White day is the thank you gift a month after valentine's, if I remember correctly. I may be partially wrong

You're right, but I was under the impression even if a girl didn't give you chocolates, it's polite to get women in your life an obligation chocolate. If OP didn't give him an obligation chocolate, that'd explain why she didn't get anything, but it still seems a little rude.

That and also telling the lady you like her too. Or if the lady didn't give you chocolates, you give her some on White Day to tell her, you fancy her. Long story short, White Day is Valentine's Day for men. Also Black Day is for us single people. I like Black Day.

That's what I was thinking, too. I'm pretty sure it's a day for the women to give the men candy or little trinkets, as a thank you for Valentines day. OPs signature says Japan which is really confusing me. Is OP a foreigner in Japan, as well as her coworkers?

White Day is when men give women gifts/chocolate, not the other way around--at least in Japan. In Japan, women five men chocolate on Valentine's Day. It's also a big deal if you make the chocolate yourself and package it yourself.

@7 You got it a bit messed up. On valentine's day the woman are supposed to give the men in their life chocolate's. All the men. Depending on their importance in their life they are getting a small chocolate gift to home-made chocolate's or expensive packages. On white day, the men are supposed to buy their girlfriend one big gift. Some men give small gifts to all the woman in their life, but besides their mother it's not really expected.

On white day, the men will generally give thank you chocolates to the girls who gave them Valentine's chocolates. Perhaps OP did not give him any obligation chocolates on Valentine's day (the way she worded the FML indicates she was expecting to receive Valentine's day chocolates too, so she probably didn't realize that in Japanese tradition it's the women who give gifts on V-day). Obviously it still seems slightly rude to exclude one person so pointedly, but at least it would explain it as well as indicate his actions weren't meant to be malicious and hurtful.

If OP is a foreigner and didn't give out chocolates on Valentine's Day, the coworker might be assuming that she is avoiding Japanese traditions and is just acting accordingly. So it might be a simple misunderstanding.

It absolutely is one of those double standards. While women *can* give men gifts if they're feeling generous, men are all but required to give them to women (at least if you have a girlfriend/boyfriend or something similar). The odd thing is that the Japanese place even more emphasis on piety and politeness than Koreans, so it actually feels odd that OP got left out, especially if she is a foreigner.

In Japan, on Valentine's day, you give chocolates to the men in your life. There's either obligation gifts, for men you're classmates with or work with, familial gifts, for your brothers and what have you, or "Honmei Choco" which is done to show affection or love. White day, which falls a month after, is a day men give women chocolate in a similar manner, usually to say 'thanks' for the chocolate they received the month prior or to reciprocate/reject a woman who gave him honmei chocolate. It goes both ways.

15: Is it really optional for girls? I always got the feeling it was sort of frowned upon to not do it, but I'm a foreigner so I might be misreading the atmosphere.

I'm speaking from the perspective of a person living in Korea who frequents Japan. And it just so happens that these sorts of "love holidays" tend to favor women in terms of the gift-giving process. I never said it's *never* mutual; in fact, I have had girlfriends give/make gifts for me (specifically for Valentine's). To put it simply, it's effectively an unwritten rule for guys to get their girls gifts (especially on White Day), but the women involved may do something if they feel obligated. And for the record, Korea is one of those countries that is actually very hierarchical and sexist (toward women, of course). In Japan, it is less so, and things tend to be a bit more on an even playing field ... which is why I found it more surprising that OP got excluded, especially since she is female.