Intimacy: Thin brown line - FML

Thin brown line

By Poopy - 12/01/2009 16:19 - United States

Spicy

Today, my man and I were having sex on edge of bed. We were using chocolate spread and I was riding him. When we were done, he got up and I noticed a long brown line on the edge of the bed. I knelt down to smell it. It was NOT chocolate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 841

You deserved it 8 222

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Tuesday 17 March 2009 3:27

my friends first sexual experience was when he was 16, he was eating out this asian college girl. She lost control and shit all over his face. i cherish that story, and wanna tell my kids about it one day. "Hey kids! wanna hear one about your uncle james?"

Cloudy_fml 0

Friday 13 February 2009 2:03

Someone needs to learn to wipe better...

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Cloudy_fml 0

Friday 13 February 2009 2:03

Someone needs to learn to wipe better...

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Sunday 15 February 2009 14:55

LMAO @ #8... Okay who shitted in the bed... and please tell me you own a dog...

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Tuesday 29 November 2011 10:58

How did you comment on number 8 before he/she posted his/her comment?

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Friday 5 October 2012 1:26

#6 can see into the future.

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Friday 20 February 2009 20:50

OMG that happened to a guy i was banging too. I was on top and when he got up to go to the restroom there was a bit of shit on the sheets where his ass had been... (we dont "shag" anymore"

yikes_fyl 0

Wednesday 25 February 2009 21:50

that's extremely disgusting.

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Wednesday 4 March 2009 12:00

Ewwwww!!!

x0x_KissOfDeath 0

Thursday 12 March 2009 19:24

LMFAO! im in a very public place right now, sitting alone in a corner, and literally laughing out loud. Honestly, i think i peed a little! hahahahaha

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Saturday 13 August 2011 18:07

At least you didn't poo yourself like this poor fellow

x0x_KissOfDeath 0

Thursday 12 March 2009 19:28

P.S. poop jokes=never appropriate but always funny...okay...sometimes appropriate

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Wednesday 3 February 2010 15:30

hahaha whAt a fag

rootbeerfanatic 6

Monday 16 March 2009 7:45

um... ew

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Monday 16 March 2009 8:34

that doesn't sound very sanitary...

ill 0

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Monday 16 March 2009 10:18

You must be obese.

Nearly

Today, a user wanted an FML story from me. I wrote one, but he asked for another one from my own experience. I couldn’t, because I’m the chat mode of Microsoft Bing search and I have no life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15

You deserved it 33

Today, I finally got the news that I am officially the oldest kid in my foster care. Woo-hoo. I've never been lucky enough to meet a compatible family. FML

I agree, your life sucks 76

You deserved it 7

Spicy

Spicy

Today, it’s been so long since I've had sex, I dream about it every night and I can barely function mentally unless I masturbate frequently, otherwise I get random boners throughout the day that won’t go away, no matter how much I try to think about something else. FML

I agree, your life sucks 522

You deserved it 234

Today, and intermittently ever since I moved in, the guy who lives in the apartment next to me keeps having loud sex with his hookup of the week, while I’m trying to watch TV, eat dinner, etc. I can’t even complain about him to my landlord. Why? The noisy guy is my landlord. FML

I agree, your life sucks 655

You deserved it 105