Intimacy: Today, my wife asked me to pop an ingrown hair near her crotch....

By GettingNone - 25/06/2009 03:05 - France

Today, my wife asked me to pop an ingrown hair near her crotch. We haven't had sex since last September. Popping her ingrown hair was the closest I've gotten to my wife's vagina in nearly nine months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 73 348

You deserved it 6 248

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Same thing different taste

By Iswearihavegoodhygiene - 04/11/2018 05:00

Today, I popped a zit that had formed around an ingrown hair "down there". It popped with so much force, the pus hit me in the forehead. Still can't get the hair out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 260

You deserved it 277

Girl, DIY

By Anonymous - 23/06/2023 03:00

Today, my wife yelled at me to "just stick it up her ass already." No, not for anal sex, it was a suppository she got from the doctor. This is the closest I’ve been to sex in two years, since she decided we were done having sex and won’t even explain why when I ask. We’re only in our 30s. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 233

You deserved it 201

Bad timing, hun

By Anonymous - 19/01/2023 22:00

Today, I just had surgery and my wife finally wants to have sex. Not that there haven't been enough other days in the previous years of marriage… FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 022

You deserved it 180

Ding dong

By Anonymous - 20/11/2020 17:04 - United States - El Macero

Today, I got an ingrown hair. It wouldn’t be so bad, if it were anywhere other than my penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 998

You deserved it 145

Smash the patriarchy

By Anonymous - 19/04/2022 06:00

Today, my boyfriend started avoiding going down on me ever since he found an ingrowing hair down there. The only reason I have an ingrowing hair is because he didn’t like my pubes, and stopped having sex with me at all until I shaved it off, thus causing the ingrowing hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 406

You deserved it 378

Bailed out

By Why's it so cold in here? - 01/02/2015 18:13 - United States

Today, after getting home from being in the field for a week, my wife who's a nurse, convinced me I had a spider bite on my penis. After rushing to the ER and standing nude in a cold exam room while the ER staff checked me out, I learned it's just an ingrown hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 862

You deserved it 2 987

Do ya think I'm sexy?

By wifelyduties - 17/04/2020 14:00

Today, my husband called me to our bedroom, saying he needed help with something. I found him sitting on the bed with his pants down, so I smiled and asked if he was angling for sex, which was fine with me. Nope. He needed me to pop a pimple under his ballsack. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 238

You deserved it 391

By Anonymous - 14/08/2016 06:16 - United States - Warrensburg

Today, I shaved my vagina for the first time ever. Had sex with my husband and then asked if he liked that. He said, "You've done that before, though". I haven't. We've been married 15 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 366

You deserved it 1 846

So frustrating!

By Marvin-jones - 02/03/2023 02:00

Today, my wife accused me of using her for sex. I'd only just admitted to her two days ago that I've been struggling to get it up to try and perform, after a hospital stay and a month of almost no sexual contact. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 115

You deserved it 138

By poor excuse for a father - 27/10/2018 14:00

Today, my wife is out of the country so my daughter asked me for help. She'd tried waxing her "private bits" but it hurt too much so she left the strip stuck down there for nearly two days. I was so unable to handle the situation, I called my wife crying and begging her to come home and deal with it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 869

You deserved it 745

itsnotmytree 0

Thursday 25 June 2009 12:11

How the hell do you go that long without sex? I'm married and we don't go more than 2 or 3 days, even when we're sick. This is after four years, too.

surreal 0

Thursday 25 June 2009 12:12

That sucks! You know the romance is gone when your wife asks you to pop an ingrown hair. Near her ******.

Comments

christopherlove 0

Thursday 25 June 2009 16:58

Not true for everyone, acire. I've known some nymphos that completely lost their sex drives when they got pregnant. As far as nature making you horny in order to encourage procreation goes, why would pregnancy increase sex drive?

whogivesaf_ck08 0

Thursday 25 June 2009 17:00

its good your relationship is close enough for her to ask this of you...however, it should be close enough then to be asking why she hasnt had sex with you, hmmm? talk to your wife man.

judgeymcjudge 0

Thursday 25 June 2009 20:32

This, definitely.

p00p0ster0us 0

Thursday 25 June 2009 17:28

We lack information to guide you. How about f***ing your life up more descriptively?

Katzilla_dances 0

Thursday 25 June 2009 19:00

YDI for not trying to have any romance in your life, this can only lead to divorce.

slax0r 0

Thursday 25 June 2009 19:12

EEEEEWWWWW i was eating while I read this! XP

raaaaaachel 0

Thursday 25 June 2009 19:37

she's your wife, and you haven't had sex for nine months? you need to have a SERIOUS talk with her about that.

SS240 0

Thursday 25 June 2009 19:40

FYL :c If she doesnt start doing her part of the relationship either you guys need an open arrangement or a divorce

junomcguff_fml 0

Thursday 25 June 2009 20:30

Unless she's highly pregnant (you said 9 months, right?) then you need to sit down and talk. Seriously. I mean it. (I'll continiue this comment so that you'll have time to have a conversation while I'm writing it). Now. Today. As soon as possible. Kim Possible. Brandy and mr. Whiskers. Cats have whiskers. I have a cat. Cats bite. I bet you would like to "bite" your wife. You and your wife need to have a talk. Now. Seriously. I mean it.