By Anonymous - 24/3/2020 19:15

The Outsider

Today, I realized I am ‘that person’ in the group when I was only added to the group chat 6 weeks after it was created. I don’t really see a point in trying to chime in to the conversation at this point, but leaving the group seems a bit dramatic. FML

I agree, your life sucks

1367

You deserved it

197

Tweet

Share

Race against the clock

That'll be Kevin in accounting

This is fine

By Worst Way To Get Promoted - 25/9/2019 16:00

Promoted!

Today, I walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room of our restaurant. I pretended I didn't see him and quickly closed the door. About five minutes later, he came out, cupped my face in his hands and told me I was getting promoted. I'm happy, but scarred for life. FML

I agree, your life sucks

1878

You deserved it

137

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - 1/3/2012 16:37 - New Zealand

Today, I missed an important phone call. It's been so long since someone has called me that I didn't recognize my own ringtone. FML

I agree, your life sucks

27409

You deserved it

4362

Tweet

Share

By pam - 3/12/2008 05:04 - France

Today, I said thanks to a man who got up for me in the bus. He angrily said "no, not you!". The old lady who sat down is now staring at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks

23101

You deserved it

7902

Tweet

Share

By lea5459 - 20/11/2012 06:47 - United States - Medford

Today, my parents kindly told me what they are getting me for my 18th birthday. An eviction notice. FML

I agree, your life sucks

24566

You deserved it

3351

Tweet

Share

By Mug - 24/4/2012 20:15 - United Kingdom

Today, my boss made me work a longer shift than usual. Not because he needed me in, but just so I'd finish at the same time as his brat of a son, and give him a lift home. FML

I agree, your life sucks

28603

You deserved it

2133

Tweet

Share

By branwen5 - 9/10/2009 02:26 - United States

Today, I had my final divorce proceeding. The judge denied my divorce because my husband is unemployed. I can't get a divorce until he gets a job to pay child support. He hasn't had a job for 3 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks

44575

You deserved it

3815

Tweet

Share

By soundslikeadumbcommentersituation - 11/7/2014 20:34 - Canada - Brampton

Today, while in my backyard, I had some insane gastric distress. I let out a fart so powerful that it made me yelp in pain, and left my asshole numb. A second later, I heard a cough come from over my neighbor's fence. I had to quietly limp back into my house in shame. FML

I agree, your life sucks

45563

You deserved it

6897

Tweet

Share

By sandra22 - 22/1/2011 08:49 - France

Today, while skiing, I really needed to pee. The instructor pointed me towards some bushes. I slid over to them, and pulled my panties down. My skis then started sliding back down the slope. I ended up gliding through the bushes, all the way down to the rest of the group. FML

I agree, your life sucks

32873

You deserved it

8260

Tweet

Share

By panicromanceX3 - 26/4/2009 08:44 - United States

Today, my friends and I spent hours on the Disney website playing in Pixie Hollow. We made our own fairies and flew around completing tasks for TinkerBell and her fairy friends. We're in college, and this is how we spent our Saturday night. FML

I agree, your life sucks

28814

You deserved it

63311

Tweet

Share

By ButImBeautiful - 4/2/2017 02:00 - United Kingdom - Cheltenham

Today, a little girl came up to me and told me I looked like a foot. Thanks a bunch, darling. FML

I agree, your life sucks

6309

You deserved it

548

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - 9/2/2016 16:54 - United States - Richmond

Today, some jackass decided that using the back of my car to slow down was easier than using his brakes. FML

I agree, your life sucks

19815

You deserved it

1331

Tweet

Share

By faeliality - 16/4/2017 16:00

Today, after finally getting my drivers license, I was able to drive myself to school for the first time! I got fined $50 for accidentally parking in the wrong lot. FML

I agree, your life sucks

4059

You deserved it

1849

Tweet

Share

By melonhead - 14/1/2010 08:46 - Australia

Today, my friends thought it would be funny to try and break a watermelon on my head while I was asleep on the couch. FML

I agree, your life sucks

34753

You deserved it

3704

Tweet

Share

By ShampooThief - 12/4/2015 03:05 - United States

Today, my family checked into a hotel for spring break. The first thing my brother did was steal all the bars of soap and bottles of shampoo. He's now guarding them, and hissing at anyone that tries to take them. I just want to take a shower. FML

I agree, your life sucks

30564

You deserved it

2994

Tweet

Share

By HDCkid - 5/4/2009 08:48 - United States

Today, I met a new client in person for the first time. When I went to shake his hand, it was made of plastic. Startled, I laughed thinking it was a practical joke. It wasn't. FML

