Today, I went to a dance and saw a really cute guy. Glow sticks were everywhere, so trying to be cute, I took a broken one and dripped some of the glowing liquid on my chest. It made him notice me, but only for him to point out that I'd managed to cut myself and was bleeding badly. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, at a wild party, I cracked open a few glowsticks and drew patterns on my face and arms with the glowing liquid, then started dancing, hoping to impress some hotties. I was tearing it up until my skin started to burn, really bad. I ended up running out screaming and calling 911. FML
Today, I saw a cute guy walking out of a restaurant. When he saw me, he smiled and to be a bit flirty I bit my lip. Too bad it started to bleed like hell. FML
Today, I tried to show off my dance moves at a party and ended up falling through a glass table. FML
Today, I went to a dance with the boy I like. To my delight, he tried to pick me up. To my dismay, he couldn't. FML
Today, I went out clubbing with a few friends. A cute guy pointed at me from the bar and motioned for me to come over. I was excited and did just that. Turns out he just wanted to ask me if I'd thought about seeing a doctor for my jaundice. No, I just overdid my spray tan. FML
Today, I was making out with this guy when my nose started bleeding, and it got on his face. FML
Today, I was at a party when I got covered in the liquid from a glow stick. Thinking it wasn't a big deal I went to rub it off, but it stuck to my clothes. The cops came so everyone ran and hid in the bushes because we were all drunk. The cops arrested fifteen people because I glowed. FML
Today, I was at my friend's birthday party, dancing barefoot because my feet hurt from my shoes' heels. Apparently, someone dropped a glass on the dancefloor and didn't warn anybody. I ended up having to drive myself to the emergency room because all my friends were "having too much fun to leave." FML
Today, I was at a wedding and I reluctantly joined the dance floor. As soon as I started dancing, I felt my trousers rip. Trying to save face, I kept dancing, hoping no one would notice. A few minutes later, I realized my silk boxer shorts were completely visible to the entire party. FML
Today, I went to a party wearing a cute new pale blue dress. As I was walking through the crowd, I felt something cold and wet on my back. Someone had spilled a drink on me, but instead of saying anything, whoever did it pretended nothing happened. I spent the rest of the night with a giant dark blue wet stain on my back. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
thatnucca 36
Your heart certainly bleeds for attention OP...
bazingabitches 17
Why would that be a good idea? "okay, just let me drip some glowing toxic substance on my skin, nothing can go wrong with that"
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (133)
davincidasecond 24
I don't know about anyone else, but as soon as I see glowing boobs, I walk the opposite direction.
pedinhuh 23
If I was the guy would've remained silent, and let Darwin do his thing...
mrtonyanderson 20
Idiot
jujuroxursox 15
What color was the glow stick? Each has a meaning and maybe you were sending him the wrong signal! Just screwing with ya! Sorry to hear you got cut… maybe stay away from broken glow sticks? Or broken things that look sharp?
iwadasn 33
Why would you want to dump chemicals on yourself in the first place? There are better ways than that to get attention if you're so desperate for it.
ironwords 8
That's not cute at all. That's pretty slutty
ajaj26 12
How the **** is 'trying to be cute'?
Shivyzzzz 8
How did you cut yourself...
termin8tor786 10
Dumbass!!!
Sir_Swaggington 6
***** shaming*
Dessert_ed_FML 9
I see what you did there..