Intimacy: Today, I was just taking a wank with my laptop on low battery.... - FML

By Noname - 07/01/2009 15:07 - United Kingdom

Spicy

Today, I was just taking a wank with my laptop on low battery. Almost finished when my laptop died. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 479

You deserved it 56 513

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Same thing different taste

By masterfail - 04/10/2009 05:04 - United States

Spicy

Today, I woke up after a heavy night of drinking, with my laptop dead on my chest. Apparently, I had attempted a bit of digital penile oscillation, but passed out instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 486

You deserved it 19 817

By Moody - 28/10/2009 19:14 - United States

Spicy

Today, I opened my personal laptop at a company meeting. I forgot that the battery died while watching a porno last night. It was ten seconds of slurping, spitting and gagging. It was my first day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 406

You deserved it 38 331

Oh, the humanity

By Anonymous - 23/03/2023 18:00

Today, I was giving a presentation at work but accidentally spilled water all over my laptop. I tried to dry it off, but it wouldn't turn on. I had to give the presentation awkwardly using my phone and everyone took the piss out of me and my shoddy performance. FML

I agree, your life sucks 611

You deserved it 248

By KDM - 05/02/2012 19:39 - Australia

Today, I realised how socially inept I am, when I muttered an apology to my laptop after I noticed I hadn't plugged its charger in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 966

You deserved it 6 610

Likely story

By thenerd - 24/03/2021 02:00

Today, I was doing an online live exam with the camera on when the power suddenly went out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 003

You deserved it 59

Bad timing

By Anonymous - 20/04/2022 18:01 - Australia

Spicy

Today, I was pantsless, horny, and my vibrator died, so I put it on charge next to my bed. My mum then came in, crying hysterically about how she got fired. I was still naked. I felt so bad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 141

You deserved it 280

By "Anti_Sora" - 05/01/2019 00:00

Today, I turned in my final worth 20% of the grade. Today was also the day my internet decided to die. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 207

You deserved it 306

Tesla was robbed

By Fuck you, Tesla. - 21/09/2021 14:00

Today, my car ran out of battery. I'm writing this from the middle of the road. FML

I agree, your life sucks 555

You deserved it 634

Slapstick

By aireun - 09/07/2009 05:33 - United States

Today, my laptop plug got stuck in the wall outlet. I stood there for 10 minutes violently trying to yank it out. My boss came in and screamed at me for making noise. I was angry, so I glared at him and yanked on the plug as hard as I could. It dislodged itself noiselessly and I fell over. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 278

You deserved it 42 126

By Anonymous - 03/02/2016 15:29 - Australia - Hove

Today, my mum had no legitimate reason to have her daily yell at me, so she resorted to bitching me out for putting her phone on charge after it started beeping with a low battery warning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 273

You deserved it 1 475

Next

Top comments

WhatThePhuc 0

Sunday 8 February 2009 8:03

just use ur imagination

katers4life 0

Sunday 17 May 2009 20:10

uhmm plug it in? or think of me ;D

Comments

phorcep 0

Thursday 2 September 2010 12:16

^this^

xxKELLxx 0

Sunday 5 September 2010 18:35

How about you try getting and actual girlfriend instead of bitching that your laptop died when you were watching ****? Seriously, unless you're like THAT guy that everyone thinks is weird... So, you deserve it... •___•

FML102938 8

Thursday 16 June 2011 4:43

#60 why get I girlfriend? I'd just think about you ;)

ExtremeEncounter 32

Tuesday 10 March 2015 3:31

Yeah because it's so easy. Just slap a girls ass and watch the panties drop, right?

playa459 0

Tuesday 28 September 2010 3:19

Wanker!!!!!

bongomanacome 0

Wednesday 6 October 2010 17:45

you are ******* stupid

carcinogan 0

Friday 15 October 2010 12:51

damn I hate that too thank god for my iPhone and the ability to watch videos fast :)

emmyers 0

Wednesday 20 October 2010 21:34

get real problems :/

lenardisag 8

Monday 25 October 2010 19:23

dude whats even worse is when you forget that happened and you let someone use your laptop after its charged and th first thing they see when it re-opens is what you were watching. GAME OVER!!

ipod_addict 0

Saturday 30 October 2010 2:11

EPIC WIN

Beagle91196 0

Wednesday 1 December 2010 6:55

LMFAO

Gabby49 0

Tuesday 15 March 2011 22:23

your dumb as hell. honestly? thats an fml? get a life.

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The Top

Today, I was working as a stagehand for one of my college classes. I’m diabetic and can’t go without food for more than a few hours. I was told that if I left early, ate anything backstage, or passed out, I would fail the class. I passed out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 514

You deserved it 69

Today, my new neighbor asked if I could keep my dog from yapping during the evenings, because it kept him awake last night. I don't have a dog, but I apologized anyway. I didn't have the heart to admit that those are the sounds my girlfriend makes during sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 019

You deserved it 8 493

The Top

Today, half of my motivation to stop drinking is so that my tolerance will go down, because I currently can't actually afford enough alcohol to get even tipsy anymore. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 483

You deserved it 12 781

Today, when I was done masturbating to the thought of my crush I noticed my phone was lit up. I turned it over and stared in horror as I saw a call connected to him. I had been loudly moaning his name. I guess I hit his speed dial when I was setting my phone down. He was definitely still on the line. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 836

You deserved it 4 021

Today, I was in the supermarket when I saw a little boy trying to reach for something on the top shelf. I went over to him and asked if his mom knew where he was. The boy turned around. He was actually a very angry midget. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 577

You deserved it 57 168

Today, I found out that the dream in which I drunkenly phoned my boss and called him a "fat useless piece of shit" actually did happen. I woke up to 10 missed calls and 5 angry texts stating I was fired. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 566

You deserved it 3 239

Today, I went back home for a visit after nearly 10 years. I met up with some old friends at a bar and had an amazing evening. Afterwards, two of the wives told me I’m never allowed to speak to, nor see their husbands again, since I slept with them in high school. This was years before they even met. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 152

You deserved it 215

Today, I discovered that if I put my ankles on my boyfriend's shoulders while we are having sex, I will pee myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 550

You deserved it 13 821