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Ex-husband? Hopefully.

Normally I would say not to jump into divorcing or breaking up with someone but In this case I think that's exactly what OP needs to do not only is he cheating but he's doing it with someone from their marriage counseling class a place where they are suppose to be trying to save their marriage and by the sounds of things OP'S husband has no interest in doing that.

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Ex-husband? Hopefully.

Normally I would say not to jump into divorcing or breaking up with someone but In this case I think that's exactly what OP needs to do not only is he cheating but he's doing it with someone from their marriage counseling class a place where they are suppose to be trying to save their marriage and by the sounds of things OP'S husband has no interest in doing that.

At first, I thought they should work it out. But, #30, you completely changed my mind!

Think its time to admit it just won't work out. What a jerk.

Hopefully it wasn't the actual counselor right? Either way your husband is a d-bag.

Really, what difference does that make? Cheating is cheating.

Cheating is cheating and wrong either way, but there's a special hell for a person who takes money to save a marriage and deliberately tears it apart instead.

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nonsensical 26

you've commented a lot on this FML, seems like you're talking to yourself

Had an ex-wife who did something very similar. Spent a long time being angry both during the remainder the marriage and for a couple years afterwards. When you are able to finally walk away emotionally and not just physically you make yourself a lot happier

to actually move on be happy, you kinda have to move on and be happy..

19990231 29

What impeccable logic. Must have taken deep thought to come up with that.

Not the counsellor I hope? Hate those teachers pets types

It could have been worse. He could have been sleeping with one of the men in the group

I don't think that's any worse. They're just as bad

cheating is cheating no matter what genders are involved

It is worse when you find out the whole basis of the relationship was a misrepresentation, even down to the sexuality of your partner. Not only was the relationship over, but what you had was only a cover for his real preferences. I'm not judging the lifestyle I'm suggesting that would be a deeper betrayal.

Just because someone cheats on their partner with someone of the opposite sex doesn't mean their relationship was a cover up.

It's called bisexuality

And if it was with the same-sex partner it's homosexuality or bisexuality. If it wasn't something you knew about your partner before that can be a bigger betrayal

I agree with you ab I've been cheated on a lot and the most painful time was and still is when a guy cheated on me with another guy and I had no idea he swung that way it made me feel like something I did made him like guys that it was my fault

To be honest if I found out that my SO was gay or bi or trans that way I believe I would have more sympathy for him than if he cheated on me with another woman.

Are you stupid or something?

if you're bisexual, you are bisexual whether your partner is the same sex or not, you're still bisexual, you don't change preference. cheating is cheating, whether it's with the same sex or not, there is no worse betrayal in a relationship, cheating is cheating

let that boat sink to the bottom of the ocean, you try patching the holes but clearly it isn't you with the issues

Is it safe to assume that the counseling isn't going very well?

Is cheating the reason you went to counseling group in the first place? Or is it a new phenomenon? But overall I guess in this case you either decide to go to individual couples counseling to avoid such situations, or you just make up your mind and throw in the towel and move on to divorce.

I agree, and I'd also like to ask who thought that a bunch of people struggling with their marriages should be part of a group like that? Maybe it's just me, but I think that a set up like that is bound to lead to trouble, because people whose relationships with their own partners are at a low point are exposed to people they might see as more sympathetic than their own partner. Individual counseling is the way to go, IMO.

Well, I guess you know what to talk about at your next meeting, huh? Seriously, though, they deserve to be called out at the very least. You also need to find out where your husband and the other woman went wrong and why they felt the need to cheat. Your marriage can't get better unless you talk about it and get to the root of the problem.