I agree, your life sucks

18530

You deserved it

62788

Tweet

Share

By klm878 - 13/11/2010 04:10 - United States

Today, at work, my manager fell in front of an entire lobby full of people on a wet floor. I'm the only one who burst out laughing. Turns out she has a broken arm. FML

I agree, your life sucks

10943

You deserved it

37634

Tweet

Share

By Anonynonynon - 13/2/2015 19:05 - United States - Kansas City

Today, I'm working for a company that makes over a million dollars a year, yet leaves me with no choice but to pee in a cup because they won't pay to fix the only toilet in the building. FML

I agree, your life sucks

31668

You deserved it

2405

Tweet

Share

By dumbo - 30/7/2009 14:43 - United States

Today, my friends had ditched me for a party I hadn't been invited to so I was sitting home alone. The only other thing in my house was the mosquito I nicknamed Fred. I liked to watch Fred fly around and try to suck my blood. 20 minutes later, I found Fred's dead body. I was actually sad. FML

I agree, your life sucks

63764

You deserved it

18868

Tweet

Share

By DeeGirlMon - 3/8/2012 05:24 - Canada - Calgary

Today, the coworker I've had a crush on for the past few months asked me if I was busy Friday night. I was so excited, I immediately replied, "I thought you'd never ask!" He gave me a funny look and said, "Good, because I need you to take my shift." FML

I agree, your life sucks

27417

You deserved it

5964

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - 16/1/2016 04:16 - United Kingdom

Today, my dad made me figure out how to disable the adult content filters on our internet. He spent what must have been a full 10 minutes on a distracting, long-winded speech about how he doesn't want to look up porn, but "it's just the principle of the damn thing". Sure, dad. Sure. FML

I agree, your life sucks

20731

You deserved it

1637

Tweet

Share

By Meh - 18/7/2009 15:51 - United States

Today, I was surprising my husband because our sex life is lacking. We have planned sex tuesday night, every week, with the lights off. When he came home for lunch, I was nude and waiting for him. He took one look and said, "I forgot you looked like that. Meh, I'm going back to work." FML

I agree, your life sucks

76777

You deserved it

8488

Tweet

Share

By will - 14/8/2019 12:00 - Canada

Today, my 6-year-old son apparently decided to make a game out of clogging the toilet with toilet paper. He won, and now the whole basement is flooded. FML

I agree, your life sucks

1398

You deserved it

189

Tweet

Share

By Sucker - 1/7/2018 01:30

* facepalm *

Today, five hours into my shift, I found out that I had been given the day off. They just forgot to tell me. FML

I agree, your life sucks

3987

You deserved it

297

Tweet

Share

By Anon - 23/7/2015 11:53 - United States - Sacramento

Today, I spent $70 on party supplies for my sister's bachelorette party, another hour decorating, three hours baking and designing a cake, before waiting five hours to hear that she and another bridesmaid had 'moved' the party elsewhere. Cake anyone? FML

I agree, your life sucks

31420

You deserved it

1906

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - 18/8/2011 07:42 - United States

Today, I was sitting in my cubicle at work, nursing a hangover, and thinking how stupid I was for getting so shit-faced last night. I then realized that I was voicing my thoughts out loud, and the whole office had gone quiet, listening to me castigate myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks

12013

You deserved it

39264

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - 25/1/2014 01:29 - United States - Petaluma

Today, I'm a 34 year old male who just got given the sex talk on my Facebook timeline by my senile mother. 5ML

I agree, your life sucks

52399

You deserved it

5730

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - 4/9/2019 16:03

Driven

Today, I drove 3 hours to get to a class, just to have the professor leave a note on the classroom door saying that she wasn't coming. FML

I agree, your life sucks

1534

You deserved it

101

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - 4/10/2009 04:06 - United States

Today, I went to my Homecoming dance. I had a great time until some fat girl kept trying to dance with my date, even though he politely asked her to stop. I decided to intervene. I found myself pinned to the floor by a fat girl crushing on my date, who was cheering her on as she tackled me. FML

I agree, your life sucks

43617

You deserved it

8647

Tweet

Share

By maybe next time? - 14/9/2016 11:57 - Australia - Greystanes

Today, I was participating in an activity to join a program which I really wanted to join. One of the teachers in charge seemed to notice my efforts and asked if I wanted to join the program. I said yes, thinking I had a chance. She laughed, shook her head before saying no and walking away. FML

I agree, your life sucks

12429

You deserved it

882

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - 10/9/2009 06:02 - United States

Today, I got stuck in an elevator for 45 minutes. I am an elevator mechanic. FML

I agree, your life sucks

42521

You deserved it

6929

Tweet

Share

By mississippi123 - 6/8/2012 05:41 - United States - Fullerton

Today, I discovered how pathetically introverted I am when during a car ride with my family, I said, "I really like this song" and my parents gasped because they didn't realize I was in the back seat. And I'm their only child. FML

