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Choking over here

By JD. - 13/04/2021 00:30

Today, I made the horrible mistake of leaving my car windows cracked while at work. Not only is the exterior yellow due to the pollen, but so is the interior. I'm not allergic, but you can feel the pollen in the back of your throat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 807

You deserved it 293

I'm no stereotype, but come on Susan…

By Queen of Queens Darling - 06/06/2022 12:00

Today, a woman I work with confessed her love to me, but when I turned her down, she accused me of being a playboy, a manipulator, and a liar who led her on. I'm quite openly gay, so in no way did I ever lead her on, and the only way she could have not known I was gay was if she walked around with her eyes shut. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 122

You deserved it 137

Classic

By thirsty artist - 28/09/2023 08:00

Today, I was working on a painting and went to take a sip of my tea. Instead, I took a swig of paint water. FML

I agree, your life sucks 627

You deserved it 258

Customers from hell, part 374

By JuiceBoy - 05/07/2022 12:00

Today, at my supermarket job, I told an elderly woman that we no longer sell her favorite juice due to supply chain issues. She got so upset that she peed on the floor. I had to clean it up. I don’t get paid enough for this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 071

You deserved it 71

Suspicious minds

By Anonymous - 31/03/2025 00:00 - Canada - Midland

Today, I poured out a glass of apple juice to drink. I threw out a beer can from earlier, and my mom thought I was drinking alcohol, not juice. She scolded me, until I made her physically taste the juice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 378

You deserved it 98

The Brian Harvey

By Yougotmail - 17/07/2022 06:00

Today, I managed to run over my own foot with my own car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 462

You deserved it 670

Arnold Layne

By Anonymous - 28/04/2025 12:00 - United States - Portland

Today, my cat brought me a “gift” by dragging in a sock from my neighbor’s porch. It was a child's sock. I took it back to them, but I'm pretty sure the neighbor now thinks I steal clothes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 328

You deserved it 106

Bladdered

By Anonymous - 14/05/2021 11:01 - India - Delhi

Today, while playing cards, with my dad, mom and sister, I excused myself to go to the bathroom several times just to secretly chat with my crush. I laughed so hard at a joke that I wet my pants. My family thinks I need to see a doctor because I was going to the bathroom so often between card games. FML

I agree, your life sucks 237

You deserved it 1 399

Freaked out

By The Buzzing - 28/07/2022 14:00 - United States

Today, after going on a fly-killing spree all around my house, I had the most ridiculous nightmare where I was terrorized by a fly that looked like it was having a seizure whenever it was flying. When it landed on my arm, I woke up and felt a strange sensation on my arm. Great, I didn't want to sleep anyway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 681

You deserved it 170

Right place…

By Not Her, sorry - 03/05/2025 09:00 - United States

Today, I was walking through my local park when I noticed a guy getting down on one knee with a ring box in hand. As I got closer, he looked at me, got a horrified expression on his face, and shouted, “Oh no, wrong woman!” He then awkwardly stood up, put the ring back in his pocket, and scuttled away. That's probably the closest I'll ever get to a proposal. FML

I agree, your life sucks 496

You deserved it 148

Secrecy

By Anonymous - 15/06/2021 11:01

Today, I went to spend some time with my family. Unbeknownst to me, while I was having quality time with my family, my boyfriend of a year and a half was packing up his belongings and going back to his estranged wife. FML

I agree, your life sucks 922

You deserved it 247

Caught in 4K

By Gwen - 24/05/2025 03:00 - Russia - Kolomna

Today, it was just epic. You know what's the last thing you want to hear from your naked husband, whom you are passionately playing with on a kitchen table? In a REALLY frivolous position too? "Uh… Hey kids!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 236

You deserved it 348

Body positive

By jade - 03/08/2022 06:00

Today, I was told I looked “too timid.” I was feeling extremely confident having aced a test, but I didn’t look like it. I’ve practiced carrying myself more confidently for hours every single day in front of a mirror, to no avail. I guess body language just isn’t my thing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 818

You deserved it 156

Boots on the ground

By Anonymous - 03/06/2025 00:00 - Germany - Essen

Today, when I took off my shoes to change into my work boots, I smelled dog poop. I must have stepped in it on the way to my car this morning. Guess what the floor mat of my brand new car looks (and smells) like… FML

I agree, your life sucks 393

You deserved it 120

That one Orson Welles .gif

By I AM SO BORED - 06/12/2023 12:00 - United States

Today, I sent a message to vent about my boring team meeting to the team group chat instead of to my friend. Everyone responded with a virtual slow clap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 73

You deserved it 766

Harbinger of doom

By Harbinger of feline death - 07/12/2023 00:00 - United States

Today, I visited a friend's house, where I found out he has a trio of very friendly cats in his yard. After playing with them for a bit, I went inside. An hour later, my friend informed me that one of them had died. None of them were showing any signs of being near death. I'm sad and confused. FML

I agree, your life sucks 552

You deserved it 132

Home sweet home

By Enough - 20/06/2025 00:00 - Romania

Today, when I got home from the store, the dog was wiping his ass on the carpet, my two older boys were brawling, my youngest was crying because he'd broken a glass and cut himself, and my husband was in the kitchen, eating the cake I'd told him to leave alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 564

You deserved it 95

DIY Haircuts

By Anonymous - 19/06/2021 04:01 - Germany

Today, I cut my own hair. It looks great. Absolutely professional. From the front, that is. FML

I agree, your life sucks 314

You deserved it 762

Social safety nets, now!

