Life Goals By FML Videos - 12/11/2018 00:00 Don't stop believing! I agree, your life sucks 249 You deserved it 89 Share Tweet Share
Today, at my job as a bouncer at a music venue, a guy got his nose broken in a rowdy mosh pit. When I went to help him up and see if he was okay, he said, "It was an accident, please don't kick me out," but the word "please" came out as a hot spray of his blood across my face. FML I agree, your life sucks 41 653 You deserved it 3 455
Today, my mom finally noticed the joke file I have on my PC desktop called "bigcocklovespussy.jpg". It's just a cute picture of a chicken snuggling with a cat. She didn't actually open the file and just deleted it. She won't believe my explanation and grounded me for a month for "looking at porn". FML I agree, your life sucks 19 507 You deserved it 7 688
Today, I watched as my girlfriend washed the last of the dishes with a dishcloth, then used that same dishcloth to wipe down the counters. I now understand why we always have bugs. FML I agree, your life sucks 312 You deserved it 256
Today, like every other day, my boss referred to my breasts as pillows he needs to nap on. FML I agree, your life sucks 39 450 You deserved it 4 955
Today, I was at the grocery store with my dad. He let out a very silent but foul abomination of a fart. The people behind us started gagging, so he turned, pointed at me and said, "That was my daughter." FML I agree, your life sucks 37 192 You deserved it 3 840
Today, my mobile phone wouldn't turn on. I took it in to the phone store, but they won't fix or replace it because the account is in my dad's name, not mine. He's abroad for the next month, and the only way to get a hold of him is on a number I only stored on my phone. FML I agree, your life sucks 26 157 You deserved it 5 761
All I can think is "I hope his/her spine is okay".