Today, my grandfather proudly informed me that the dump he'd just took looked like a tiger claw. He announced this during dinner, and told us not to flush it until he could take a picture. FML
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Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I took a massive shit and flushed the toilet, but it apparently didn’t flush properly. My mom then entered the bathroom, took a picture of my shit, and showed it to everyone she knows. She doesn’t understand why I’m embarrassed, and thinks that I should instead "take pride" in my giant poop. FML
Today, while I was doing my hair, my grandpa walked in, dropped his pants, and started taking a crap in the toilet right next to me. FML
Today, my greatgrandpa came over for dinner. Halfway through the meal, he pooped himself. My family went through the rest of the meal acting like we hadn't noticed to avoid embarassment. As it was coming to an end, my sister came home and immediately yelled, "Ew! Did someone poop?" He cried. FML
Today, I took an incredibly painful dump. After I cleaned myself up, I got up and was about to flush, until I saw something moving around in one of the logs of poop. It looked like an earthworm. It wasn't there when I sat down. FML
Today, I stepped in a turd. Not a dog turd, my grandmother's turd. FML
Today, my father-in-law shat himself in my bathroom and tried to flush some of the evidence down my sink. Sink that I'd just cleaned up. FML
Today, I was in a rush and forgot to flush the toilet after taking a huge dump. After coming home from work, I checked my Facebook to find myself tagged by my boyfriend in a photo. The photo was of the toilet, with the caption, "This is what Taco Bell does." FML
Today, I was summoned to the bathroom by my three-year-old, who still needs help cleaning up sometimes. When I walked in, he looked so happy and proud as he pointed to the trash can saying, "Look at my big poop!". Buying a new trash can tomorrow. FML
Today, I took a dump without checking for toilet paper. I then called my step dad, who said "use the stuff in the garbage." FML
Today, I went over to my uncle's house for dinner and my stomach hurt really bad. I noticed there were two toilets and sat in the prettier one and took a huge dump. Turns out I'd chosen the brand new toilet that wasn't connected to anything yet. FML
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Top comments
commedia 16
Charlie Sheen in 20 years?
The_Creeper_fml 8
Can I have a copy of the picture?
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Comments (87)
cjrand 7
Your gramps sounds pretty cool... F your L if you don't enjoy his sense of humor while he lasts
amayranii 2
Gross! Ahaha!
mannykatany 9
I could have been worse, oh wait...
blackwidowtaco 31
It could have, you meant.
Jeymes15 1
he ia probably an active member of RateMyPoo.com
MrGroovy28 7
Safe to assume you are a current member; or frequent user at that site.
TColby 12
This reminds me of the episode of South Park when Stan's dad takes the biggest crap ever.
bethcox 4
That's
HeartsCry 0
must eat high fibre
zach8771 3
It's coiiiiiiling
XDkaate 1
Don't you usually have toilet paper covering the shit ?
sm0kinBCBudz 0
Who gives a tiger shit?
blackwidowtaco 31
No. Just horrible.