I'm sorry that you're mother feels that way. But, maybe she feels unappreciated and maybe she doesn't want to do Christmas with people who possibly take her for granted. Of course, it could be all out selfishness on her behalf. If it's the first one maybe show her that she is appreciated by her family. I came out of a relationship and part of the reason was because I did not appreciate and thus took for granted everything my partner did. Long periods of such behaviour will lead to resentment from the person it is directed at. I hope this helps and I hope you are able to enjoy the holidays.

I mean, if your family (excluding you) is toxic, I'm with your mom on this one. That's why I always spend Christmas with my fiancé and his family now instead of with my biological family. Either way, I'm sorry OP.

Why can't it be both? Maybe your Dad would object?