Today, my wife got all excited when she saw the elevator we were in had a feature to make it go sideways. I didn't have the heart to tell her they were the buttons to open and close the door. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my wife pressed a button in the elevator and quickly ran out, leaving me in there with our crying baby. When the elevator arrived at the floor, the doors opened on a wedding reception. The doors couldn't have taken any longer to close again. FML
Today, as I got into an elevator, I spotted a little old lady hobbling desperately to get on. I frantically tapped on the 'door open' button but the doors closed. I got dirty looks from the people in the lift, only then did I realise I had frantically tapped the 'door close' button instead. FML
Today, I saw a woman struggling to hold the elevator. Trying to be helpful, I jumped forward and pressed the “close doors” button, thinking it was “open doors.” The doors shut right in her face. I had to awkwardly ride up ten floors in silence with three witnesses. FML
Today, at work I got in an elevator to go upstairs. It wasn't until the doors opened minutes later and people stepped in that I realized I had zoned out and forgot to press the button for the floor I needed. I then promptly exited the elevator and waited for the next elevator to go up in. FML
Today, I got stuck in an elevator. The help-line told me, "Don't touch the door. We'll be there soon". Two hours later, I had a headache, my legs were stiff, and my date must've thought I stood her up. The tech finally arrived, pries the door open, then rudely asked, "Why didn't you do that yourself?" FML
Today, at work, my boss and I went upstairs to storage. We got in the elevator, I pressed the second floor button, and it didn't move so I repeatedly pressed the button. It wasn't until the fifth press that I realized we were already on the second floor. She thought I was an idiot. FML
Today, while in the elevator with the girl from my office that I've been crushing on, but never spoken to, I said "aren't elevators awkward?" After a long silence, she got off three floors before our office. FML
Today, I got in the elevator with my dog and pressed the button for my floor. Instead of going up, it dropped two floors and opened up to a random basement room filled with nothing but mannequins, and wouldn't go back up. I had to fumble our way to the stairs. FML
Today, my neighbor told me to stop pushing the elevator buttons and opening doors with my feet. I bitched him out, because he's been making a huge issue out of it for months. Right after, I realized I forgot my keys inside and he's the only person around who could let me back into the building. FML
Today, I was in a big crowded elevator and had to struggle tried to press the button for my floor because no one close to the buttons bothered to ask me which floor I was going to. Instead, I hit the emergency stop button. The elevator stopped between floors for 20 minutes. Everyone stared at me like I was a movie villain. FML
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Top comments
GAOStarr 15
Was it Willy Wonka's glass elevator?
drumguy218 11
wow...
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Comments (138)
drumguy218 11
wow...
nooblper 21
Clearly OP married a winner.
Lebeaugars95 20
at least her IQ just got elevated
midnighteyes14 11
how very punny of you
Stazza11 27
#24 I think she has her ups and downs.
Marcella1016 32
My first thought: Wow, your wife is a dumbass. Then I realized I thought the elevator actually went sideways until I finished reading the FML. I guess we all have our moments lol
Pussycat86 18
I bet she is really hot
sweetbliss3 37
right. im just curious on how old is she, and why has she never been in an elevator before. and if she has been in one before, why she thinks this. oh well, we all have our moments.
incoherentrmblr 22
#47: Don't you mean in's and out's?...
jazzy_123 20
I don't know but I thought that was kind of cute Lol we all make simple mistakes so we don't actually know if OPs wife had a brain fart moment or if maybe she does have a "low IQ"
Lacalema 21
#47 & #89 Could be ups and downs, or ins and outs. I keep going from side to side on it.
brand125 17
c==3
babyvi 6
That would be coool :)
Demig0d6 14
Is ur wife blonde?
Quackadoodledoo 13
You do realise your comment is aimed at #2? Maybe the interface of this app is too complicated for you.
onlychildFTW 34
Turbolift!!! Those would be very cool to have.
warsun 27
#37 wanted his comment to be seen
communisttaco 16
They have elevators that do that. There's one in the Missouri capital building. It requires a key that, but still, it exists
GAOStarr 15
Was it Willy Wonka's glass elevator?
Jiplo 18
Cue Willy Wonka music.
EdenCrystal 21
That's exactly what I was thinking!
badluckalex 23
the fml community is so wierd... why downvote 18 and upvote 26
ktmla 14
#49 just saved #18 from being down voted
alicat13 12
I wanted to write this comment... beaten to it :-)
Redoxx_fml 22
68-A fate worse than death
AviKerensky 17
It's a Wonkavator!
cryssycakesx3 23
vertical floors?
magickitten 26
Horizontal floors?
Wiringify 22
Diagonal floors?
slooby_fml 25
Z-axis floors?
cryssycakesx3 23
I'm aware of my major fail. I deserve to be tarred and feathered.
billiejoeinabox 7
Actually, I confuse those two a lot too. And it's for damn sure I'm not the only one.
Ian7890 23
Hardwood floors?
enddmd 27
No, linoleum floors.
Bentonic 11
I prefer tile, myself...
Enslaved 38
Thinking about an ocean's horizon helps me remember which way is horizontal. Plus I like to Mambo.
incoherentrmblr 22
I prefer a carpet floor, especially during cold months...
ForwardUn2Dawn 18
Floorless floors?
SarahSehhati 40
I remember it as w(h)ores lay on their back lol
communisttaco 16
No floors. Nothing is real
SwordSlayer99 11
How could she get the two mixed up?
silvercamaro 22
Maybe she's never been on an elevator, or she was drunk.....or maybe she's just an idiot?
SnowFangedBeauty 19
I'm sorry, she wasn't aware of that before? I'm pretty sure it's not a new concept...
mattjamt 16
They might live in a rural area. I do, and the only times I ever actually use an elevator is when I'm in the hospital, or visiting NYC. Don't think I've ever seen one outside of those 2 places.
A07 48
It would'nt happen to be her first time in an elevator, would it?
myind_yabiness 13
What did she think the bell button was? Coffee hour?
badluckalex 23
I prefer tea
BoltTheSuperdog 22
Taco Bell delivery.
LexiDaBae 17
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
9th! Sorry, but this is the highest number comment I've gotten. But yeah, I dont see how this is an FML. You could just tell her, its not like she'd burst into tears, right? But you seem like a good person. P.S. Does your wife happen to be a blonde? ;)
baxeh 29
Day 675: Some people still haven't realised that posting their comments number will only make the rest of us want to slap them in the face with a brick. Seriously though, it's nothing but annoying.
xx_alexmagm_xx 12
Very educational