Today, I was at the doctors office after throwing up for the past week. My diagnosis? Apparently I'm the first pregnant man. After several minutes of me freaking out and him explaining how it was possible, he told me he was joking and that I'm fine, but my reaction was the best thus far. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I went to the doctor, because I've been having stomach pains and nausea for weeks. He ended up gravely telling me I'm pregnant. I freaked out and panicked about what my parents would say. Then his laughter reminded me that I'm a guy. A really stupid one. FML
Today, I told my husband I was pregnant, then he fainted. FML
Today, my doctor told me I'm pregnant. Since we've been trying for several years, I called my husband to tell him the good news. Not long after, my doctor called to inform me there'd been a clerical mix-up and I'm not actually pregnant after all. FML
Today, I went to the doctor's office for a minor cold, and left with a diagnosis of pregnancy. FML
Today, I announced my pregnancy to my boss. I was expecting all sorts of reactions, except, "But... Erm... How did that happen?" FML
Today, I excitedly told my husband that I'm pregnant with our first child. With the most shit-eating grin, he said, "Hi, Pregnant. I'm Dad." FML
Today, I went to the doctor's office after getting a positive pregnancy test. She did another one to confirm the result, which came back negative. My husband is wandering around with a great big smile on his face, because he isn't going to "have a rugrat." FML
Today, I found out that I'm not actually pregnant. I've apparently been having a hysterical pregnancy because I want a child so badly. I don't know which was worse, the look of relief on my husband's face or having to send a mass email to inform my family and friends. FML
Today, at work, someone heard me throw up. I then got called aside and told being hungover at work is unacceptable. I don't drink. I'm pregnant. FML
Today, I was feeling really sick at work. I messaged my boss whether his girlfriend, who also works there, could cover me. He then came down, shouting at me that whatever illness I have, I've also passed on to his girlfriend. I'm pregnant. FML
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Top comments
benr_fml 0
that's just funny
Jimboom 12
Hand in your testicles at the door please sir. You are way to dumb and gullible to be a man.
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Comments (162)
starile 20
OP didn't day say anything about what his reaction was, so we have no idea what he did to earn "Best Reaction" :(
MissErikaHart 0
he was freaking out. imagine it.
frozzenhart 0
He vomitted , is that so hard to guess ?
gracieroxursox 3
he didnt vomit because the doctor told him, he went to the doctor because he had been throwing up
kawigurl 0
lmao! What a great doctor! wish everyone had a sense of humor like that!
RedPillSucks 33
Unless you're a hermaphrodite, I'm not sure why you would fall for this?
far0057 0
your black, you wouldn't understand.
hidingoutt7 0
FAKE
Quest_ 13
Of course you deserve it for being that stupid. People like you are a personal joke between all the people with IQs over 80.
mintcar 10
Stupid much? Ugh!
like_its_ya_bday 0
lmao ydi
TailsThePrower71 4
His name wasn't Hibbert was it?
Iskaria 0
*Hibbert chuckle*
xClairex_fml 1
may I said that you're ridiculously dumb for believing it!
marinus_fml 20
Would you like me to sing "sweet kitty, soft kitty" while you're sick in bed? Props to who gets the reference.
marinus_fml 20
Not what I was referring to.. actually, never heard if it.
yake12 0
big bang theory is awesome
Quasar_fml 0
Sweet kitty, soft kitty, little kitty purrrr... lol sheldon :P
Quest_ 13
Enough with your Big Bang propaganda. The reference was clearly from Highway *****.
Iskaria 0
The reference of being sick in bed and having it sung is Big Bang Theory... 'little ball of fuuuur'