Today, I had two different tennis shoes on all day and no one noticed, including myself. When I mentioned it to my family, they told me not to worry about it because no one pays attention me anyway. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, marks the fourth day in a row that I've worn the same outfit to prove to my parents that they pay me no attention. They still haven't noticed. FML
Today, I was complimented on my hat by two different people. I wasn't wearing a hat. FML
Today, I wore my new shoes to work, feeling confident. Halfway through the day, I found out that I'd forgotten to remove a giant price sticker on the left sole. My boss pointed it out during a meeting, as I crossed my legs. FML
Today, at work, I was waiting in line to pay my food at the cafeteria when I noticed the doctor who was in front of me had these really cool looking shoes on. I told him, "I like your shoes!" He turned over, looked at me and didn’t say anything back. FML
Today, I lent my brand new earrings to one of my friends. Everyone told her that they are pretty, and look really great on her. I've been wearing them for the last 3 weeks, and no one has ever mentioned them. FML
Today, I accidentally left the tag on the new pants that I wore to work. Nobody had brought it to my attention for the whole day until finally, before I was about to go home, every single employee and my boss let me know by yelling in unison and laughing as I left the building. FML
Today, I carried my golf bag from the club house to my car. When I got there, my rear pocket got caught in a zipper on the bag. I couldn't get them separated. I had to take my pants off to fix it. Yes, three couples walked by, pretending not to notice. Had it not happened to me, I would not believe this story. FML
Today, I went to the store to buy some new shirts. I tried them on and none of them fit. When I walked out to return the shirts, everybody was staring at me. I looked down to see why. I'd forgotten to put my original shirt back on. FML
Today, I returned to work after testing out my theory yesterday that absolutely nobody would notice or care if I just did not show up. So far so good. FML
Today, I tried to casually lean against a counter during a conversation at a party and missed. I recovered by pretending I meant to crouch and check my shoelaces. No one bought it. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Yudith 28
You now have the official permission to wear whatever you damn like, including a Batman costume, a Borat mankini, Femen-style painting, giga-slippers and so on.
Zebediabolical 45
Is your name Punky Drewster?
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (4)
Zebediabolical 45
Is your name Punky Drewster?
jkjorn 18
I'm sorry, were you saying something?
vicewinner 5
Seriously, there is no law that one has to wear matching shoes, socks, earrings and so on.
Yudith 28
You now have the official permission to wear whatever you damn like, including a Batman costume, a Borat mankini, Femen-style painting, giga-slippers and so on.