By Kingspin - 30/03/2011 16:14 - Canada

Today, I woke up to a beautiful sunrise, the smell of bacon in a frying pan, and some dickhead trying to pick the lock on my front door. FML
I agree, your life sucks 36 688
You deserved it 2 922

Kingspin tells us more.

Kingspin 0

...How would I explain the third degree burns and traces of bacon grease? And he ran off luckily.

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Top comments

UTTU 0

Let him go to sleep hearing the sound of a 12 gauge.

82 1
underpaid011 0

open the door then splash the very hot bacon grease on the asshole. then say "pick that mother ******" and for good measure kick him square in the sack, then in the face and ribs. then call the cops. don't forget to say "i was terrified!! I thought the guy was going to break in and kill me!!". blame the face and rib injuries on him "falling down".

33 0

Comments

EpicJames24 18

I would've waited in front of the door for him to open it, pointed a gun at him and said, "can I help you?"

0 0
terrix7 13

Waittt. You woke up and bacon was already cooking, yet someone was trying to pick your lock? Does someone live with you to cook the bacon? If so, why did you hear the guy trying to pick you up and your roommate didn't??

2 0
lucasjames22 8

im confused. obviously op wasn't alone because someone was making bacon. so they call the cops or try to scare whoever's trying to break in.

0 0