Today, I sharted. While I was naked. Standing on a new carpet in my girlfriend's bedroom. In front of my girlfriend. FML
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Top comments
By
whiskey'swino
| 15
Never trust a fart.
By
Rabite
| 28
How does this keep happening?
COMMENTS
By
RipperoniPizza
| 19
Sounds like a shitty situation.
By
bogolopian
| 12
Is your girlfriend that scary?
Reply
Rozay333
| 34
This is underrated lmao
By
RichardPencil
| 29
Either your dump got you dumped and shit-ton of carpet cleaning expenses, or you’ve just entered into the weird, wild world of scat.
Reply
Might0fHeaven
| 10
Yea because sharting is the number one cause of people breaking up
Reply
RichardPencil
| 29
Really? I’d have guessed number two.
By
melisssa87
| 30
That’s why you just hold it in
By
kirby1964
| 20
This why you not drink hard liquor.
By
whiskey'swino
| 15
Never trust a fart.
By
BurnInDemonFire
| 30
I fucking hate things like this. "It's performance art." "I'm expressing myself through the visual medium of my work." "I once did a one man show for the Queen." It's attention-seeking bullshit, and you fucking know it.
Reply
Dave_Davington
| 33
If your friends regularly shit on your floor and try to pass it off as art, know that that is not typical human behaviour and you should probably seek a new group of friends as soon as possible.
Reply
BurnInDemonFire
| 30
My friends don't shit on the carpet while they're naked. They do it in their wedding dresses.
By
Rabite
| 28
How does this keep happening?
Reply
Dave_Davington
| 33
Kids these days have no sphincter control. Why, back in my day, we could eat a ten course Indian feast and maintain a completely watertight seal, and dammit, that's the way we liked it.
Reply
Rabite
| 28
Yeah, srsly, what's up with their buttholes?
By
Insanegd
| 4
Never trust a fart.
By
Abbusser
| 9
Maybe she won't notice?