Today, I was in the ER where I work as a registrar. A patient received a plastic urinal to use in his room. Most patients throw them away when they leave. He, however, decided to take it with him, and as he checked out, put it on the registration counter. Two feet from my face. It was used. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Same thing different taste
Today, while checking the men's bathroom at work, I noticed one of the air fresheners had fallen from the top of the paper towel holder into the garbage. It wasn't until I picked it up and examined it that I realized I was actually holding used urinal fresheners. FML
We could be heroes
Today, I was at work at my local hospital. I went to the toilet to empty my bladder; the door was half open so I assumed it was empty. Upon opening the door, I was greeted with a half naked old man, who then yelled at me and violently shat himself, all over the walls and floor. FML
Today, I was at work at the library and a patron handed me some change. When I asked what it was for, he said he had found it in one of the urinals. FML
Today, I was headed towards the unisex bathroom at physical therapy when another patient looked up at me and quickly looked away. I knew instantly and prepared for the smell, but I wasn't expecting remnants still floating in the toilet. FML
Today, I once again had to tell one of my elderly patients not to grope me. He responded by throwing his bedpan at me. It was full. FML
Today, my patient knocked my glasses off as I assisted him in the shower. We both looked in terror as they fell into his unflushed toilet. This patient was isolated due to a contagious infection. FML
Sneaky
Today, I was on the toilet at work. After a very loud and very smelly session, I waited until the other stall had been vacated to keep my anonymity. As I leant forward for some toilet roll, my ID fell out of my pocket and into the next stall. When I came out, it was face up near the sink. FML
Thanks, asshole
Today, I was in a bathroom stall and someone had left their dirty tampon rolled up in toilet paper on the top of the paper dispenser. I felt obligated to dispose of it, so the next person didn't think I left it, because there was a line for the stalls. Fuck you, asshole. FML
Today, changing the garbage in the bathroom at work resulted in a hospital visit after an incorrectly disposed used needle scraped into my thigh. FML
Today, I was taking a dump at a public restroom. As I reached over to grab the toilet paper, I realized someone had peed on it. FML
Top comments
cradle6 13
Two feet? What, you wanted it closer?
iAmScrubs 19
Guys, guys, guys. Stop arguing and look on the bright side... Well, there is no bright side.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (72)
steelman112 1
Stop complaining. You work in a hospital it's to be expected to be around things like that.
KunKaLunKa 1
Yum
ikickgingers 15
If I had a dick I would do the same!! Road trips would be that much easier.
perdix 31
This is the FML that screams out for a Crowded House reference: "Try to catch the deluge in a paper cup..."
mistersheezy 7
Was it empty? Either way it's gross, but was it?
False_Stupidity 42
The FML says it was used.. so what do you think?
zowieandzander77 1
Used and full of piss are 2 dif things.
ScarletBloom 14
So what happen next?
perdix 31
I was waiting with bated breath for the part where it spilled. Damn you, 300 character limit!
Angelrose2004 17
He (or his insurance) paid for it... No reason to throw away something he could use at home... Just sayin.
pondermuse 5
Surely you've been trained to deal with shit like that. It's just piss, so put on one of them kinky plastic gloves on and dispose of it as any other professional in the same room would.
structuredchaoz 4
If you work in a hospital. You better worry more about what you can't see, than something silly like a urinal. The pen people sign out with has more germs. I promise.
mieks 18
Thats gross but don't you see a lot of worse things there?