use your telekinetic powers b.

when you figured it out you should have hit the panic button.

when you figured it out you should have looked at your boss and hit the panic button.

shut up dude. we get it. #11. Gosh. I bet you were embarressed(:

very tense.....rofl

we have a deputy in the forums goodbye fml

once again no gender Is given! I'm guessing a girl (yea I no I'm going to get girls freaking out to what I just said but oh well if it wasn't true you wouldn't get offended!)

has to be a girl.... for sure.

i got the impression that it was a guy actually

I got the vibe right away that I was a girl.

How is that a FML??? Your life us not ****** and your boss probably had a good laugh.

OK, so apparently my comment didn't post. Let me reiterate. (Sorry if it posts twice) Oh good God. I'm sure the moderators are very sorry for not posting the FML, about the guy who watched his wife butcher their family. This is a place for lighthearted stories, that give people a laugh. It /is/ a feel good place. NOT a place to come and cry and piss and moan about your horrible life. It's for simple, funny and quirky stories. I will explain this /again/ so that EVERYONE reading can understand. In order for a story to be published, it has to have a certain percentage of the regular users press YES and then it goes through the actual moderators. If you are having such an issue with the story, why comment on it at all? Why must you pick it apart and feel the need to share with us an idiotic opinion? These stories are not meant to make some great impression in your life. I see at least 4-5 people on /every/ FML bitch and moan and whine about how this FML is so gay or the moderators suck at picking stories. Do you know how many stories are probably published within any given hour? The moderators work their ass off to make this sight run as smoothly as it does. They /always/ make sure the stories are published ON TIME, they try and cater to each request of the users and do their best at meeting everyones needs. Stop being so god damn picky already! If you don't like what's being picked, go moderate them yourself. If you still don't like what's being picked, delete your account. Sorry. That was necessary.

what the f was that tirade about FFML? all the comments above are in good humor, whf are you talking about fml moderators for?

It's obvious that you didn't read what I said. It is directed to all of the "This is not an FML" comments, but that was quite obvious, so I'm really not sure why I'm here explaining this to you.

That's odd, because when I go to a website entitled "F my life" I expect to hear stories about how ****** someone's life actually is. If you want to post "lighthearted stories, that give people a laugh", why don't you create a lighthearted laughs site?

You expect that, but you have no been informed that you are wrong. Have you ever read any of the Blogs on here? You can tell that the founders of this site are goofy and laid back. They aren't here to make everything cry. I wish at least one mod would come on and agree LOL! They are never around, when you need them.

DAMNIT! *now *everyone

I somehow feel like my prayers have been answered. God must be listening! Shit, that means he's watching, doesn't it? *Puts away sinful toys and objects*

milf....

isn't that "my life is average?"

Whoops! I had meant to direct my last comment to #58. Sorry for the double post!

Just to tell you, QQing about trolls only gives us something to troll you about. If the people complaining bother you that much, why not stop reading comments? That's similar to saying, "Earth is meant to be a happy place, not one filled with crime, so can you guys stop stealing and killing? It's really bothering me!". Nobody is likely to listen. Friendly advice, no offense meant. Sorry if I offended you.

mooo

I agree to your name :)

I agree. The boss was probably chuckling to himself waiting to see how long it would take OP to notice.

just say she's stupid.

that is a very nice hot looking coat rack you got there