By Anonymous - 26/08/2022 04:00 - Malta - Tarxien

Today, it was my birthday. I spent a pleasant day with one of my best friends, then I spent four hours in the emergency room because my husband broke his foot while working. We're both self-employed, so production is going to fall 6 weeks behind. FML

I agree, your life sucks 861

You deserved it 146

Buffering

By Anonymous - 23/06/2021 13:59

Today, I was in the car with my boyfriend. After telling him how much I loved him, he asked me to marry him. When I said yes and started crying, he said he wasn't sure if he really wants to get married. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 041

You deserved it 118

Dingus

By Anonymous - 27/12/2023 06:00 - Australia - Brisbane

Today, in attempt to save a few bucks on visiting the doctor, my drunk husband tried to relocate his own disjointed finger, using a vice grip. We ended up with an $800 ambulance bill and then a welfare check from Social Services. FML

I agree, your life sucks 498

You deserved it 158

Denial spectrum

By Anonymous - 28/12/2023 06:00 - United Kingdom

Today, and since my son was diagnosed autistic, my sister refuses to have anything to do with him, because she doesn’t want her kids around him. The only reason her two kids aren’t diagnosed with autism and ADHD is because she refuses to let doctors assess them. Her kids are worse than mine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 665

You deserved it 161

Stop!

By Anonymous - 04/07/2025 00:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I was trying to take a nice picture of my dad but he was just doing stupid-looking poses, so I got mad and told him to "stop acting like a prostitute" without knowing what that even means. Keep in mind, this was also in front of my mum and oldest sister. FML

I agree, your life sucks 80

You deserved it 678

Hiding

By Anonymous - 05/07/2025 03:00 - United States

Today, I learned just how disgusted I am by my own body, when I was debating whether or not I should wear a baggy hoodie in 92 degree Fahrenheit weather. FML

I agree, your life sucks 351

You deserved it 167

Brainrot

By Susan01 - 08/07/2025 09:00 - United States - Boston

Today, I was in a serious meeting with my boss and a client when I remembered a dumb meme my friend sent me last night. I couldn’t stop myself from snorting. Everyone stopped and looked at me. My boss said, “Is something funny?” Nope. Not anymore. FML

I agree, your life sucks 114

You deserved it 526

Missed the boat

By dyl - 09/01/2024 15:00 - United States - San Diego

Today, things I was bullied for such as having online friends, playing Roblox, Steam, and other video games, are now seen as cool. I wished I could have a social life as a teenager and turned to online gaming because nobody wanted to invite me out with them. Apparently, teens socialize over that now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 482

You deserved it 160

Wishful thinking

By Anonymous - 15/07/2025 22:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my wife told me she’s pregnant and we went through the whole range of emotions together, surprise, happiness, tears, anger, acceptance, you name it. An hour later she said she wanted to save the pregnancy test for memories. Guess she forgot her glasses, it very clearly says NOT pregnant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 507

You deserved it 105

Wiped out

By At least I came... - 17/09/2022 02:00 - Germany - Frechen

Today, my wife and I had a quickie, then my wife left to fetch our daughter afterward. I wanted to work out, but after that orgasm, I didn't have the energy. I wrote my wife that due to my recent orgasm, I was too weak for sport. Turns out I wrote it to a group chat including my wife and mother-in-law. FML

I agree, your life sucks 557

You deserved it 1 886

Lonely

By Anonymous - 08/07/2021 20:01 - Australia - Kenwick

Today, the only notification I got on my phone all day was a reminder I set to take a fibre supplement and stool softener. FML

I agree, your life sucks 758

You deserved it 162

Wash, rince, repeat

By Vicious Cycle - 19/09/2022 11:30 - United States

Today, it has been a month since I was forced to attend my grandmother's birthday party, despite the fact that I was sick at the time. Just as I got better, my mom got sick. Then when she got better, my dad got sick. Finally, now that my dad is better, guess who's sick again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 858

You deserved it 123

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The Top

Today, I worked up the courage to comment on my crush's picture. I wrote, "Cool picture" on his Facebook profile picture. Pleased with myself, I later logged on to see if he had replied. He had. Well, at least he took the time to reply, "Who the fuck are you?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 928

You deserved it 12 245

Today, it's been 1 month since I've accepted that I'm gay, 1 week since telling my strict, southern baptist, bible-thumping parents, 1 day since my mom stopped crying and my dad finally spoke to me, and 1 hour since discovering that I'm pregnant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 874

You deserved it 2 101

Today, I was so happy to hear my phone go "Ding" that I jumped for joy out of my couch. It was actually a character on my TV getting a text. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 705

You deserved it 304

Today, I posted that I'm having a yard sale and listed a bunch of stuff I'm selling. People started messaging, asking me to send pictures and prices. That's why I'm having the yard sale, so I don't have to post pictures and prices! FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 513

You deserved it 334

Today, my daughter thinks the way to save money is to stop taking her antidepressants, because they give her “uncontrollable” food cravings. FML

I agree, your life sucks 628

You deserved it 118

Today, and for the last three months, I’ve felt super incompatible with my therapist, but I don’t know how to fire her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 248

You deserved it 445