Today, I actually had to teach my 9-year-old brother how to pour himself a glass of milk, after he burst out in tears when my sister told him to do it himself. His astonishing ignorance also extends to basic hygiene. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I saw my little brother drink from the milk carton, gag, and spit the milk back in. FML
Today, I had to supervise my 9 year-old nephew taking a shower, because he won't wash with soap or shampoo unless someone makes him. Instead, he blows three-inch-long green and brown boogers out of his nose that dangle from his nostril. He's disgusting and hasn't even hit puberty yet. This is future of the world. FML
Today, I went to the bathroom after my 9 year-old nephew. Apparently nobody taught him to lift the seat when he pees, or how to aim properly, because when I sat down, I sat in his pee. FML
Today, I taught my 12-year-old brothers that showering cannot be used as a substitute for deodorant, and that they should use both. One of them was almost in tears. FML
Today, my baby brother learned to remove his nappy. He immediately used this new skill to shit all over my room. FML
Today, I had to teach my 16-year-old brother how to use a toaster. He thought you just plug it in and wait for it to "pre-heat." FML
Today, we ran out of milk and my 4 year-old son came up to me and asked if he could "milk" my wife's breasts for his cereal. Apparently, he thinks my wife doesn't love him and his sister is selfish for not sharing her milk. His sister is only one month old. FML
Today, my brother learned how to fake cry. I've been catching shit for everything I've done and said near him ever since. FML
Today, my 10 year old brother caught me masturbating and then said "Oh, so that's how you do it!". He then ran to his room and locked the door. I inadvertently taught my little brother how to masturbate. FML
Today, I was at the store with my kids. My 5-year-old son wanted to carry the milk carton, so I let him. He dropped it and it spilled. I was really embarrassed. Then he decided to get on the floor and lick the milk off the ground. Everyone stared at me accusingly. FML
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Top comments
grumpybr 13
Parents not doing a good job uh?
cuppycakeslove 20
Why haven't your parents taught him?
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Comments (115)
harrietawesomer 3
so parent your dang kid better. You're the reason he is a spoiled drain on the planet.
Phyre24 17
Hey 81, do you not know how to read properly? The OP said "brother" you moron.
msarosi 14
this reminded me of in the movie home alone when Kevin is told he has to pack his own suitcase, haha, fyl.
tishtashbat 16
I met a girl this year who was 18 and did not know how to make pasta. She didn't know how to use the hob, let alone that pasta is boiled on the hob. I also know a guy who at the age of 20 didn't know how to clean a shower. They both come from privileged backgrounds where someone else has always done these things for them. It seems that either this child is spoilt, or he needs to be paid more attention. Either way, he needs to start learning to do some things on his own.
jabi3jabi3 8
hopefully it will sink in.
tbenson0628 14
Hello. He's 9. Not 15. He's still by all accounts a child, lighten the **** up OP. my 8 yr. old sister has to be constantly reminded of hygiene stuff and how to do certain things. they aren't old enough quite yet to comprehend why these things are important.
sweetlilly1812 6
That's not your nephews fault, it's your sisters.
fantasyworld 39
He's Op's brother.
b_free_8 9
That's sounds exactly like my 9 year old sister!! Shes such a brat lol
DaGinsta 9
OMG MY BROTHER TOO HE WON'T EVEN PIT ON SUNSCREEN WITHOUT MY HELP!!!!!!
baref00tmama 15
Your parents need to be teaching him more basic life skills. My four-year-old can pour his own milk! (not if it's in a gallon jug though-too heavy).
megnog 11
I have the same exact problem. My little brother is 13 and is still struggling to wash his own hair and put peanut butter on his own sandwiches.