Today, after 8 days of being on a medication that makes it hard to go to the bathroom and no luck taking laxatives and drinking coffee and apple juice, I finally got to go. Too bad I was at my desk at work when it happened. I washed out my pants in the bathroom and got to sit in wet pants for 4 hours. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, after 4 days of constipation, I finally pooped. Sadly, I was not on the toilet. FML
Today, I spent two hours trying to catch a urine sample whilst at urgent care due to my inability to pee in public restrooms. I finally managed one, and was so excited by my success that I fumbled it and spilled it on my pants. FML
Today, I had to take a laxative for the first time. Instead of working gently overnight like it promised, I woke up at 3 a.m. to an unrelenting river of shit that made my legs numb on the toilet. FML
Today, I've been chronically constipated so long that I was actually grateful for the sudden blast of diarrhea that ruined my pants. FML
Today, I was constipated and strained so hard that I threw up into my pants and all over my shoes. I was at work, and no, I didn’t have a change of clothes. FML
Today, I was finally able to get up and take a shit after being bedridden due to my knee surgery. I had diarrhea and because I can't properly bend my knee, I can't wipe my butt. FML
Today, I had to shit worse than I thought possible at work. I left my desk and hurried towards the bathroom, dropping trou as soon as the door closed. I then tripped over my pant leg, hit my head on the toilet, and came to some minutes later with my ass spewing diarrhea like a volcano. FML
Today, after a 2-hour meeting, I rushed to take an urgent dump. Unbeknownst to me, my urine was not hitting the porcelain bowl, but rather the underside of the lid. As it pooled around the pedestal, it soaked my pants, underwear, and when I stood up to button my pants, it got on my shirt too. FML
Today, my apartment management notified me that my water was going to be shut off all day so they could fix the plumbing. I took a laxative last night. FML
Today, I realized that the medication I take because of bowel issues only works for about 6 hours. After that, it's one run to the toilet after another. The problem is that I can only take it twice a day. FML
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Top comments
Inkoseh 33
Prune juice, not apple juice! Fibre (Metamucil) and water too. Also, when you're taking medication or narcotic pain medications that make it difficult to use the washroom, it's when you immediately should switch to a liquid diet. I really wish doctors inform people to change their diet to save SO much headache.
superjew 8
Well that’s a shitty thing to happen
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Comments (4)
superjew 8
Well that’s a shitty thing to happen
superjew 8
Well that’s a shitty thing to happen
Brightside86 31
Seems odd you couldn't just pop home or to a near by store and just buy some more pants. Also I'd really recommend keeping an overnight bag in your car. It's saved me a couple of times from spilled drinks or w/e at work.
Inkoseh 33
Prune juice, not apple juice! Fibre (Metamucil) and water too. Also, when you're taking medication or narcotic pain medications that make it difficult to use the washroom, it's when you immediately should switch to a liquid diet. I really wish doctors inform people to change their diet to save SO much headache.