Miscellaneous: Today, after letting my roommate borrow a spoon the previous...

This is a Nearly FML. It’s an FML, nearly. It got positive votes from the users, by wasn’t approved by our team.

By Seriously? - 09/03/2016 10:57 - China - Shanghai

Today, after letting my roommate borrow a spoon the previous evening to eat her take out food, I woke up this morning to find it placed neatly on my laptop keyboard...unwashed. FML.

I agree, your life sucks 2

You deserved it 1

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Top comments

No comments yet.

Comments

No comments yet.

Keywords

Annoying Gamers Video games Money Birthday Cute Kids Weird Awkward Love Health Abuse Relatable Social Media Scams Education Parents School Teenagers Anger issues Family Relationship advice Capitalism Miscellaneous Public freakouts Mental health Grieving Music Geek Poopoo peepee

The Top

Today, I found out that morning after pills don't work if you're already ovulating. I also found out that I might become a father wayyyy sooner than expected. FML

I agree, your life sucks 125

You deserved it 533

Today, we had two of our longest serving coworkers retire at the company I work at, and they hired two young prospects to replace them. The problem? They asked me to train them both for the next 4 months, cancelling my PTO in the process, and then I learned they were being paid nearly 20% more than I am. FML

I agree, your life sucks 561

You deserved it 78

The Top

Today, outraged about the high gas prices, I thought it would be funny to buy some stickers of Joe Biden saying, “I did that” to put them on the gas pumps next to the prices. I was caught by the owner, and am no longer welcome in that gas station for “vandalism.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 333

You deserved it 2 955

Today, I was able to check my voicemail and email for the first time in two weeks. The only message I got was from my landlord telling me that the house I'm renting is in foreclosure, and I needed to have all my stuff out in ten days. He left the message nine days ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 309

You deserved it 5 787

Today, my husband asked if we could try food play during sex. I okayed it, thinking it would be the standard squirty cream or chocolate sauce. Let’s just say I was not expecting him to be eating crispy bacon and blue cheese sauce off my boobs. Good Lord, I married a weirdo. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 188

You deserved it 526

Today, for my two month anniversary, my boyfriend surprised me with a "present". He then lifted his pant leg. He had carved my initials into his leg with a knife. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 541

You deserved it 5 336

Today, my father went missing. Naturally worried, we searched his workplace, hospitals, and other locations. Turns out he got arrested for driving around town drunk out of his mind. Oh, and it's my birthday. Thanks for throwing me a great (search) party, dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 375

You deserved it 984

Today, I was outside at a café when I looked at my phone. As I did, a woman halfway across the patio started screaming at me, demanding I tell her who I was texting and why. She then sprinted over, furious at me for apparently badmouthing her to somebody. All I did was check the time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 920

You deserved it 2 944