By sweet pea - 22/09/2016 21:48 - Canada - Red Lake

Today, my mom told me she wouldn't be able to leave my middle-aged brother at home for Christmas in order to meet her first grandchild. FML
I agree, your life sucks 11 321
You deserved it 865

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Unless your brother has some sort of disability that does not allow for him to be alone for extended periods of time, she just chose him over you and your new baby and she needs to know how upset that makes you. A middle age man can take care of himself. If he can't, that is 100 percent her fault and she needs to give him a sink or swim moment.

So then why can't she take him with?

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your middle aged brother needs to grow up

Unless your brother has some sort of disability that does not allow for him to be alone for extended periods of time, she just chose him over you and your new baby and she needs to know how upset that makes you. A middle age man can take care of himself. If he can't, that is 100 percent her fault and she needs to give him a sink or swim moment.

Yeah, if he had a disability then it would be understandable but other than that, the woman has her priorities wrong and the brother should grow up. I'm disabled and when my sister gave birth to her first baby, my mum couldn't travel to be there for the birth because she couldn't leave me alone and I've always felt extraordinarily guilty for it. The birth of a baby, especially a new grandchild is very important and emotional event that my mum couldn't witness because of me.

your brother is debilitated?

So then why can't she take him with?

Maybe OP prefers not to see her brother? It seems like there's already some family weirdness in this situation.

Barring and disabilities this is a dick move picking your brother over you and your newborn

Then the FML would read, "Today, I found out I'll be alone at Christmas because my sister won't visit, effectively forcing my parents to go to them. I'd go too, but [wasn't invited, can't fly, can't get out of work or some other compelling reason]. FML" The parents seem to be in a tough spot either way, so they made a tough choice.

@28: First, it's a lot easier/cheaper for a single middle aged man to travel on a plane than for a family of 3 or more that includes a newborn and a woman who's still recovering from childbirth (yes, that can sometimes take months). Second, who said the brother wasn't invited? He may have been the one that forced his mother to choose by refusing to go. He might just hate kids. Or hates flying. Or hates his sister. Or just hates seeing other people happy because he's 40+ and still living with his mother. Third, if he wasn't invited- there may have been good reason. For all we know, he's not allowed around the child because he's an abusive drunk. Fourth, the brother has had at least 40 Christmas celebrations with his mother already. The baby has had zero. He can't give up ONE Christmas?

Tell her to bring him along if he is disabled-if not mail her some scissors to cut her own cord.. Congrats to you and your little one.

disabled or not (and I believe not or else OP wouldn't complain) I would want my brother to see my baby as well

Not everyone has good relationships with siblings though. If op doesn't want to see her brother that's up to her

I feel like OP would understand if their brother had a disability.

I feel as if maybe some information is missing. My older middle aged brother is mentally handicapped and can't be left unsupervised and can't travel from the house. So if I had a kid, my mother wouldn't be able to be present. I'd have to send her a video and take the kid to meet her.

So how does your mother leave the house then to buy groceries or go to work?

Can't your mother get someone to stay with him like a community nurse?

Tell your brother to visit you for Christmas and then she'll have to come see you. Although I doubt you really want to see her after that situation