Mother's Day: Sweets and Bummers

Between disastrous breakfasts in bed and unusual gifts, Mother's Day is an inexhaustible source of laughter.

By Aisu - 08/05/2009 18:14 - United States

Today, my mother called me a bad son for not telling her "Happy Mother's Day". When I told her Mother's Day wasn't until the 10th, she said that I would have forgotten anyway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 851

You deserved it 3 067

By BbyDelight - 27/04/2009 03:39 - Canada

Today, it was my mom's birthday. I decided to get her a Willow Tree statue of a woman fairy holding a heart. After dinner, I presented my gift. My mother asked me how much it was. I replied, $30. She threw me a dirty look, shoved the present in my direction, and told me to return it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 820

You deserved it 8 649

By traveller - 13/04/2009 10:45 - United States

Today, I drove 9 hours and took Monday off of work to surprise my Mom and Dad for Easter. They weren't home so I called to tell them the surprise, rather than wait. They didn't answer as they were on a flight to Denver to surprise me for Easter since "I couldn't get off work." FML

I agree, your life sucks 76 528

You deserved it 14 462

Unlucky

By Tim - 09/04/2009 21:44 - United States

Today, my mom had a baby shower. When it was over, I walked around cleaning up the trash. I saw a card sitting on the table, along with a note to my mom saying, "Better luck with this one." At the moment I'm an only child, and the card was from my grandmother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 75 711

You deserved it 4 257

By Noname - 15/03/2009 05:39 - United States

Today, I went to a birthday party for my friend's daughter. I picked up a gift for the girl and another for her parents. I got the mother a cute little garden stone that read "What our children see in the world depends on what we show them." Later, I found out her daughter is blind. FML

I agree, your life sucks 70 573

You deserved it 17 227

Brown and sticky

By Jon - 14/03/2009 06:30 - United States

Today, I came home a day after my birthday, and was greeted by my mother who told me, "Oh, I have birthday present for you." She explained that she and my father went on a hike, and handed me my present. I got a fucking stick for my birthday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 88 184

You deserved it 6 351

HB!

By Kensie - 04/03/2009 21:48 - United States

Today, it is mine and my twin sister's birthday. We both wanted a day at the spa for our birthday. My sister got a gift certificate to the spa, while I got mouthwash and a $20 gift card to Target. My mom said it would cost too much to make me also pretty. FML

I agree, your life sucks 121 819

You deserved it 5 988

By clementine8 - 14/02/2009 06:23 - United States

Today, my Mom came to pay me a short visit at college. She handed me some flowers, which were a Valentine's Day gift, because she "figured I wouldn't be getting any from anyone else this year." FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 541

You deserved it 2 803

By lousy - 31/01/2009 22:23 - United States

Today, I live with my mother and realized she goes out with her friends and dates more times a week than I do in a single month. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 081

You deserved it 3 906

By beekie9 - 14/01/2009 14:26 - United States

Today, my mom asked all the old ladies in her church to pray that I meet "someone special". FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 277

You deserved it 2 248

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The Top

Today, my sister, who has "borrowed" almost nine hundred dollars from me over the last few months, told me I was pathetic for not having my driver's license yet and that I "wasn't normal". I was saving that money for my driving lessons. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 868

You deserved it 1 064

Today, I filled out an online application for a internship. I didn't have all the info I need to complete it, but it wouldn't let me leave anything blank so to move along I filled in crap answers. I pressed "Save". It sent my draft in. I now have to explain that "Jesus" isn't actually my reference. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 957

You deserved it 24 440

Today, I've been calling my girlfriend by her nickname for so long, I had to reactivate my Facebook account to find her real name. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 282

You deserved it 26 827

Today, my girlfriend hated the idea of sex so much she was willing to give me money for a stripper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 903

You deserved it 5 990

Today, my father was taking pictures of my friend and me as we got ready for homecoming. After the pictures were taken, he offered to show us. He scrolled one picture too far and ended up showing us a picture of his penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 399

You deserved it 5 187

Today, after being on steroids to suppress my immune system, I found out it causes pulmonary embolisms. If I stop taking my steroids, my body will try to kill me, but if I take the steroids, the meds will try to kill me. I’m only 35 and was fit before this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 587

You deserved it 168