I agree, your life sucks

30876

You deserved it

2520

Tweet

Share

By anonymous - 14/8/2011 01:17 - United States

Today, my 14-year-old son was terrified of going into the water near our house, because he was scared of having his leg bitten off by a shark. We live by a lake. I tried explaining why it couldn't happen, but he just cowered behind a beach towel. FML

I agree, your life sucks

30077

You deserved it

4770

Tweet

Share

By Noname - 6/3/2009 19:13 - United States

Today, I found out my four best friends are going to Florida for spring break without me. When asked why I was not invited to go with them the answer I received was, "we don't think you would look very good in a bathing suit, and we want to be able to pick up cute guys on the beach." FML

I agree, your life sucks

69471

You deserved it

6401

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - 15/10/2012 10:28 - United States - Richmond

Today, I learned from my daughter's teacher that she has been wearing the same shirt for the past few weeks, ever since we had a fight about how I don't pay attention to her. FML

I agree, your life sucks

8449

You deserved it

63022

Tweet

Share

By sari14 - 11/2/2010 06:14 - United States

Today, I was standing at the top of the stairs petting my dog. The doorbell rang and my dog bolted down the stairs, tripping me. I fell down the whole flight of stairs backwards. Turns out the person at the door was my brother who had locked himself out. I almost died for no reason. FML

I agree, your life sucks

27063

You deserved it

5005

Tweet

Share

By icarlypoop - 11/4/2020 23:00

Good impressions last

Today, I threw up on my crush's lawn. FML

I agree, your life sucks

1146

You deserved it

425

Tweet

Share

By aherdofpigs - 2/9/2013 19:22 - United States

Today, I'm trapped in my apartment. My new cat won't let me leave. Every time I try, he blocks the door, hisses and tries to savage me. I'm my own cat's bitch. FML

I agree, your life sucks

49993

You deserved it

21019

Tweet

Share

By SupermarketSally - 25/11/2016 13:45 - Australia - Perth

Today, a customer threw a bottle of milk at me because we'd moved our smoke counter 6 months earlier during our renovations. Moved it five metres to the right that is. He marched out of the store, then marched back, grabbed the milk from my hands, threw $5 at me and then left again. FML

I agree, your life sucks

9149

You deserved it

576

Tweet

Share

By Bob - 20/6/2009 04:22 - United States

Today, while teaching at a daycare, a child came up to me and asked if he could go to the bathroom. Obviously, I said it was fine. He then pulled his pants down, and pee on my brand new shoes, and all over my leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks

46953

You deserved it

4712

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - 17/9/2017 04:30

Today, after storing it for a year, driving it 750 miles to a new home, and waiting a week for a wall mount to come in, I was ready to hang the hand-painted, decorative window my brother gave me. The chain snapped as I picked it up and it shattered when it hit the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks

4138

You deserved it

309

Tweet

Share

Add a comment

You must be logged in to be able to post comments!

Create my account Sign in

Top comments

By Amanda Howard | 9

#7892015 - Tuesday 24 March 2020 19:33

it sucks to be "that person" trust me. just better to be alone

By raven_of_azarath | 32

#7892030 - Tuesday 24 March 2020 20:54

I was that person in a group chat, and I was one of the founding members. I ended up just leaving. Which caused way more drama than it should have. They didn’t care what I had to say, but everyone flipped when I left.

COMMENTS

By Amanda Howard | 9

#7892015 - Tuesday 24 March 2020 19:33

it sucks to be "that person" trust me. just better to be alone

Reply

Chen Zhibang | 8

#7892423 - Thursday 26 March 2020 2:04

Is it a useful conversation? If it is, stay. No point letting your ego get in the way.

By raven_of_azarath | 32

#7892030 - Tuesday 24 March 2020 20:54

I was that person in a group chat, and I was one of the founding members. I ended up just leaving. Which caused way more drama than it should have. They didn’t care what I had to say, but everyone flipped when I left.

By mike3775 | 32

#7892101 - Wednesday 25 March 2020 0:03

Just leave. If it causes drama, ignore it. That’s what I did in that situation, when I was “that person”

By Kelsie Lynn Christensen | 13

#7892135 - Wednesday 25 March 2020 5:55

Mute the convo

By sickerthanyou | 13

#7893486 - Monday 30 March 2020 6:54

You can always send a picture of your boner and they’ll kick you out and won’t stop talking about you for some time

By GalaxyGirl1123_fml | 12

#7894668 - Friday 3 April 2020 10:20

I'm sorry OP. You can still make friends that are better for you, more like you. ;)