Today, an elderly gentleman came into my store complaining of a toothache, so I showed him where the Orajel was located. He then insisted on making a big scene, claiming that I really had the magic touch and if I would just stroke his cheek all his pain would go away. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I had a toothache and applied some numbing gel to soothe the pain. Too much came out and made my whole mouth numb. A man came into my work, thought I was making fun of his lisp, and stormed out really upset. He later called to complain about me. The boss just called me to his office. FML
Today, a patient came to the ER at 4 a.m., but left complaining I wasn't treating him properly. I treated his toothache with painkillers that would get him through the night so he could contact a dentist the next day. He showed me a TikTok video of the tooth surgery that he supposedly needed instead. FML
Today, at work, I put on a smile and went to take an elderly gentleman's order. He looked at me, asked if I'd stick a finger in his sweet tea to make it sweeter, then complained that it was a shame I wasn't "on the menu". FML
Today, my manager took me aside and angrily told me to quit fucking about with our customers. He totally refuses to believe that the slight whistling sound I keep making when I exhale is because I have a chipped tooth. FML
Today, I was at my job where we buy precious metals. A man came in and said, "Here, I have something special for you." He then pulled a tooth out of his mouth that had dental gold on it and placed in it my bare hand. Yeah, special indeed. FML
Today, I was treating a patient at the hospital where I'm a dentist. This particular gentleman was old and slightly deaf. After completing the procedure I gestured to the spitoon and asked him to spit. He got up, steadied himself, and spat straight in my face. FML
Today, I went to the dentist to get a tooth filled. The nurse just finished taking my info when the doctor came in and started drilling. Through my chorus of screams he realized he'd forgotten to numb me. His only response was, "Guess I forgot to numb ya, huh?" while giggling. FML
Today, at my dental practice, we received a shipment of the stupid flavoured gloves my boss ordered to make the place more "friendly to the kids". I started working in an adult patient's mouth, when he decided to start creepily making out with my fingers. FML
Today, I went to the dentist to get a cavity filled. The numbing medication didn't work, so I felt everything. I was in so much pain that I accidentally bit down on the dentist's finger, causing him to yell in agony. Now, I have to find a new dentist. FML
Today, at my store, I had an old man violently accuse me of charging him for an extra pack of 99¢ Mounds candy yesterday. He held up my line for 10 minutes, fighting me about it. I didn't even work yesterday. FML
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Top comments
I_iz_B_a_troll 24
Well I hope you stroked it for him... His cheek I mean.
ManInTheMachine 20
I would just play along, and be a good employee. Unless the next thing he asks for is the Viagra. Then get your manager, and a restraining order.
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Comments (88)
GayMatt 22
could have pretended to stroke him and just slap him
kierabehr 8
I would have hid away in the back of the store xD
BellaFurfaro 12
Did you do it?
buckdharma 38
Ya know I did it.
iamzsdawgy 6
Did you do it?
buckdharma 38
I said I did it.
krakhd 15
word must get around fast. you should be more discreet.
ViviMage 40
I'm sure unless you're a massage therapist or the like, and not a store clerk, you could get fired for that special touch.
steve_o_009 2
So you found the real Herbert the Pervert?
whoknew1 3
looks like your the second coming of Jesus. Can you turn my the water in my pool into wine?
jasperated 13
OP here, sad to say this is not the most disturbing run-in with a male customer that I've faced in my 4 months on this new job. Apparently Omaha, NE is where perverts come to die. I didn't stroke his cheek so he carried on for about 4 minutes about my customer service skills until my supervisor came
TheMystery13 13
And it didn't occur to you to slap him?