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woahheylex This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff United States

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Today, after ordering pizza, I heard some strange noises coming from my basement so I called the cops. The pizza came fifteen minutes before the cops. FML

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Fall

Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.

Same thing different taste

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Shit you got pizza why you mad?

The joke is old, grandpa

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Comments (138)

you called the cops because you heard noises in your basement? I'm calling pussy

That's why they make S&W handguns for home protection.

Bet u called on a busy night aswell y not just go down there n see what it is and leave the police to do real work

Doesn't matter. What if it was a burglar or something/someone worse? My dad was out of town leaving my mom with me and my brother once. We slept in the same room and a fire alarm went off that night--no smell of smoke, and it hadn't been beeping to indicate a low battery either. We called the cops. Better safe than sorry.

That's how America is.

its wasnt a priority call so of course it took longer. you hearing a noise in your basement vs someone who is in imediete trouble.

Yeah, cops don't come running because you have mice in your house.

Did you you share the pizza with whoever was in your basement while you waited for the cops?