Today, I asked a girl I liked for her number, but she claimed she had a broken phone and was getting a new one for Christmas. Unhinged, I go home and go onto Facebook. First thing I see is her status: "Why is no one answering my calls?" FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, this girl I liked made her Facebook status "Nobody texts me anymore, message me numbers?" I commented that I texted her. She deleted it and changed it to "Nobody that I care about texts me anymore, message me numbers?" FML
Today, my girlfriend told me on Facebook to stop calling/texting her because she lost her phone. Right under her post was "sent from Facebook for iPhone." FML
Today, I rang my girlfriend to make sure she made it home alright. She told me to check my Facebook. Nothing was different so I hit refresh. We were no longer in a relationship. I got dumped via Facebook whilst on the phone to her. FML
Today, my girlfriend was in a pissy mood because she said none of her friends have been texting to check on her lately since she changed her number. I asked if she gave the new number out. She said that no, she wanted to see who cared enough to call and ask for her new number. She doesn’t get it. FML
Today, I went to a rock concert and met this amazing girl. We started talking and then swapped cell numbers. Five minutes later, she asks to see my cellphone, so I gave it to her. Once I got home I went to text her and saw that she deleted her number. FML
Today, my phone decided to delete all my numbers. I posted on Facebook that people should message or text me if they felt like I should have their number. I didn't get a single reply. FML
Today, a girl with her eyes glued to her phone bumped my arm going in the opposite direction on the sidewalk. She dropped her phone, chased me to the bus stop, and told everyone that I broke it. She threatened to call the police. FML
Today, I fucked up when I answered a phone call. I wasn't sure who the number was at first, and it turned out to be my ex girlfriend who had apparently been stalking me. She asked me how my new girlfriend was, and as I answered it in front of my girlfriend, she's now depressed. FML
Today, I finally got the girl of my dreams' phone number. After texting her "Hey, is this Stephanie?" I got response saying "Sorry bro, I know how you feel, she did the same thing to me." FML
Today, I changed my relationship status on Facebook from "in a relationship" to "single." I forgot to take my phone to work, and when I got back, I saw someone had replied, "What happened?" Someone else commented, "He broke his hand." My ex and a bunch of other "friends" liked it. FML
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Top comments
xenomorph 0
No one's answering her calls --> her phone may be broken
Elf_My_Life 0
Suck to be you. xP How do you know it isn't her home phone she's talking about eh?
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Comments (149)
JessKayy 0
there is such a thing as a land line, you know.
GreenRupee 0
Probably her home phone? I'm not allowed to give that number away either.
natizakhi 0
hey retard, ever heard of a house phone? oh thats right, you live in a cesspool so you wouldnt have one! YOU ******* SHIT EATING ****!
purpledraaaaaank 0
maybe her phone was broken and nobody could answer her calls and thats why she didn't give you the number
icanfloat12 0
trust me, u don't want a girl like that.
momma_b 0
ever think that maybe her CELL phone is broken and she's calling people from her HOME phone?
CoffeeCovered 0
That was my first thought. I mean, people still have home phones...
teiso_fml 0
Asking a girl for her number and her giving some excuse isn't exactly an FML. Do you honestly believe every girl's excuse when you ask for their number?
yougotxmads 0
I just think her life sucks not yours, only because no one was answering her calls haha.
Vertebrae 0
What? Kill the bitch
Vertebrae 0
Oh damn it said "please try and be respectful" ...should've edited