind me and meow loudly, alerting my wife that I was home. She's pissed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 172

You deserved it 600

Current trends

By Anonymous - 09/02/2022 04:00 - United States - Kula

Today, I finally cheated. Not in my non-existent personal life, but on Wordle. It wasn't even a hard word. FML

I agree, your life sucks 588

You deserved it 346

FML on Facebook

Keywords

Health Embarrassing Neighbours Poopoo peepee Relationship advice I need your advice Relatable Love Heartbreak Holidays Vacation Camping Mental health Annoying Scary Miscellaneous Grandparents Music Awkward Suspicious Work Insects Gross Instagram Facebook Social Media Ironic Healthy Lifestyle Fast food Money

The Top

Today, my husband and I switched phones by accident. I've already received several naked pictures from one of his co-workers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 65 815

You deserved it 4 408

Today, my college English teacher told me if I wanted an explanation for my grade I would have to schedule a conference to come to her office. It's an online class. I took an online class because I can't come in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 458

You deserved it 4 396

Today, after watching Hulk with my friends, we spent a good half hour discussing exactly how enlarged Bruce Banner's package would be in his Hulk state. I couldn't hide my excitement, and now my friends won't stop teasing me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 540

You deserved it 25 410

Today, I got a promotion to management at work. My employer decided to give the 'non-management' employees a really nice raise. Which means the job I had before my promotion is now paying more than the job I have now. Did I just get demoted? FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 944

You deserved it 2 637

Today, my obnoxious bully of an aunt forced me to walk a mile to the store in the rain to buy her a lottery ticket. When I got back, she thanked me by scream-singing “When Somebody Loves You” in the most ear-rapingly atrocious caterwaul imaginable. We’re staying with her for the rest of the week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 993

You deserved it 163

Today, I recently taught my 6 year-old son that, to be polite, you have to pretend you haven't noticed if someone farts. Now it embarrassingly just happened to me, and he shouted with a big smile, "See? I'm pretending I didn't hear it!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 139

You deserved it 369