Today, I was talking to my boss about her children. She told me she didn’t want them to develop any problems by letting them sleep with the light on. I didn’t tell her last night I slept with the light on because I’m scared of ghosts. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my daughter was acting strange. When she wasn’t muttering in some strange language, she was talking about invisible people coming to get me. Terrified, I called my boyfriend. Turns out he taught her that as a prank. He knows I’m afraid of anything supernatural. FML
Today, my daughter’s sleepwalking has been so bad that none of us has slept more than a few hours a night in weeks. We took her to a pediatrician, who referred her to a sleep clinic for children that has no openings for 6 months. My boyfriend is convinced my house is haunted, scaring the other kids. FML
Today, my boss told me she had a nightmare where her life depended on me, and I let her die. Now I'm ridiculously paranoid that I'm going to get fired at any second. FML
Today, my mother thought it would be funny to sneak into my room at night and scream like a demon, after I'd explained to her how scared I was of The Exorcist movie I had just seen. She claims it wasn't her. FML
Today, after my girlfriend had a nightmare this morning, I stayed home because she has really bad anxiety issues. A couple of hours later, she's pissed because I said I would stay up, but I fell asleep. FML
Today, I couldn’t sleep because the hall light was too bright. Someone left their room; I waited for them to return so we wouldn’t cross paths. I got up and went for the light, only to find them peeing naked with the door open. In a panic I flipped any switch, which made the hall brighter, then ran. FML
Today, I was the last to go upstairs, so I had to turn off the lights. My tired brain decided to use my phone flashlight to check if all the lights were out. FML
Today, my little sister asked what the noises were last night. It happened to be my dad and his girlfriend fooling around. I ended up telling her it was ghosts. Now I'm grounded by my dad who yelled at me for scaring her. I was trying to save his ass from a lot of questions. FML
Today, my coworker said that she suddenly got the shivers. I jokingly told her that it meant she must be being watched by a dead person and made stupid ghost noises. She then told me it was the anniversary of her dad's death and burst into tears. FML
Today, in the early hours of the morning, I woke up in sleep paralysis, hallucinating the sight of children hanging from the ceiling. Now I'm scared to sleep. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
purplestuff_fml 0
I always sleep with the lights on :(
panda_rectum 0
Don't worry, Capser is the friendly ghost!
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (173)
mylifeisfuckeddd 0
WHO YA GANNA CALL? GHOSTS BUSTERS!!!
tiltwrestler 0
You know how people like you are scared of the Boogeyman? Well, the Boogeyman is scared of Chuck Norris.
Roddsy 0
;0 but but but i thought the boogie man was killeds by jack skellington! ;p
Username_1000 0
haha #17 and 93
so_me_fml 0
When I sleep with the light on, it's because of ax murderers, not ghosts. To each her own though.
KEVINPASH 0
Pussy Pussy Pussy
ladybug6 0
The sad thing is that you're probably like 25-40 years old.. Anyways, this one made me laugh :)
were_giraffe 2
You can have a job and believe in ghosts. It's rather small minded and somewhat uneducated to assume otherwise. Ghosts and sightings have been a part of American culture for quite a long time. There's thousands of locations well known as being haunted... even the White House staff have reported seeing ghosts for over a hundred years. But yes, it's much easier to just go and call someone stupid because it makes you feel strong and powerful. Sadly, that's far lamer than believing in ghosts will ever be.
StrawberryPiez_ 0
Wwhat the hell? how old are you?
sameoldsameold 0
who cares?